Was I wrong to refuse sale at work urgent advice needed

[LemonBlueberryX]

So this morning at work (I work in retail - but not a supermarket, think along the lines of b&m), someone came in and tried to buy an item. I was working on the till. When they came to the till I felt frozen on what to do as I didn’t feel comfortable selling this item in these circumstances (based on a stereotype of what this person looked like). I asked for ID (it’s a look25 item) hoping they wouldn’t have it so I could refuse sale but they did. After that I felt I had to make a choice and so I refused sale. Because of things that have happened in my area recently I felt that by allowing this sale I would be personally contributing to bad things.

They kicked off and asked for the manager who came over and asked me why I refused the sale and I just froze and couldn’t answer. Manager took over the till and served the person. The rest of my shift went on as normal but Managers just whatsapped me an hour ago asking me to come in at 10 tomorrow for a chat. I don’t work saturdays so not usually in. What do I say?

I dont really want this getting back to my manager so have tried to be vague about said item

That's awful of your manager to not explain what the meeting was about. Do people not see how mental health can spiral when there's a mysterious meeting demand?!

I get where you are coming from OP. He can go and buy a knife from someone else but at least your conscience is clear.

Whilst your manager should have explained, they may have held the meeting so soon after the event so you werent wondering whether the incident meant you'd failed your probation. They might have tried to do it to reassure you (and it backfired a bit)

Pleased for you. I've worked in retail and its not an easy job. I remember getting checked on a knife sale by T.Standards once. Luckily I didn't sell it to the lad but it's always on your mind when you sell age restricted products. You've had some v twatty responses on here but you've got good morals. These same people laying into you would also have laid in to you if you'd had posted about a similar incident where you'd sold the knife and said boy ended up in the local paper for committing knife crime and the knife was traced back to your shop. Then the twats would be calling you stupid and irresponsible. Etc.

Saw this post by our local police force today, @LemonBlueberryX

The last point says you can refuse the sale if you think the knife will be misused.

www.facebook.com/share/1CCcEF5KRY/

Yes that is a fair point!

I could but he wouldn't be wrong to assume he could buy one legally himself seeing as he is 18. He might buy online but we have had conversations about it being nice to see how a knife feels in your hand and how it is weighted so I can see him going to a cooking equipment type shop to browse and try them out and then maybe buy. He can be an impulsive shopper! I would look in person then see if I could get it cheaper online!

There is no need to be snarky. I was just suggesting a way in which the OP might take some positive action. Obviously she wasn't able to stop this sale and her judgement might be off because of her lived experience. The shop did not have a policy to enable the OP to refuse the sale (i.e. over 21) and there was no issue with his ID. The manager was happy to make the sale.

A number of posters have said that this was suspicious because a knife was the only thing he bought. A number of other posters have explained why that might be a genuine purchase and even that they have purchased one knife because they realised they needed a specific type, to replace one that was broken or just wanted a nicer knife to cook with than the ones potentially available to them at home.

My son is an 18 year old skinny white lad with a couple of piercings and a tattoo. He doesn't smell of weed though and does dress nicely most of the time so maybe he would have been served? Would he be more likely to be served if he were female or had his girlfriend with him?

If the issue is with the law, options would be to make it so it is illegal to sell to under 21s or to sell a single knife on it's own. I don't think allowing refusal because of stereotyping makes any sense and I think when the law says you can refuse a sale if you are concerned, that doesn't mean that you can refuse based on your life experience or stereotypes it means if that person is a known criminal or is behaving in a way to make you actually believe they intend to commit a crime. I don't think looking a bit rough or smelling of weed is enough. At the end of the day those people might be more likely to be fending for themselves or making their own dinner. The trouble with saying legally you can't only buy a knife is that the sale could go ahead if they picked up a mars bar or a lettuce with it so where do you draw the line? 5 items, 10? An adult man needs to be able to buy kitchen utensils at the end of the day.

The worst outcome of this is someone hasn’t been able to cut something up.
It’s not the end of the world to be refused service for a knife.
All those complaining their son’s might be refused based on their appearance, so? They can order them online.

I would say always trust your 'spidey sensors' if something feels wierd or wrong it probably is

You did the right thing OP. At the end of the day there are 2 scenarios. Number 1, that this boy was intending to use the knife for nefarious means or number 2 that he wanted a knife to cut up an onion. If it was the latter, then refusing a sale didn't ruin his life. If it was the former it would've prevented ruining his life and someone else's.

Just to add as well that like it or not sometimes "profiling" has a place. Remember the Ariana Grande concert where security guards were too scared to say anything about a highly unlikely concert goer.

OP, you’re not qualified or employed to make those decisions. What you did was profiling and I’m surprised you weren’t disciplined for it

She’s absolutely employed to make those decisions.

I have an 18 year old son and no way would he be buying a knife to help me out in the kitchen. I empathize with your decision.

What a relief! Well done on passing your probation 👏

No. The worst outcome is the Company she works for is landed with a discrimination claim filed against them and it costs them thousands of pounds.

you don’t have the right to refuse, but you do have the right to ask someone else to sell an item to the customer if you feel very uncomfortable dealing with it yourself. Speak to your manager. They probably want to know why you felt like you did.

Being an aggressive teenager who smells of weed is not a legally protected characteristic.

@Engineweld she absolutely does have the right and in fact the obligation to refuse the sale if she has any doubts. I don't know why you decided to speak with such authority on a subject you know nothing about!

MN like profiling sometimes dont they. For example sex profiling tells us that men are the likely perpetrators of particular crimes, mostly violent, often sexual, often against women.

For some reason, any other type of profiling is met with clutching of pearls and wringing of hands about how thats so judgemental.

Some agitated little scruffy scrote smelling of weed is likely to be up to no good.

He wasn't aggressive until she unlawfully discriminated against him. The op only decided he smelled of weed halfway through the thread. Her original reason for not serving him were that he was 18 and male.

Can you please set out the legal basis on which you are claiming the Op “unlawfully discriminated” against the teenager?

The words "unlawfully" and "discriminated" have actual legal definitions. Please look up the specific law from England & Wales OR Scotland that you wish to rely on in this discrimination case. You may use google.

Oh bore off with your profiling crap. I bet you'd be straight on to head office demanding compensation and the OP sacked. You know absolutely nothing about what she is qualified or employed for. You can refuse a sale is you think it may be misused.

YANBU. I mean, come on, what was he going to do with it … race home to cook up a storm?? 🙄
And the fact that he kicked off at the till doesn’t look good.
You were right to listen to your instinct, even if in this situation it didn’t work out.