To think it's unacceptable to say you don't like children?

[BirdPlanet]

Increasingly I've heard people saying some variation of the statement 'I don't like children'. I don't see why this is in any way acceptable. You wouldn't say that you 'don't like' any other category of person. If I said I didn't like the elderly or middle-aged women as a group, I'd get slapped down, yet somehow people think it's okay to talk about children as if they aren't human beings. Is it because they can't speak or advocate for themselves? Children aren't some kind of homogeneous entity. They have personalities and different temperaments, just as adults do.

Inevitably people will say that it's used as a shorthand for disliking the behaviour of some children, but even so, that’s more of a reflection of poor parenting than anything else.

I have 3 kids. I’m so over kids 😂

I wouldn't find it unacceptable if someone said it to me.🤷‍♀️. Most times, I'd agree with and contribute to their very reasonable points.

YABU @BirdPlanet.

Of course it’s acceptable. It’s their opinion. You can’t control it. Same as someone saying they don’t like pets. Why you offended by people saying they don’t like children? It dies not affect you or invalid your life choices whatsoever.

Thing is it's fine to not like something or not enjoy them. Children are really only interesting to their own family. No one is saying that they want them to come to any harm or anything.

My boss has chosen to be child free, she doesn't like children and says it often. It doesn't offend me at all. I have children. I know what she means and I understand why she goes on adult only holidays etc.

Why is this so hard to understand?
The people saying they don't like children aren't anti children or discriminating against them. they just dislike them as a group due to them being loud, annoying etc. but I'm sure even they like some specific children!

But why do you care? It doesn’t affect your life whatsoever. Would you feel the same way if someone said they don’t like birds? Or red cars? Other people’s opinions do not invalidated your choices if you have children?

Who is saying this post is about Childfree people? Op didn’t mention that. Plenty of parents don’t like other people’s children.

Are you the OP that was posting about her loud children, screaming and disturbing her neighbour?

It’s a very cultural thing mostly American and English . Seems to be a fashion trend that goes hand in hand with women deciding not to have children ( which is fine ) . The thing is as you say , children are a massive part of society , I grew up in south Europe where children are seen as fundamental and as the ones to be the most protected , example is children are given seats in public transport , parents with children have priority checkout in shopping etc .
When I moved to the uk 25 years ago I was in shock at how children are seen as a burden almost . Can’t go out after a certain hour , can’t accompany parents to appointments etc .
For me children are the must vulnerable abd tte most important in any society .

YABVU people are entitled to not like something. I have one child who I adore and they are my world, but aside from them, I don’t like children, any other children.

Depends on what people find offensive. People say they hate teenagers, which I suppose legally they are children. But people hate lots of things. You can’t police other people’s opinions.

I agree with you, OP.

I was reading a thread recently about children on aeroplanes. I’m sure you can imagine the kind of comments that were made on that thread. Some examples:

• There should be adult only flights. I would happily pay for that.

• You might like your children, but no one else needs to tolerate them.

• Nothing worse than boarding a flight, and seeing children sitting next to/behind you.

• There should be a child only section on flights at the back so they can’t disturb other passengers. Actually, children should be in the hold.

No one really seemed to have an issue with any of these comments. There weren’t even said in jest. These were serious comments. Speaking about children as if they are subhuman. Could you imagine wandering onto a male forum, and reading comments like:

• There should be male only flights. I would happily pay for that.

• You might like your wife, but no one else needs to tolerate her.

• Nothing worse than boarding a flight, and seeing a woman sitting next to/behind you.

• There should be a woman only section on flights at the back so they can’t disturb other passengers. Actually, women should be in the hold.

Even other men would be challenging these kinds of comments.

But it’s apparently acceptable for women to speak about children in this way.

What Op originally said was “people” she didn’t use the word Childfree which I suspect is who she was really on about it. And then other people started to bring up Childfree people hating children…plenty of parents hate children. I suspect someone, probably a Childfree person has pissed her off and she’s needing validation on her choices. Hence the goady post 🙄 why do you care? It’s literally doesn’t affect your life. I don’t get offended when people say something that I have chosen to do.

All children are different. I see it as a fairly ignorant comment tbh. YANBU.

OPs child is a baby so more likely someone hasn't acknowledged that she has the most beautiful baby ever to be born. 😆

But I'd hazard a guess and say that those most bothered by it probably have the children that evoke 'those' feelings. You can hear it in the language used 🤷‍♀️
Throwing Naziism in there was takiing it a tad too far though 🙄
I've had a few children, love them, they're fab, but I don't particularly like other children that much. It's not even 'children' really, it's the parents that ruin it by raising entitled children with no boundaries, no manners and no consideration of others in social situations. So, if there is an option of 'child free', I'm absolutely going to take it. Just wish there were more childfree options but parents get so wound up if their precious darlings can't go everywhere and anywhere.

People are also not engaging with how socially acceptable it is to say you dislike children
But 'people' have. 'You', as in the general offended 'you' just don't accept any other viewpoints 🤷‍♀️

I‘ve known a few people who have said this, I think they think they’re being edgy as they wait for the shocked faces when they say it.

One seemed disappointed when I just said ‘oh right’ and then they started telling me why. When I still didn’t react, they said ‘are you shocked?’ They clearly wanted a reaction but I just thought they were stupid for writing off a whole group of people. A group that would turn what, 18, 21, 25 and then these child haters would suddenly consider liking them? It’s just bizarre.

Ridiculous again. I would happily pay for an adult only flight (and I hope the adults would behave)

Comparing those who want parent and child (noisy ) sections to male only flights where woman are put in the hold?

Are you ok?

Do you object to adult only (child free ) hotels?

Is it really so wrong or bad that I want a quiet environment without children running around being very noisy...

That"s what children do and it's lovely, I'd you like that .
But I'm not allowed to say I want a child free space read my book in peace?

I think anyone who thinks they can’t learn something from children is very closed off to experiences and will undoubtedly miss something. Children often have some interesting and fresh perspectives on things, having not yet been made cynical from having much life experience. I think it can be lovely to see young children chatting with older people, they can teach each other so much.

Ridiculous again.

Care to elaborate on what is ridiculous, exactly?

Not sharing your perspective doesn’t make something ridiculous.

Comparing those who want parent and child (noisy ) sections to male only flights where woman are put in the hold?

I made zero comparisons. I simply substituted the word “children” for “women”. As you know.

Are you ok?

I’m grand, thanks.

Or were you insinuating that there must be something wrong with me because I have an issue with the language used when talking about children. Language that no one would find acceptable if used to talk about any other group of people.

I agree with this . Children can be a breath of fresh air and like a new pair of eyes..seeing the world in a way adults have forgotten because life gets rough.

But I want to back to the lady talking about the awfulness of asking for child sections on planes.

Would you let your child kick someone's seat for hours. ? Would you ignore that person when they asked you to control your child? Ignore the flight attendant when they ask?

The :I don't have to put up with other people's children is more than appropriate in this a a scenario

But as I said in my earlier post. The children aren't at fault. It's their parents who think that everyone else should have to fit around their life choices. Demonstrated multiple times on this thread

Children are not equal to adults. They don’t have equivalent responsibilities or accountability, and they don’t have equivalent rights and privileges.

There is a reason every human society ever has had rites of passage between childhood and adulthood. Children are not just mini adults.

Their presence is neither appropriate nor welcome everywhere.

(childfree flights, performances, cinema, museum hours, restaurants, pubs, etc. sound heavenly. I’d happily pay a significant upcharge for any of them.)

Kids definitely have a different energy to adults, do I enjoy it? Nah, not really. Anyone I know who massively enjoys ‘big kid’ energy maybe feels similarly about adults. Cool.

Hating things or hating people are not the same, which is the OP's point. It is actually illegal to encourage the hatred of others, hate speech and discrimination against people. It isn't illegal to hate things.

Of course children have equavalient rights to adults. Jesus fucking Christ!
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/united-nations-convention-on-the-rights-of-the-child-uncrc-how-legislation-underpins-implementation-in-england

Good lord! You think that anyone who says they don't like children is just pretending, because they secretly wanted children and is just bitter because they couldn't have them?!?!?!?

Get a grip!

I’m talking socially, not legally.

Normal people understand the difference.