Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

BBC news using the phrase "broken home"

315 replies

IsitaHatOrACat · 14/05/2025 04:35

Really? Really? Whilst I'm not overly interested to know about this man's drug fuelled years, the description of him coming from a "broken home" has infuriated me.
As a single parent to a 15 year old, I can confirm that there us nothing whatsoever "broken" about our home or small family.
I really thought we had moved on from this type of shaming of single parent families
Seriously BBC, do better.

BBC News - Heavy hangs the crown - sadness at Wiggins' troubles
www.bbc.com/sport/cycling/articles/c23mv42m2lmo

OP posts:
nomas · 14/05/2025 07:09

Renabrook · 14/05/2025 07:00

why not a shit mother? why is it always assumed the father is the bad one?

Because his father WAS the bad one.

Wowitsthunder · 14/05/2025 07:11

I think it’s an awful term and I haven’t heard it for years. I have been a single parent for ten years and nobody I know has ever used it and I hope no one refers to my children as being from a ‘broken home.’

frozendaisy · 14/05/2025 07:13

jeaux90 · 14/05/2025 06:43

Agree with you OP. I fixed my home when I left my abusive ex. Lone parenting my DD16 since she was 1. It’s very offensive and inaccurate.

But maybe Bradley’s mum didn’t or couldn’t.

If, say, politicians used “broken homes” in Parliament to describe single parents, that’s offensive, that’s an assumption applied to all single parents, or in an article about “single parenthood”.

This article is an about one specific household at a particular time, in this case, it might be accurate.

It’s two arguments.

Using broken homes as a generic description
Using broken home when it accurately describes

I think it’s concerning to say you can never use a term accurately in specific circumstances because it doesn’t apply to that entire demographic

newyearsresolurion · 14/05/2025 07:16

Separated, divorced homes have always been referred to as 'a broken home' it's up to people how you really want to interpret it . My parents divorced when I was a baby I might have been 'broken' but never known or felt it it as my grandparents helped to raise me and I had a wonderful childhood. Am separated too and happy and my kids are happier in a home without parents' fighting so I wouldn't think they're 'broken' nor will I ever get offended by the use of that phrase as it doesn't apply in my case.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 14/05/2025 07:22

Feetinthegrass · 14/05/2025 07:05

Op I think it’s the negativity that surrounds the term, it’s supremely unhelpful. Most schools now teach families look all different and are unique. It seems we are still living with the hangover of the insistence that only whole families exist with two parents, as if it’s a form of utopia. It’s very odd. Children should be taught that all families are ‘whole’ regardless of set up.

If your experience is one of a ‘broken home’ which can be with parents together or not, that indicates poor parenting or an ACE of some kind, rather than the organisation and structure of the family itself.

Parental separation is an ACE
https://images.app.goo.gl/CyWZ98HXhP3ovZYs9

BBC news using the phrase "broken home"
pinkstripeycat · 14/05/2025 07:24

It’s not shaming. It’s just a description. A way of describing a family with divorced parents. I think it’s fine.

I don’t feel ashamed that I’m from a broken home or that I’m being shamed. I wasn’t ashamed my mum was a single parent and neither was she as she was too busy working her arse off to keep a roof over our heads.

Growing up I always missed one parent while I was with the other. I have always wanted to know what happens at Xmas and at family get togethers when parents have been married for years instead of sharing my dad, my old family home with a stepmum and half siblings. I had a stepdad from the age of 10-19. Sadly a 2nd time I came from a broken home. I missed him the most.

I’ve been married for 25yrs and ask DH and my DC what it’s like having parents together. They don’t know any different but it fascinates me.

AgnesX · 14/05/2025 07:26

Its a very old fashioned phrase but it's an instant descriptor. Way back when it was first used that's mostly why women left.

I'd really not get too upset about it.

AngelinaFibres · 14/05/2025 07:28

frozendaisy · 14/05/2025 05:02

But it probably is a perfectly accurate description for the article. This report is on a particular person not an opinion piece on single parent households.

Journalists aren’t going to stop, or shouldn’t, stop using applicable language because it winds someone up or they take personal offence over something out of context.

This. It was less usual to come from a single parent household years ago . My parents were appalled( in the mid nineties) that I was divorcing my husband and was a single parent . It was completely socially inappropriate amongst their circle of friends. I was told ( by a man whilst stuck with a double buggy in a Tesco queue) that I was disgusting because I'd had children out of wedlock. I was no longer wearing my wedding ring and he decided I was therefore clearly a tart.It was far , far less socially acceptable when this man was a child. Perfectly reasonable term.

PalePinkPeony · 14/05/2025 07:29

IsitaHatOrACat · 14/05/2025 05:18

But broken home refers to divorced parents, not a home where abuse occurs. I'm genuinely surprised at some of the responses on here.

My take is that this kind of language prevents people in abusive relationships separating due to societal responses and stigma perpetuated by the media (and some politicians but that's another thread...)

Journalists should absolutely stop using language which causes offence. One example being how reports on men who murder their ex-spouses/spouses no longer include positive character references such as being a "family-man" following a campaign (which I can't remember the name of)

Edited

Broken home is traditionally used to describe when the family unit of mother father and kids has broken apart - usually for reasons other than death.
Its not a particularly nice phrase to use IMO and doesn’t really reflect most people’s views on households that don’t have mum, dad children in 2025
Yes this man’s home may well have been ‘broken’ as in an abusive house or dysfunctional house but that’s not what this term traditionally means

Banmooo · 14/05/2025 07:32

IsitaHatOrACat · 14/05/2025 05:23

It's a swipe at all single parents. Not just me! This kind if stigma prevent parents ending abusive relationships. See also "failed marriage"

It doesn't prevent anything of the sort, the stats prove that.
And it is a failed marriage.

FortyElephants · 14/05/2025 07:34

arcticpandas · 14/05/2025 06:36

The family unit is broken. If you were single having a child you're family unit is not broken. I don't see what's wrong with "broken family", I come from one. Since you are reacting so negatively to it maybe you're projecting because you're divorced?

Of course I'm projecting! It's appalling language to describe my family and I wholeheartedly reject it.

arcticpandas · 14/05/2025 07:37

FortyElephants · 14/05/2025 07:34

Of course I'm projecting! It's appalling language to describe my family and I wholeheartedly reject it.

I agree that it's not necessary to use that term. I never have even though it very accurately describes where I come from. I would just say divorced parents and I think most people do.

MatildaMovesMountains · 14/05/2025 07:37

The phrase broken home is exclusively used to describe separation/divorce; it's never used to describe abuse, or poverty, or drug addiction, or anything else. People are being really disingenuous on here. I 100% agree with you OP, it's lazy, offensive and outdated language.

See also "jilted boyfriend" for men who murder women.

Icexream · 14/05/2025 07:39

I think they must have edited the article, I can't see any reference to a broken home, but it does sound like his childhood was "broken", even if your son's isn't.

MatildaMovesMountains · 14/05/2025 07:40

Banmooo · 14/05/2025 07:32

It doesn't prevent anything of the sort, the stats prove that.
And it is a failed marriage.

You can call it failed marriage, I can call it personal growth and liberation.

Just out of interest, do you refer to all big life changes as failures? Is your previous job a failed employment? Is your old house a failed home because you moved out?

Sad really to live your life so negatively.

helpfulperson · 14/05/2025 07:40

I think there is a lot of minimising of the effects of divorce on children. Their home is broken by divorce, that is exactly how it feels for most children. It stops being what it was and becomes something else different. Yes sometimes it is the best or only option but that doesn't mean it doesn't have a significant impact. In some ways where there isn't abuse/affairs etc it is harder because the child can't understand why they couldn't all stay together.

BHBlue · 14/05/2025 07:41

arcticpandas · 14/05/2025 06:45

I wasn't responding to you but to another poster. I was just stating that I come from a broken home because my parents divorced. There was no abuse but at 11 their divorce broke me down and I suffered immensily because I felt my home was broken and therefore so was I.

One good reason why calling a single parent household a broken home can be unhelpful for the child

Dysfunctional, abusive home or separated parents is more accurate language

RosesAndHellebores · 14/05/2025 07:44

arcticpandas · 14/05/2025 05:22

My take on it is that you come from a broken home when your parents get a divorce. So a single parent who always been single is not defined as a broken home. My parents got divorced when I was 11 and yes, I felt as though my home was broken and as if I was broken. I worried constantly about my dad comitting suicide. It was a nasty divorce and it left indelible scars.

In my case there was no dv involved though. I think that if there is dv/abuse the home is already broken whether the the parents stay together or not.

💯. Sorry you went through it too. I was 12 and the only girl in my class whose parents were divorced. Everyone knew.

aspidernamedfluffy · 14/05/2025 07:45

I think "dysfunctional childhood" would be better than "broken home" when it comes to describing the sort of upbringing he had.

FortyElephants · 14/05/2025 07:46

ThisOldThang · 14/05/2025 06:56

When you combine that knowledge with how casually the advice to 'LTB' is thrown around along with such vacuous slogans as 'you only have one life and you deserve to be happy', perhaps there should be a bit more stigma?

"My DH works in the ER. The other night he was dealing with the aftermath of a train crash. He came home, crawled into bed and cried. When I got out of bed, I realised he'd left his pants on the floor.'

"I can't believe he's disrespected you like that! How dare he! He'll never change and there's no excuse. LTB!!!"

What a load of absolute nonsense

Happyholidays78 · 14/05/2025 07:49

I haven't heard the term 'broken home' in years & agree OP it is offensive & I say this as a person who does not come from a 'broken home' & has been with my partner my whole adult life, it's a horrible term & very outdated!

Swiftie1878 · 14/05/2025 07:50

IsitaHatOrACat · 14/05/2025 06:36

I'm not arguing that and this shouldn't be open to debate and more understanding (whilst considering factors such as poverty, disability, poor housing, mental health, effects of domestic abuse etc)
My issue is with the language used which has massive negative connotations and perpetuates stereotypes

Edited

I think that if ‘being brought up by a single parent’ is being used to partially explain his descent into drugs, the use of ‘broken home’ is better language to use.
It more accurately conveys how he felt about his situation and how it could impact him, and excludes families like yours that are happily single-parent.

FortyElephants · 14/05/2025 07:50

Serpentstooth · 14/05/2025 06:57

Changing the language doesn't change the circumstances. However you want to describe a situation that began as a 2 parent family unit which then fell apart, it's broken, for whatever reason.

It's not though. The home is not broken. The relationship is over, you might even say the marriage is broken if you like that kind of overblown emotive language but the HOME is not.

Stargazingstargazer · 14/05/2025 07:51

The beeb should be picked up on this… it is an outdated phrase from a time when divorce and separation were seen as shameful. Children carry the stigma of these kinds of views. If the home was also dysfunctional or abusive then that may be relevant to the story, but it is a completely separate issue. Reminds me of the time they saw fit to report on Theresa May becoming PM by interviewing her father for his views. How old fashioned and inappropriate…. Felt very infantilising and sexist.

Viviennemary · 14/05/2025 07:51

You have got an issue with the term and are quite defensive. But I can understand why you feel this way. There are all sorts of homes. Some happy some sad and involve a lot of different factors. Not all lumped together.

Swipe left for the next trending thread