To stop my son from presenting as Jewish at school

[Wonderberry]

I really wish this wasn't the case.

My son wants to wear his kippah (skullcap) at school. This is entirely his choice, and something that he has chosen to start wearing recently. He just wants to express his religious and cultural background.

Unfortunately, I don't feel like he would be safe to do so. I hate that this is where we are at currently in the UK, but I know it is the reality. He goes to a community school in London, and doesn't understand why he cannot wear his kippah at school. On cultural days, he also cannot share his culture either.

Well that's partly what I'm asking and why I'm asking.

ODFO.

jesus christ no wonder people are gwetting attacked the ignorance and antisemistism on theis thr4ead is disgusting

would you stop someone talking about korea or china in school no you wouldnt talking about your heritage has nothing to do with with a war

I'm not going to answer this, as I don't think it's relevant, and would be outing, but given the state of Israel was only established in 1948, this is bound to be recent family history. He has close family currently in Israel.

It shouldn't be for others to quantify whether a child or adult can identify with any particular part of their heritage, this is something that is deeply personal.

Wasn’t that later, though?

I think the difficulty is that there will be many classrooms with children who have heritage on both sides of the conflict.
They are not responsible for it and not old enough to have an adult understanding of the complexities.
I think that it is sensible of the staff to make their classrooms a zone where that isn't discussed for everyone's emotional safety.
I would suggest the same in class where for example you have children from a Russian heritage and those with linked to Ukraine (very feasible situation in my part of the world)

Religion and politics evoke strong feelings and responses and I think that when children are involved that needs to be handles very carefully.

Especially when you have families that perceive threat in other groups. E.g. there is a woman upthread who has told her daughter not to wear a Star of David necklace to medical appointments in case the practitioner is sympathetic to Gaza. Similarly you may have children of Palestinian heritage who will have been taught to fear someone from an Israeli heritage (and this may be equally unfair).

These viewpoints, the potential for prejudice blame etc is high. I can see why a pp said they no longer teach the Arab Israeli conflict at GCSE.

But schools also need to teach that different people may choose to wear different religions attire and teach mutual respect for this.

That is quite a political statement.

If your son hears a view like this and repeats it in school ot may well cause quite an emotive response from others who have heard the same or opposite at home.

Having taught in the primary age range, children hear and pick up far more than we give them credit for.

Sometimes the school has to make a decision.
There was a yr 6 child who wanted to wear some kind of Russian army uniform on a similar day but the school said no. Poor kid was really frustrated and kept saying that it wasn’t the actual army uniform but the school insisted, for his own safety and for the consideration of the Ukrainian kids.
It would have been lovely if the school could have allowed it and shown the way to inclusivity, acceptance and world peace but you can’t undo the web of opinions and attitudes that children absorb from outside school.

I couldn't imagine seeing anybody hold misbehave and assuming that all children from that culture aren't very nice.

Sadly, I might be wrong, but I am picking up a sense from some posters (not in an aggressive way, bore an anxious way) that only other Jewish children are safe to be around. The poster upthread for example who stated that the OPs son should go to a Jewish school because 'that is where Jewish Children belong'; the poster who said that her child feels safe at school and makes the link that there are Jewish students and peers there.

I think that on both sides this 'othering' and fear of people who don't belong to your religion/culture is dangerous.

I posted upthread about the fact that my step daughter, of South Asian appearance was physically beaten and racially abused. The only response this evoked was a particularly nasty poster suggesting I had made it up. Yet there are umpteen posts where posters claim to be 'crying' 'sobbing' and 'heartbroken' that OP feels nervous about her son wearing a Kippah out and about.

When pressed on what risk they fear, it's basically people asking uncomfortable questions or making comments. I am quite sure that happens to many young people wearing religious attire. School need to do their job and ensure that any such discussion is positive, unbiased and age appropriate.

I think we all need to remember that we have far more in common that sets us apart.

My children are almost never around other Jewish children so that's definitely nothing I'm implying. They are the only ones in our area and the only ones at either of their schools. Definitely spend 99% of my life not even thinking about it, but I always know I need to be ready.

Have a phone call with my daughter's school later as the child who pushed my daughter in the hallway and wrote Free Palestine on her schoolbag has just been moved into one of her classes and is actually sitting at a table with her. So this is the 1% of my life where I need to jump into action.

There really are some bad faith posters still hanging around.

Sorry I should have been clear that I meant some posters not all, and you absolutely haven't suggested this.

I'm very sorry that happened to your daughter at schools and I hope it was dealt with robustly. I hope she is ok.

I feel the UK is generally becoming more racist and hostile to minority groups/ anyone whose physical appearance or religious observation sets them apart and it's awful to see.

The bit that was a political statement is acknowledgement that her family's Israeli heritage must be recent generations as the countey did not exist then, and previously there would consider their heritage American.

Political may the wrong word. Politically controversial? I just mean it may elicit a strong reaction from other kids who's family heritage is either linked to Israel or Palestine.

I don't mean it was a political statement as in taking sides.

Genuinely laughing at the fact that in the first paragraph you can't see people judging a whole culture for the actions of a few but in the next paragraph you're seemingly implying that Jewish people are too unreasonably anxious because of two posters 😂😂😂

Meanwhile, most Jewish posters haven't said that, but for some reason that wasn't worthy of a mention by you.

Anyway, the risks you have repeatedly ignored, denied or minimised include verbal and physical harassment, bullying and in my case, anonymous hate mail sent to our home address with fake anthrax in the envelope. This was back when anthrax was featured heavily in the news.

Just accept that Jewish people aren't irrationally anxious, we actually have reason to be.

I asked my uni daughter to stop wearing her star of david. She is recognisably jewish and looks like many of the young women raped and killed on Oct 7. She had already been jeered at and threatened to have the same done to her. So called liberal city of Brighton. So much for never again eh.

Yeah that really isn't what I said. Crack on.

There was nothing even remotely political about it. The poster was clearly implying it would have to have been a parent or grandparent who was Israeli as the country isn't old enough for it to have been anyone older than that. That's all. You're reading far too much info it.

The child in question is partly of Israeli heritage and wasn't allowed to mention it. That's disgusting.

You did. It's right there in your post.

Anyway, well done on once again ignoring the part where you're once again informed of the risks we face, and the risks this 7 year old boy will also face if he's openly Jewish. I'm sorry the information doesn't suit your favoured narrative, that must be quite upsetting for you 😱

That is horrible. I think this kind of open racism is sadly becoming more common across th UK.

My step daughter has had kids shouting 'paki' at her (this is aside from the physical assault I mentioned)I know that my friends Muslim daughter had her hijab pulled off by some boys at her school who thought it was funny, endless talk of 'boat people'. It's a sad state of affairs.

You do load your comment a bit with 'she looks like many of the young women raped and killed on October 7'. If someone made that comment about a Muslim girl but changed it to 'the girls being raped and bombed in palestine' that would be just as loaded.

Anyway I believe that many posters feel that the Israeli Palestine conflict should not be referred to in this thread. So perhaps that's a post for another thread.

mentioning that Israel has only been a country since 1948 is basic fact, not politics.

i do wonder id rhe school would have the same stance towards Palestinian children. And what if they'd been in the area for longer? Whilst most Jewish Israelis are the descendants of more recent immigrants I know people who are the descendants of Jews who lived there for generations. Unless they ban talk of heritage from other places facing political conflict this is discrimination.

Not really. Limiting discussion of heritage where you have kids with heritage on both sides of an active and very bloody conflict is protecting them.

You know full well that not everyone shares that viewpoint. Your insistence on setting your viewpoint as universally accepted isn't helpful.