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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Teacher showing photos to kids of victorian dead children - slightly disturbing

585 replies

whyiwonderwhy · 25/04/2025 23:51

I am finding this so disturbing I can't sleep! However I might be being oversensitive, who knows. It is the "but - WHY?" bit which is bothering me most.

The lesson was about the industrial revolution, and the subject of photography came up, 2 of the earliest photos were shown to the class (13-14yo) and then....I wish I could say the teacher showed photos of some of the extraordinary engineering inventions of the day, or of busy streets, or China, or something wonderful and extraordinary...but no, the teacher showed 10 photos of dead children and talked about how the Victorians would photograph dead children as though they were still alive, with the rest of the family, in a commemorative way. I have seen some in the past (I didn't learn about it at school however) and they are moving and tragic and disturbing. Nothing else, just these photos.

Just wondering...why? why would the teacher do this? Any ideas?

This teacher has form by the way. A lot of it. But this has for some reason blindsided me.

OP posts:
forgotmyusername1 · 26/04/2025 06:06

whyiwonderwhy · 26/04/2025 00:51

Really saddens me to hear this from a teacher. I studied the industrial revolution at school and at degree level, and I know the teacher and I know the kids and yes I would be able to engage the class without resorting to this sort of weirdness. I know exactly what i am talking about and you really don't. Sorry.

There are a shortfall of 6500 teachers in the uk. Maybe you should become a history teacher yourself?

gollyimholly · 26/04/2025 06:14

I remember when we learned about the slave trade in year 8 and the teacher showed us a photo of the people standing to be sold at an auction. And how some had pieces of rope inserted into their bottoms to hide the fact they had dysentry. I couldn't believe any of it. That people could actually be sold, that they were taken from their homes, that they'd had rope in their bottoms. I remember asking the teacher if it was really true... And then went home and vomited and cried. I was massively naive at that age and I can imagine how certain things can make some children respond in a more emotional way than others.

I also remember watching a video of dead baby foetuses following an abortion and the baby making a crying expression in an ultrasound as the abortion began to take place. This was year 10 though so I think I was more resilient but it still makes me feel sad when I think about those images.

Maybe it was seeing the visual evidence but it's all still very vivid in my mind 20+ years later. It might have been the teachers were very good too.. because really, I don't think I remember that much (specific content) from other lessons. That said, I didn't actually like it ie. the strong negative feelings evoked by the imagery. But maybe that's the point too...

BottleBlondeMachiavelli · 26/04/2025 06:19

gollyimholly · 26/04/2025 06:14

I remember when we learned about the slave trade in year 8 and the teacher showed us a photo of the people standing to be sold at an auction. And how some had pieces of rope inserted into their bottoms to hide the fact they had dysentry. I couldn't believe any of it. That people could actually be sold, that they were taken from their homes, that they'd had rope in their bottoms. I remember asking the teacher if it was really true... And then went home and vomited and cried. I was massively naive at that age and I can imagine how certain things can make some children respond in a more emotional way than others.

I also remember watching a video of dead baby foetuses following an abortion and the baby making a crying expression in an ultrasound as the abortion began to take place. This was year 10 though so I think I was more resilient but it still makes me feel sad when I think about those images.

Maybe it was seeing the visual evidence but it's all still very vivid in my mind 20+ years later. It might have been the teachers were very good too.. because really, I don't think I remember that much (specific content) from other lessons. That said, I didn't actually like it ie. the strong negative feelings evoked by the imagery. But maybe that's the point too...

Edited

What kind of hellish hard right education was that? A particularly bonkers convent school? Who shows explicit anti-abortion peopaganda footage to teens?

WonderingWanda · 26/04/2025 06:21

Just to clarify that your thread title 'Teacher showing photos to kids of victorian dead children, slightly disturbing' Isn't actually the problem you have? You began your thread saying it was disturbing to you and then based on posters respo ses seem to have veered more into not covering the actual topic. How recently was this lesson? Could the teacher move on to the inventions in another lesson?

When you say the teacher has form for this do you mean showing "disturbing" images or not covering the curriculum?

If your child has been upset by the images then you should let the teacher know, I would always give children the option to sit out of upsetting content or give them a warning at first. I can imagine that some children might be upset by these photos, especially those who have had a recent berevement or lost a sibling. If it is about curriculum coverage then take a look through you child's book with a copy of the curriculum, figure out what hasn't been covered and then maybe approach the subject lead or head of year with your concerns. Probably best to be really clear about what the issue is so you don't come across as having a grudge.

merrymelody · 26/04/2025 06:25

Bah! I would have been fascinated by this as a child, not even remotely disturbing.

Kilroyonly · 26/04/2025 06:29

I guarantee they’ve seen worse online. If you’re seriously that affected by such a trivial non issue I would suggest you get them therapy before they ever visit a war museum

Hercisback1 · 26/04/2025 06:33

Part of learning History is evaluating sources to see what we can learn about the time. These photographs could have been a source. Students need to see both the broad base, and the zoom in on a small part of History because both skills are useful.

SuperSange · 26/04/2025 06:39

Jesus Christ. They probably spent five mins looking at the picture with a bit of context around it. Do you usually blindly accept everything your child says as gospel? You know they exaggerate? Your response is completely disproportionate.

TeenyTotAndTiny · 26/04/2025 06:48

People are lining the streets to take photos of the deceased pope in his coffin. Just saying!

Neemie · 26/04/2025 06:50

I watched a video of penguins rotating in a huddle with my class last week. I can’t remember how it came up and I’m sure it isn’t relevant to anything I’m teaching at the moment. We all found it pretty interesting though.

There is no way they will be teaching the Industrial Revolution without looking at Victorian society in general. I would have found their attitudes towards death very interesting at this age. You clearly found the Industrial Revolution fascinating but others would find other things about the Victorian era interesting.

heffalumpwoozle · 26/04/2025 06:52

whyiwonderwhy · 26/04/2025 00:10

It doesn't upset me at all, and the victorian photos of dead children don't upset me either. But the victorian photos are exactly as you describe - sitting them dressed as though alive - like a row of children with the dead child at the end propped up as though alive. Or two children hugging their dead mother but the mother is sat up with eyes open as though alive. So that is what I meant by slightly disturbing.

But as I said in the OP it was the "but why show these photos in that lesson" ie the wtf element to it which i very disturbing.

It just seems so weird to me to do that. It was the context. The photos were completely out of context

I suppose it draws attention to the way in which the culture of the time was so vastly different to our own, which is a key point of learning in history.

It entirely depends how it was approached. If it was 'eurgh, look at these dead children, weren't the victorians WEIRD?!' then that's obviously problematic.

If it's a mature and educational discussion about different ways in which we see/ deal with death as a culture, then that sounds like a very interesting thing to engage young people of that age in thinking and talking about.

Emanresuunknown · 26/04/2025 06:58

5foot5 · 26/04/2025 00:16

That's interesting. And yes, I do realise that the Industrial Revolution created a lot of social change.

I think it's important that this sort of thing is taught, but hope that it is alongside other important changes that led to this.

Still not sure why OP was expecting China.

The industrial revolution is a big topic, they'll study it for weeks. Isn't it on the gcse syllabus?
Quite obviously they'll also go on to cover the Spinning Jenny, and steam power and all that, I doubt the teacher just does victoriana death photographs and leaves it there.
Yr9 are a tough audience she was probably using the macabre to reel them in.

Genevieva · 26/04/2025 07:00

whyiwonderwhy · 26/04/2025 00:05

Yes i see that but the subject was the industrial revolution - so the only way to engage the class is to show them photos of dead children and nothing else?! Really?!! Not about the actual amazing inventions of the industrial revolution? i mean showing photos of children working down mines would at least be on topic!

How long are they studying thr Industrial Revolution for? I’d expect at least half a term to a term and I’d expect them to cover the following:

  • timelines
  • primary and secondary sources
  • the spinning Jenny (Hargreaves)
  • water power
  • Arkwright’s Cromford Mill
  • Coal and Steam power
  • Newcomen engine (Watts)
  • changes in work patterns away from cottage industries into factories
  • changes in child labour
  • Urbanisation
  • Disease outbreaks like cholera and the decline in life expectancy
  • John Snow and the Broad Street Pump.
  • Joseph Bazalgette and the design of London’s sewage system
  • Other Industrial Revolution inventions, perhaps as individual research and presentation projects. This could include the camera, telephone, locomotive, car, plane…
The photos you mention could easily come into lessons on children in that period, child mortality or the social impact of technological advances. They reflect a time that was less squeamish about death and a loved one died many people would have no image of them. This was their last chance. They fell out of favour as more people had living photos of loved ones. Kids live this stuff. I wouldn’t be at all concerned.
Sodesperatelysad · 26/04/2025 07:03

I remember learning about this at the same age as your DD. It sparked a years long fascination with the Victorians and history in general so YABU.

MargaretThursday · 26/04/2025 07:05

When I was that age we were shown Mississippi Burning in school for a racism discussion.
We were also shown the Scream anti-abortion film mentioned above. We were told that the group coming into show it would tell us if we were upset by it we could walk out, but they were telling us we couldn't.
The death photos of Victorian are not that shocking and an interesting side of Victoriana. I didn't find them upsetting at all. More tragic because it would be their only picture of the person often.

GrammarTeacher · 26/04/2025 07:11

BottleBlondeMachiavelli · 26/04/2025 06:19

What kind of hellish hard right education was that? A particularly bonkers convent school? Who shows explicit anti-abortion peopaganda footage to teens?

Many Roman Catholic secondaries do show films like this still. I escaped it as went to the girls grammar instead but my sister had to sit through it.

BottleBlondeMachiavelli · 26/04/2025 07:13

GrammarTeacher · 26/04/2025 07:11

Many Roman Catholic secondaries do show films like this still. I escaped it as went to the girls grammar instead but my sister had to sit through it.

That’s genuinely shocking. Maybe the only shocking thing on the thread.

lavenderandlemon · 26/04/2025 07:15

Sometimes class discussion takes you on a bit of a tangent, and for myself, if it's something that grabs the students' interest and has them engaged, I run with it for a bit before we get back on track - I would guess this is what happened here.

Side note, if anyone is interested in reading more about Victorian death culture, I really enjoyed Judith Flanders' book Rites of Passage - would recommend!

GrammarTeacher · 26/04/2025 07:15

BottleBlondeMachiavelli · 26/04/2025 07:13

That’s genuinely shocking. Maybe the only shocking thing on the thread.

Yup. Some of my sixth formers came from the local RC school - it doesn't have the impact the school want it to have!

MayaPinion · 26/04/2025 07:17

I went to a convent grammar school. We definitely had all the anti-abortion propaganda. We were even give these little feet pins for our lapels to signify our antiabortion stance at 11 years old!

We’ve all been glued to our televisions this week gawking at a dead pope in his open casket. It’s all around us, OP.

MrsCravensworth · 26/04/2025 07:17

BottleBlondeMachiavelli · 26/04/2025 06:19

What kind of hellish hard right education was that? A particularly bonkers convent school? Who shows explicit anti-abortion peopaganda footage to teens?

i had the abortion video too, year 9/10 I think. I was 13 ish.

And yes, it was a bonkers Catholic convent school. The nuns were doing rosary’s in the corner and praying while it was on.

We were also given little enamel feet badges to wear, the size of the feet of a 12 week foetus.

The worst thing was that one of the girls had actually had an abortion, due to being raped by a family member. The nuns made her sit right at the front and she sobbed the whole way through. Some of other kids (boys and girls, they had been forced to allow boys at the school a few years prior), were vile to her after wards and taunted her with the badges. The nuns and teachers did nothing to stop it, just let them carry on.

I was so upset for her that I told my father, who was livid and went to the school. The head teacher was a nun and told him that if he didn’t like it, to take me out of the school.

Fucking vile.

MrsCravensworth · 26/04/2025 07:18

MayaPinion · 26/04/2025 07:17

I went to a convent grammar school. We definitely had all the anti-abortion propaganda. We were even give these little feet pins for our lapels to signify our antiabortion stance at 11 years old!

We’ve all been glued to our televisions this week gawking at a dead pope in his open casket. It’s all around us, OP.

I think we must have gone to the same school! Can’t be many Catholic convent grammars!

IVFmumoftwo · 26/04/2025 07:21

I bet they have seen worse and you don't know it.

TheGaaTheSkaAndTheRa · 26/04/2025 07:22

whyiwonderwhy · 26/04/2025 00:10

It doesn't upset me at all, and the victorian photos of dead children don't upset me either. But the victorian photos are exactly as you describe - sitting them dressed as though alive - like a row of children with the dead child at the end propped up as though alive. Or two children hugging their dead mother but the mother is sat up with eyes open as though alive. So that is what I meant by slightly disturbing.

But as I said in the OP it was the "but why show these photos in that lesson" ie the wtf element to it which i very disturbing.

It just seems so weird to me to do that. It was the context. The photos were completely out of context

Some teachers like to shock as that is all they have. It's pathetic.

I'm old but I remember a supply teacher in the 70's and he pulled a few like this and he had 'sad git' written all over him. This sort of thing was all he had to his personality and we learned nothing from him but the fact that the teacher he was temporarily replacing was actually good at their job.

I would let it go. I don't have an issue with kids knowing that death is part of life but I agree with you, if this is the best he can come up with regarding the incredible Victorians, he's a sad sack.

hazelnutvanillalatte · 26/04/2025 07:24

We read The Yellow Wallpaper and Macbeth in y9 and saw the painting of Myra Hindley done in children's handprints.

The dark/edgy stuff is what engages students