Cooking related terms that make you squirm (title edited by MNHQ at request of OP)

[Words]

Sides. No. It is side dishes. See also mains (Shudder)

I made lamb at Easter. No, you cooked it.

Cooked to your liking. Well they woudn't deliberately cook it otherwise if they wanted to stay in business...

Dollop.

I can't find the poster or post where it's hated.
What a wonderful onomatopoeia though. Covers everything from a spoon of mayonnaise to having a shit.

Moving on...!

Has nobody mentioned coulis? Not even a raspberry one?
That was very Loyd Grossman Masterchef.

I very much like dollop. For all the reasons you suggest @GustyBaloo

Lloyd's was the best Masterchef!
So very civilised!

Yersss... Wellll...

Although his sauces have a lot to answer for. Actually they don't. I bought 3, they all tasted mouldy. I did something I never normally do and phoned Loyd's hotline!

The lady got me to read out a printed barcode on the jar and admitted that the garlic used 'wasn't from their usual supplier' (??) and it had been noted that all jars in that batch shouldn't have even been on the supermarket shelves.
The garlic was mouldy.

£25 and not a coulis in sight.

No dinner in sight either 🙄

🤣

Imagine cruising round the table with a jar of Hellmans at a dinner party...
(I'd have to imagine that, I have no table, I don't cruise, I don't hold dinner parties and I only have French mayonnaise)...

Dollop?

1 dollop or 2 dollops?

Whilst dolloping with a desert spoon aiming for the ultimate splat.

You don't get a dollop with the squeezy bottles. Just a farty noise.

I am so uncouth.

OMG ‘the ultimate splat’ …. Yuck, yuck, yuck!

My DH likes to watch MasterChef and they come up with such ridiculous names for things like chocolate Soil.
It doesn't really bother me but it makes me laugh when I see the phrase Freshly Cut sandwiches , like they might have been made for hours / days/ weeks but they've only just been cut!
And packets of apples in the supermarket which say "Ideal for eating". As opposed to what? What else would you do with an apple?

How! How do you fold the cheese.

Bung, Chuck and throw.

yum. Yummy. Nom. Scrummy

I've even seen on here - yumty yum.

FFS

”Piping hot”.

Just say hot.

American food influencers constantly describing food as 'addicting', it's not a word, it's addictive! And when they say they're going to 'do' something when they describe adding an ingredient ie "Now we're going to do a creamy ranch".

That whole sentence makes me on edge.

It's a good job you requested the single dollop.

Ooo I love that other people hate “plating up” too.
I regularly have to restrain myself from yelling you mean YOU'RE SERVING UP at DH. you’re not Gordon Ramsay love

We say dishing up.

When will dinner be ready? Just dishing it up now...

No bowls or dishes involved.

Any juvenile terminology:
Choccy
Veggie
Picky bits
Toms
Dippy eggs

Give me a break.

Also, coming from a true pita-eating nation, I also haaate it when people say or write "pitta" instead of "pita". And pronounce it "pit-tah" instead of "pee-ta".

Same goes for "hummus". Sorry to say, but I hate the way British people pronounce it (very wrongly).

I write pitta because what we buy are apparently called pitta breads.
I'm trying to attach a screenshot from Sainsburys, but I don't think it's uploading.

Nope not working. A quick Google should suffice.

Under review 🤣 Blummin hard work. I prefer Naan myself. Or is it Nan?

My 6 year old DGS says tarco’s rather than taco’s.

We do not know where he got it from. According to him, he is right we are wrong!

He must have the posh ones 🤣

I remember being shocked many years ago when DS thought the Co-op was in fact the Cow-OP! Accents can be a terrible thing!

I know, I was just in the UK over Easter and was horrified to see "pitta" in various supermarkets. I had to leave the bread aisles in annoyance 😈

Haven't rtft but I hate "posset" as a dessert, it's usually lemon posset but I can only think of a baby puking!
Agree "dirty" anything is unappetising.

Not the actual food but I get irrationally annoyed by menus who don't set out the price "properly"

Eg Dirty fries...........5.5 (5.5 what??)

Goodness me.

I sincerely hope you have recovered from such trauma.

I hear baby sick every time I hear posset too.

I don't care if it's lemon, or delicious. I shall just be thinking of slightly curdled baby puke.

Nom mom! 🤣 I meant to write nom nom as a wind up, but my typo seems more accurate in this instance!

@Words have you solved the ‘muddled’ mystery yet?

It’s usually used for drinks. So think mojito you muddle the mint and sugar with a muddler 😁

If I’m honest I kind of like muddled and muddler 😁