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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Resilience… things you’ve been through where you realise you have built so much more resilience than the average person

126 replies

ThiasTime · 18/04/2025 07:34

For me it’s having been a lone parent for the first two years of DD’s life. I had a c section and then three days later came home alone and just had to carry on. I had family support emotionally but nothing practically.

So many friends and family have had children since then and even the smallest thing can cause them to feel stressed or irritated or upset or tired. I have sympathy and always try my best not to let what I’ve been through stop me being compassionate… but the reality is that 95% of things people mention they struggle with with a newborn or small baby was really the tip of the iceberg for me when doing it all alone. Anyone else feel like this about experiences they’ve had?

OP posts:
TammyJones · 18/04/2025 11:54

TheAmusedQuail · 18/04/2025 08:02

Yes, I think I'm more resilient than others. I've been through and done a lot.

But as others have said, it does have a long term effect. I'm actually quite numb in my emotions now, and I think really, it's due to all the stresses I've had to deal with. I also tend to keep people at arms length now. When I was younger, I was very keen to create bonds with others, to share, and be very open and giving. I think it's pretty obvious to people I'm closer to that I don't give as much emotionally anymore. I feel a bit as if I've used all of my giving up, dealing with my life shit.

I find that I can’t cry.
maybe because I used up my quoter and I’m all cried out.
life is good and I’m happier than I’ve ever been but…At a cost.

Rosie8880 · 18/04/2025 11:59

MistressoftheDarkSide · 18/04/2025 10:27

I tell you something else.

Being applauded for my "resilience" makes me squirm. People mean well but the danger is that it can make one feel less inclined to be vulnerable when one needs to for fear of being judged.

My best and closest friends have helped me most by sitting with me in the dark, and letting me direct them as to the support I need.

Talking about resilience can leave one feeling under pressure of unrealistic expectations. Sometimes I am numb, sometimes the gentlest touch feels like a scald.

I have had my grief and struggles over-ridden by other people's grief, especially in regard to my late DP. It skews and hinders the process. It amplifies all the horrible painful feelings one has and adds bitterness into the mix, which has to be dealt with to prevent worse fallout. In my experience.

Sharing a burden is one thing, appropriating it is another.

It is all very complex.

Time and space sometimes turns into self defensive isolation.

It is exhausting, often defies logic, and sometimes survival is resilience in itself. But it's nit a badge of honour, it's a war wound.

Acknowledgement and solidarity are good objectives, imposed expectations are not, and that seems to be the new meaning of resilience. And I have issues with that.

Very beautifully articulated X

Compash · 18/04/2025 12:08

I agree totally about the body keeping score - I got through a parent's death and a cancer diagnosis at the same time, determined to be calm, strong, positive and, yes, resilient about it... I told hardly anyone about it and strove to 'take care of this myself' (DH useless anyway, but that's another story 🙄).

And when I'd got through that and started to release the tension of coping a bit, I was hit with an autoimmune disease. As someone mentioned above, 'all that cortisol has got to go somewhere...'.

After WW2, there was apparently an absolute epidemic of autoimmune disease. And that's not to mention the quiet mental illness, alcoholism, domestic violence etc that would have been brushed under the carpet back then... I think a lot of us here cope through a crisis because we have to, but it takes a toll afterwards.

Spinderella2 · 18/04/2025 12:11

user1471516498 · 18/04/2025 10:50

Resilience is funny though. In times of my life when things are very hard, I tend to shut down and go into survival mode. Some would call that resilience, but I wonder if it is just survival instinct. Then, once things have calmed down, my resilience breaks down and every little thing affects me. Am I just a weak person, or is this also a survival instinct, as it is unhealthy to stay in survival mode for too long?

It’s normal.

Spinderella2 · 18/04/2025 12:13

I know it’s a cliche but exercise really helps reduce stress hormones. Not saying it’s a cure just helps. When DH left me walking miles helped.

SlagPit · 18/04/2025 12:13

You cope because you have to, not because you're "strong". There isn't another choice.

Songbird54321 · 18/04/2025 12:14

I had a lovely childhood, I have lots of people around me and probably what a lot of people would see as the ideal life.
With both of my children I had hyperemesis, pre and post natal depression whilst my dad was diagnosed with what is going to be a long snd terminal illness. It was the most horrific time of my life. What made it worse is that it’s meant to be the happiest time, so I felt, in part because of people like you OP, that I couldn’t say anything because ‘they had it worse’.
I don’t think competition over whose lives are harder is useful at all.
Different people have very different limits with different things.

user499978802 · 18/04/2025 12:16

What is 'the average person' though? If you met me, you'd think lovely house, lovely husband, lovely kids, no financial problems.

But you'd never know that I witnessed the accidental death of a sibling at an age where I was old enough to know what happened, but too young to understand, followed by years of being raised by parents who were devastated and emotionally shut down. A short first marriage to a sex-addicted serial cheater. Two international moves with a young family. Years of balancing an extremely high stress career with three young DC while DH did the same. The life-threatening illness, near death and gruelling treatment endured by of one of my kids.

But if you met me, you'd think I'd never had reason to need resilience. Most people, do not, in the end, curl up in the foetal position and give up when life gets tough, they keep on putting one foot in front of the other.

It's not a competition, and, if you ask me, asking for, and accepting help is just as great a strength as gritting your teeth and coping.

starrynight009 · 18/04/2025 12:33

I was sexually abused by my biological father, my mum had quite bad mental health issues, I was in a short unhappy marriage with a man who was abusive, then my second partner abandoned me whilst I was pregnant so I found myself a lone parent for many years. I nearly died of severe sepsis whilst giving birth. My daughter was born with a medical condition and had 4 operations when she was a baby and things are still ongoing. I had skin cancer and have a scar on my face..I'm sure there's probably more!

On the other hand I love motherhood, I am now in a very happy relationship, I went to University as a mature student and loved it, I managed to travel to many countries in my 20s, I enjoy my job, I have lovely friends...so things have turned out okay because I've never let the bad stuff stop me.

I think I am pretty resilient. I honestly couldn't tell you how I bounce back but I do seem to manage to. I work for an international charity where I hear about people going through things I can't even imagine so that sort of puts things into perspective for me.

I do sometimes find it hard listening to people being dramatic about minor things or people talking about their traumas which don't sound very traumatic to me. Or yes, two parents moaning about how tired they are when I'm there doing it all by myself....but I don't say anything. I just make sympathetic noises. It isn't a competition after all. We all walk our own paths and struggle with different things.

BlackCoal · 18/04/2025 12:33

arcticpandas · 18/04/2025 09:16

I should have more resilience on the paper if you looked on my childhood experiences but unfortunately I've just come out as a more broken, anxious and cynical person (although empathetic) than I would have been without those experiences. When I compare my reactions to my friends who got happy upbringings I can see how they can stay in a cool analytical mode while dealing with hardships whether I freeze or break down inside (while trying to maintain a cool composure to the outside world). So no, bad experiences have not brought anything positive into my life.

I found myself nodding in agreement at your post. Yes! I feel exactly the same way. My trauma response is to freeze, I literally shut down with any type of stress and go into myself and my brain switches off. The people around me don't understand why I can't deal with in their opinion, minor issues, but a life of neglect and abuse starting in childhood, has left me with a faulty wired brain.

LoveSandbanks · 18/04/2025 12:55

I’ve been to some very dark, low places and when I was there it was the trivial things I moaned about, constantly. The big things were just too big to articulate.

human beings shouldn’t need vast swathes of resilience we need support, compassion and love.

Spinderella2 · 18/04/2025 12:56

@arcticpandas same here it’s almost emotionally stunted me. Not saying that’s what has happened for you.

ForFunGoose · 18/04/2025 13:14

ScaryM0nster · 18/04/2025 10:54

You clearly learned no compassion from your experience.

Some people find managing some things much harder than others.

Compassion and recognising that people are different is evidently something you find harder to manage than many others do.

I didn’t learn compassion from my experience either . Not through choice it just didn’t happen and if it had I think life would be easier.

honeylulu · 18/04/2025 13:16

MsBette · 18/04/2025 07:43

Ive been through a lot OP.

I could probably pat myself on the back and tell you how resilient I am. I’ve handled it all, by myself. I’m sure some of my friends have had it “easier “. How would I know though? Maybe the little things they are stressed about is the tip of their iceberg too.

But as they say, the body keeps the score. I’m now in my 50’s and treating myself to some therapy, because the weight of all that resilience is something I’d quite like to put down now.

This is such a good post, very grounding.

I have fallen into the trap of comparing myself to "average" people and rolling my eyes at what they find stressful. Between my two children I had a stillbirth and multiple miscarriages. I've been pregnant 11 times (once with twins) to get my two children. I had so many miscarriages that I stopped taking time off work, would feel the cramps, go to the toilet and miscarry, back to work at my desk. I do feel shocked (unfairly) sometimes when I see colleagues having 3 weeks off following an early miscarriage. But then I have to give my head a wobble. Plus I'm sure people who had 11 pregnancies and ended up with no children would think i had nothing to moan about!

I do feel it made me resilient but like the poster I quoted it damaged me in other ways. I'm quite tough and hard these days and very cynical. Greater resilience can take other things from you.

I also remind myself that I didn't decide or choose to become more resilient and it wasn't a natural quality of mine. I just had to develop it by default to survive what I went through and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

What stresses and upsets people is real and valid to them, even if it seems "mountains out of molehills" to you and me.

Resilience · 18/04/2025 13:46

Resilience is a funny thing. Sometimes you can posses more of it than at other times and there’s ways a finite element to it where something gives - be that your ability to cope or maybe even just your ability to take enjoyment and ‘feel’.

I’ve weathered umpteen bereavements, becoming homeless with 4-month-old twins when my then partner tried to strangle me and I left him, being a single parent to those twins and building a new life and career on my own. I’ve also done a job that itself exposed me to high levels of trauma. I survived it. Sometimes remarkably easy. Sometimes by the skin of my teeth with a feeling that I wasn’t going to make it.

I’ve learned many things as a result:
The impact of a happy and loving childhood cannot be underestimated. We were dirt poor and I lost my mum young but I was cherished and encouraged to fly at every step. That gave me a foundation of resilience because knowing you are loved does that.

Not everyone has that solid foundation and it puts them on the back foot straight away. Recognise that when some people appear particularly fragile.

You cannot be resilient alone. I’ve lost 99% of my family now but I have friends I’d cross continents and walk over hot coals to support if they needed me. Just like they have for me. I could not have got through the early years without their support. Many of them weren’t better off than me at the time but they listened and encouraged me to keep going and that’s priceless

Time is a healer in the sense that you need time to recover from one knock back before you can cope with the next. When my DC were about 4 I’d suffered a number of calamities - none of them that major in comparison to other things I’d been through - but because they’d come in quick succession I’d used up my ‘bank’ of resilience and nearly went under. The saying ‘the straw that broke the camel’s back’ illustrates this. I remember that when people melt down about something seemingly insignificant.

I remember the kindnesses people showed me when I was low and vulnerable very keenly. To this day I try to pay it forward. Why be horrible if you can be kind? It’s perfectly possible to tell someone they’re fucking up badly in a kind way with supportive advice about how to approach things differently. Although I’d never offer unsolicited advice.

Never, ever, take things for granted. Lives can fall apart in seconds so hold on to what you value with every effort you can. Enough can go wrong outside your control without increasing the odds by not making people/roles you care about feel valued.

Learn to appreciate the little things. Sometimes there isn’t much good but being able to take enjoyment from a nice cup of hot chocolate on a rainy day raises a smile and little things like that can really help your overall mental state. These days I think they call it mindfulness.

Always try to consider things from someone else’s point of view. There’s always a reason if you look hard enough. You may not agree with it but looking for it not only makes you a far nicer and empathetic person, it also makes you a better judge of character.

Go to bed every night thinking about the things you can be grateful about. It helps you sleep better and tiredness makes everything harder.

I guess real resilience is the ability to go through shit and still have the ability to be happy. I’m fortunate enough to be in that situation. My DC are grown up, doing well and we have a great relationship. I’m very happily remarried, I still have those amazing friends and a few more, I have a job I love and have managed to treble my salary in the last 15 years.

However, I recognise that a lot of that is down to luck not hard work and it makes me feel very appreciative.

To everyone who has been through it 💐

Neemie · 18/04/2025 15:22

By the time you have lived for a bit, I think very few people have had an easy life. Bad things happening to people can make them more vulnerable, not more resilient. That is why nasty, exploitative people swoop in to take advantage.

EilonwyWithRedGoldHair · 18/04/2025 15:42

I don't know, is it resilience or just no choice? Before we married DH was very ill, came close to dying until it was figured out what was wrong and the appropriate medication started. It's a life long condition, if he ever stops taking his medication he could be dead within days. It was awful being in the middle of him being so ill, but what can you do except carry on.

Same with DS being autistic. We've been through difficult times - at one point he was having multiple violent meltdowns a day, EBSA, no sleep... but what can you do except keep putting one foot in front of the other?

Now I have redundancy looming, and need to ideally find a job that pays enough to cover all the bills and fits around DS's needs like my current one has. Losing a fantastically supportive employer is going to be a huge blow to us.

I'm not sure it's resilience that has kept me going. Probably more stubbornness on my part than resilience.

WaveChaser · 18/04/2025 16:09

I have two very unwell children (one of those has SEN on top). I went through a stage of finding class WhatsApps quite tricky to relate to over what I saw as other parents non-issues at the time.

But then I had to remind myself how could they ever understand what I was going through/my children unless they experienced it themselves. I did have to bite my tongue on the 'advice' I received from said parents...

missdeamenor · 18/04/2025 16:32

I've had abuse, suicide, bereavement, mental illness etc,. but I don't think it's made me more resilient. I cannot cry any more and don't show my feelings, so people think I'm strong. I just suffer quietly at home whilst the world goes by outside.

Mintygreenleaf · 18/04/2025 17:46

@Anonym00se Thanks so much for taking the time to post details. Interesting perspective on CBT I can see what you mean (I have no experience of it just had read it was evidence based) My experience is minor compared to yours. I’d like not for a minor event sending me right back there though. Although it’s an internal reaction in the moment it does impact my behaviour, not positively either! Maybe it’s trial and error. Thank you I appreciate your reply x

4timesthefun · 18/04/2025 23:34

I definitely think resilience can be a double edged sword. While I’ve experienced severe trauma and adversity, particularly as a young person, I was also quite lucky in other ways. For example, I was always highly academic, so it didn’t matter if I was too sore from physical and sexual abuse to go to school, I could skate through whether I went to class or not. That luck saved me more than resilience, as it meant I wasn’t severely abused AND being unable to pass high school. From the outside, I’d look very high functioning, but no one would have any clue if I was resilient or not, as there is no one in my life (other than my husband) that knows the hell I came from. Luckily, PTSD treatment really helped me in my early twenties, so I don’t have any ongoing mental health problems.

It might seem like a good news story, but PP’s are right when they say the body keeps the score. I really need to read that book! I haven’t even turned 40 and I have problems such as a consistently (and significantly) elevated heart rate, high blood pressure, a seeming inability to absorb nutrients from food, and various other subtle health problems like almost no REM sleep. This is despite being active, and eating well. I had some cortisol type testing done and the GP said it was off the charts. I appear healthy from the outside and feel generally healthy, but internally, my system is anything but. I think this can be the flip side of resilience.

Severe stress and trauma takes a toll. Rather than necessarily being more resilient, the very ‘high functioning’ people I know just have a better ability to compartmentalize, which was often their trauma coping strategy. I think we celebrate this way too much in society. I was doing a clinical psychology course when my sibling went missing and their body was found. I just got on with my studies, amongst everything else. I remember one of the lecturers calling me into their office after they finished marking essays and they told me how impressed they were that I submitted on time without asking for an extension, as so many others in my cohort weren’t able to cope with the deadlines without complaining and needing special considerations. I was pretty chuffed with myself at the time, but as I look back now, a psychology professor probably should have seen it as the red flag it was! Realistically, those ‘complainers’ that needed extra time to sort out whatever was happening in their life are probably the more resilient ones in the long term, at least physically!

I don’t actually think I’m more resilient than most people. I just think we all have different coping mechanisms and capacities, and while some coping mechanisms may get societal praise, there can be an invisible danger to this. I’ll hardly be surprised if I suffer a heart attack in my 40’s at this rate. As PP’s have said, the cortisol has to go somewhere if you don’t let it out!

TorroFerney · 19/04/2025 09:31

NoWeaponsOnTheTable · 18/04/2025 08:00

It is all relative and rather if you look down on others who haven't had it as hard as you.
Where does it stop? Stop complaining you got groped because I've been raped? This is really how it comes over.
I am envious of some situations of friends but the reality is that everyone has their troubles whether you see them or not and you cannot make any sort of comparison without being privy to all the background.

This is very true. Thus is not resilience, resilience does not mean feeling superior to others and looking down on them.

Stillearninglife · 19/04/2025 09:42

Ha! Not resilience more “wow! How the fuck did I come out the other end of all that?!” So for me it’s survival!

I still am amazed that I’m still standing and functioning in normal life after the spanner’s in my works over the years!

Quite an accomplishment if I’m honest!

That’s what fascinates me, not comparison at all, more what happened to people and how they got to where they are after the event/s, people are fucking amazing to me.

Lighteningstrikes · 19/04/2025 09:51

@ThiasTime
It’s all subjective and with respect, what you have been through is very low level compared to me and a lot of people on here.

UnderHisEeyore · 19/04/2025 09:58

I was also a c-section lone parent and have been for over a decade now, no family to help at all.
I've been through all of the usual sicknesses solo (DC and my own).
Operations, exams, financial issues, building works, holidays, funerals, legal paperwork - all solo and planned by me alone. I have to admit I often feel quite pleased with myself for this, but in reality no one actually cares and it certainly hasn't helped me find a job!