To think most people who stay “friends” with exes are emotionally unfaithful?

54 replies

ThatPeachLemur · 15/04/2025 19:55

It’s not maturity - it’s a backup plan.

OP posts:

BangersAndGnash · 15/04/2025 23:19

ThatPeachLemur · 15/04/2025 20:06

I’m not saying every single person who’s friends with an ex is being shady but let’s not pretend it’s never emotionally complicated. The idea that there’s a totally clean break and zero lingering connection ever, especially when someone keeps that person around in their inner circle, does raise questions for some people.

It’s not about jealousy, it’s about boundaries. And yes, people have pasts but if your ex is still part of your present, then it’s fair to ask how that impacts your current relationship.

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None of that makes sense to me.

Veggielepsy · 15/04/2025 23:26

Why? I'd have zero interest in getting back with any of my exes but am friends with two. There are boundaries in place, we wouldn't have sleepovers or send any photos or messages we wouldn't share with partners, and don't spend

Veggielepsy · 15/04/2025 23:28

Sorry, *don't spend ages texting. Why can't a relationship move onto something different? These are people I've known for years. One is married and the other has a partner and baby. Both have met my partner.

EBearhug · 16/04/2025 00:21

I'dbe far more concerned about someone who by my age (50s) had a string of "mad exes" that they don't speak to (because of thd restraining irders) than someone who is still friends.

I've been with some lovely men in my time. The fact it didn't work out doesn't mean we have absolutely nothing in common. I might tell one of them about an exhibition or radio programme that might interest them, or a piece of news about a mutual acquaintance, or to ask them a question about an area of knowledge I know they have more expertise about than I do. I do that sort of thing with friends who aren't exes, too.

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