To be fed up of being on a good income but always skint?

[Justonemorecurlywurly]

I know I’m going to get flamed, lots of “boo-hoo, poor you”, and that there are people far worse off but -

Our household income (family of 4) is roughly £110-120k. DH earns about £100k of that, I’m self employed and part time so my income fluctuates. I think that’s pretty good money but it feels like we can never afford to do anything.

No holiday for 2 years.
1 car
Very few clothes
Modest house

If after paying bills, we ever buy something non-essential like a meal out, or maybe one or two items of new clothes, birthday present, that’s it, we’re out of money for the month. And we have no savings. It’s ridiculous!

We did try to move a few years back but couldn’t afford it so remortgaged instead to extend the house a little. We got the best deal we could and borrowed only as much as we were comfortable with (even though it meant we couldn’t do as much work as we needed). But unfortunately we made a mistake fixing the new mortgage for only two years and when that time was up, rates had shot to which has made our repayments considerably more expensive which really hasn’t helped.

I’m so fed up of it. I honestly feel like we felt so much better off about 10 years ago when we were earning A LOT less.

Does anyone else feel like this? Is it just that everything is so expensive now??

I know some people will say I should work full time but for reasons I won’t go into, I need to be available for my DC so me being p/t works much better for the whole family.

@QuickTyper

You said you have prioritised your expensive house over holidays, car, eating out etc. There’s your answer then! So no, I don’t feel sorry for you.

I know how you feel, my wages are nowhere near as high- between us we bring in somewhere between £50,000.00- £60,000.00 a year before tax, however we have a very low mortgage and very low energy bills and no childcare costs, so I would expect to be better off but I feel like we are working constantly with no pay off.
We got caught in a bit of a debt cycle when I was on my (terrible) mat leave and then working part time and we can't seem to get out of it even though our wages have gone up a lot since then.

Every month something hits, if we do one thing- one night out, one day out with kids it throws off the whole month- a few months ago I actually had to collect food on a free food app 2 days before pay day because I didn't have one penny left- it's horrible.

Exactly! Our mortgage is £2200 a month, council tax £320, gas and electric - £250, water -£60, food shop -£500-£600 a month etc. So when were on £5K we really struggled if we had any extra expenses, but after I got a new job and hubby also got a hike things have become a lot better.

You need to write down a full
breakdown of your expenses. Something isn’t quite adding up @Justonemorecurlywurly . You need to work more hours, it’s a luxury to be be self
emoloyed and bring in 7-20k. What would happen if your husband lost his job and your bringing in such a low income ?

You need to review what you are spending on.

i earn £35k, i have a 2 week foreign holiday booked in school hols, several camping trips and another week booked abroad in May half term. I pay and mortgage and run an (old) car.

you are earning way way more than me but pleading poverty.

you are either frittering it away or splashing out on things you can be more economical with. Examples I see in friends who spend more are

ill preparation for days out so spend a fortune on food and drinks rather than bringing a picnic

no shopping for deals on car insurance etc renewals are just paid

lights left on jn rooms not used. Walking round in a t shirt and putting heating on etc.

thinking they ‘need’ to drink a few bottles of wine a weekend, that can be £80 a month easily.

You need a root and branch check of you spending habits as they are obviously too much if you can’t afford a holiday etc on that income

@Stresshead84x

are your debt repayments manageable? Could you negotiate a different repayment so that you won’t run out of money for food? Or perhaps move so it’s 0%APR.

How do you get a foreign summer holiday on that salary? Where do you go, where do you stay?

I sat on the tui app (and yes other holiday providers are available) to see 2 week family holidays in Spain or Greece at £8, 10k. I have a friend who is a travel agency and I asked her to look for me and she said £1500 per person wasn’t a realistic expectation. I pay for 4 people to go on holiday.

on £35k you’re taking home under £2.5k per month. How can you afford this? How many people are on your 2 week summer holiday?

Pointing out the obvious but paying £2500 on mortgage, council tax and utilities is most of the reason.

If you want more money left at the end of the month then move to a cheaper area and or smaller 3bed.

@Happilyobtuse I appreciate mortgage rates have gone up but you would have chose your house in a particular area etc and paid a premium for it, so your mortgage cost (aside from interest rates) are hardly outside your control? We all have a salary and make some choices on how to spend it and have to cut our cloth accordingly.

Never go through a travel agency. Book it yourself.

I just went on booking com there and had a quick look.

You can get an apartment in Spain, that fits a family of four, for two weeks, for 400 euro total. Thats four hundred euro for two weeks

No one anywhere pays 8000 euro for a two week trip to Spain.

Move to a more reasonably priced area? Assuming you live in London or another major city? (But happy to be corrected if I’m wrong)
I live in a lovely area. In a very nice traditional 3 bed property. My mortgage repayments are £800 per month.

That’s an apartment (I dread to think how bad it’ll be but let’s put that to one side) so I’m self catering and have no flights. That’s not a holiday.

Eurocamp is offering stays in Picardy starting 26th July at £652 per week for a party of four.

As for £1500 per person being unrealistic, we're managing a 5 night Disney cruise in August for under £1500 per person, booking early.

How long do you think it will take for that to be a financially beneficial move after allowing for stamp duty, moving and legal fees, mortgage attainment and the increased interest rate- or worse, The mortgage break clause? Mine is currently 40k.
I suspect that alone makes that a move to a 3 bed more expensive than my current situation for at least 2.5 years I reckon

@AquaPeerif this ‘isn’t a holiday’ for you, then yes, you will be paying more for a hotel/all inclusive/etc. Again, it’s a choice and you are choosing a ‘better’ holiday and will pay the price for that.

That isn’t what I was imagining by 2 week foreign sunny holiday.

if the poster who afford all these holidays on £35k means “the cheapest holiday I can get” than maybe she should say that. And realise that not other people don’t want any old holiday, they want a holiday they want

That’s very obvious but I was wondering what holiday @Temporaryname158 was referring too as she was eager to say she holidays multiple times a year including a summer foreign holiday plus pays for all her living expenses on £35k

The apartment is very nice. It has a balcony.

Self catering is not a holiday? Well just because meals are not included, doesn't mean you have to cook for yourself. You can go out to a restaurant for dinner cant you? Again, this is extremely cheap in Spain.

Every holiday that I've ever went on was self catering.

It makes me laugh when people say "oh I can't afford a holiday abroad",

Then they dismiss all the sensible cheap options of holidays abroad.

You can afford a holiday abroad.

You just cant afford a five star all inclusive hotel abroad, for two weeks. Nobody that I know goes to a five star all inclusive hotel. We either get cheaper hotels. Or we book an apartment abroad for a week

No, not that self catering isn’t holiday

an apartment in Spain isn’t a holiday. The holiday includes the costs of flying there and spending money. Me booking a €400 flat for 2 weeks doesn’t make a holiday

I think she's saying that she couldn't possibly stoop to going on the kind of holidays that us commoners enjoy and that on her superior salary she should be shielded from the impacts of the cost of living crisis and free to fritter money on whatever extravagances she chooses, while public services decay due to insufficient investment and us commoners struggle to put food on the table - after all if we had just made better choices in life we would also be able to swan about in five star all inclusive resorts. I assume that's kind of what she's really saying anyway.

On All holidays, you have to pay the cost of flying there, and spending money though?

What do you want in a holiday?

I’m not sure why you’re asking me these questions- I can afford the holiday I want. I asked the poster above on £35k what sort of holidays she so easily afforded that meant she couldn’t understand people who can’t afford one.

you (I assume) then bounced in saying you’d found a holiday apartment for €400. When I said that wasn’t a holiday you posted a big lecture on different people different holidays. I simply meant it wasn’t a holiday because it was missing at least £800 for everyone to fly there and the spending money. So I wasn’t really sure why you were trying to find an apartment for €400 and what the relevance was

If you can't imagine holidays outside your own (very narrow) definition you probably need to open your eyes a little more as to how the other half live.

Financially literate people of all income levels cut their cloth accordingly, rather than convince themselves that they are entitled to something then moan they cannot afford it (or put it on the never-never).

You said to the poster earning 35k "how can you afford a holiday on that salary".

Which is ridiculous.

A lot of people in the UK earn less than 35k.

I earn 25k , and I go on holiday every year.

Yes I can afford flights , spending money and accommodation for two weeks

What family issues, and how old are your children? Even part timers can earn more than £20k.