Leaving 15 week old

[Zoobabies]

We go away every year with a couple of close friends for the weekend however this year I have a 15 week old baby which I will be leaving for the first time overnight with grandparents.

The friends wanted to set off early morning and I requested that we leave two hours later to give me time to sort LG and do handover to grandparents. The room could not be checked till 3 pm and we will be there well before that even leaving at my time.

They refused and stated that they wanted to make a day of it drinking, and if we wanted to leave later to do the three hour drive ourselves and meet them there bearing in mind we have driven the last two years running, am I being unreasonable to be upset and hurt that they think more of an extra couple of hours drinking than us as friends and our LG?

If they had wanted to leave late evening to accommodate their children, even if I didn’t like it, I still would have agreed because their kids mean the world to me and there needs to come first.

How often have the grandparents looked after the baby on their own and for how long?
Going for a weekend break sounds lovely, but to not take your own car and to go drinking sounds a bit careless. Also 3 hours a way is quite a trek should something happen.
I don't think your friends are being unfair, they want the most of their weekend, but you need to consider your family now too and what suits them best.

Do you want to go on this break? Part of me wonders if your snide comments to people are a case of being over defensive.

How much time has your baby spent with grandparents before?

In the gentlest way possible: leaving such a tiny baby for a weekend to go drinking is very soon. You would also be a long way away should something happen.

Your friends should be accommodating for you,but I also think you are being quite naive thinking this arrangement can work.

they wanted to make a day of it drinking, and if we wanted to leave later to do the three hour drive ourselves and meet them there

Sounds more than reasonable.

I’m not sure why you’re getting such a hard time here OP. I can see you reacted to posters claiming you were “unreasonable to leave a 15 week old baby alone so you can go boozing“ and that your baby was not your priority. Both of those comments are deeply unpleasant and unnecessary and most people would take offense to them especially when your question wasn’t actually about leaving your baby.

I can see why you’re pissed off at your friends but this could be a blessing in disguise just in case you do need to leave early you won’t be tied to their schedule or be forced to cut short their holiday. Maybe suggest that from next year, when your baby is older that you go back to the original travel arrangement.

What a stupid comment! Babies need to sleep with the caregiver for the first six months what do you think happens with babies that don’t have a mother?

Thank you for your sensible comments.

I bite back at some nasty comments and I am the bad guy, when you’re right I didn’t ask for anyone’s opinion on leaving my child just the situation.

and the time has now been and gone this is an old post.

You missed out the word primary. Primary caregiver.
Who is that for your LO?
A person who prioritises a boozy sesh with mates over the needs of a 15 week old.
Well done, hope it was worth it 🤭

Excellent point.