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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think people who drive through an amber light are dicks...

27 replies

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:07

...when they can see people waiting (in the opposite direction) to turn right?

Especially at busy junctions with fast changing lights.

You can see people ahead of you waiting for the stream of traffic to stop so they can complete their manoeuvre but you decide that you (as a dickhead who was tenth in the queue) gets priority.

I KNOW that legally you have right of way, but it's still dickish. AIBU?

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 28/03/2025 22:10

Where I live , if you don;t go through an amber light the dickhead behind you will rear end you .

I know it's the driver at the back that bears responsibility but it;s my back that would be knackered !

Ponoka7 · 28/03/2025 22:11

If it's legal to do so, you should keep the flow of traffic going. As a pedestrian, I'm aware of were to cross, so the traffic is having to slow down, at safe points. There's so many drivers these days not driving with due care and attention, you could easily get rear-ended.

pointythings · 28/03/2025 22:15

It isn't that simple. As a driver, you have to decide whether it is safe for you to brake to a stop when the light changes from green to amber, or not. Sometimes it will be, sometimes it won't.

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:17

To clarify, not when it's JUST gone amber but after it has. Like at a point where as a driver I would have had the opportunity to stop. This is a 20mph speed zone, it's not a safety issue

OP posts:
AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:19

I mean, if it was such a hazard to get rear ended then everyone stopping to turn right would have been blown into space at this point

OP posts:
LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 28/03/2025 22:20

Well sometimes you end up growing through amber as it changes before you have time to stop. That’s the point of amber, a transition period,

pointythings · 28/03/2025 22:21

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:17

To clarify, not when it's JUST gone amber but after it has. Like at a point where as a driver I would have had the opportunity to stop. This is a 20mph speed zone, it's not a safety issue

Even then it's going to depend on the situation. I live in the Land of Tailgaters.

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:21

If it turns to Amber as you pass then you're not a dick in my book. But if it's already amber and has been for a few seconds and you saunter through when people are waiting then that's totally dickish. Especially if you're travelling under 20mph. At least be a quick dick if you're gonna be one

OP posts:
MasterBeth · 28/03/2025 22:21

The amber light is there so you have no excuse for going through on red. It's fine to go through on amber.

Treesarenotforeating · 28/03/2025 22:23

Round here it’s fairly normal for cars ( taxis) to go through on red

Starfishfriend · 28/03/2025 22:23

but you decide that you (as a dickhead who was tenth in the queue) gets priority.
I KNOW that legally you have right of way, but it's still dickish. AIBU?

youve contradicted yourself. It’s not them ‘as a dickhead deciding they have priority’ is it. It’s the law.
also it’s dangerous to not go when it’s your right of way because people behind you (rightly or wrongly..another debate) won’t be expecting you to stop.

Twotoast · 28/03/2025 22:24

Hm there is plenty of dickish moves people do on the road but don't think this is one of them

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:25

Starfishfriend · 28/03/2025 22:23

but you decide that you (as a dickhead who was tenth in the queue) gets priority.
I KNOW that legally you have right of way, but it's still dickish. AIBU?

youve contradicted yourself. It’s not them ‘as a dickhead deciding they have priority’ is it. It’s the law.
also it’s dangerous to not go when it’s your right of way because people behind you (rightly or wrongly..another debate) won’t be expecting you to stop.

If you don't suddenly stop I don't see how there's much risk of being tailgated. Say if the light changed to Amber for 2 cars ahead of you and you decelerate gradually accordingly. Rather than deciding to chance it at the last second, which forces the poor sod at the box in the junction to complete their manoeuvre when it's gone to red

OP posts:
TheFatCatsWhiskers1 · 28/03/2025 22:26

I know what you mean OP, it's like this at the junction near me. I've had it with bikes going through amber or red lights too, up a hill at about 3 mph so I can't turn right.

I'm struggling to understand how not going through an amber light would put you at risk of being rear ended. The person behind you should be aware of what the lights are doing. If they're not then you're just as likely to be rear ended when you stop at a red light.

Dbank · 28/03/2025 22:29

Just follow the Highway Code, you can still drive over the line on amber.

It's the twats that drive through on red, which is becoming increasingly popular in London.

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:31

Good point on people driving through on red lights. I feel there's less monitoring of overall driving standards these days. Don't get me started on twats who drive in the middle of the fucking road

OP posts:
TheFatCatsWhiskers1 · 28/03/2025 22:34

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:31

Good point on people driving through on red lights. I feel there's less monitoring of overall driving standards these days. Don't get me started on twats who drive in the middle of the fucking road

I live next to a four way junction. I've seen all sorts.

The driving down the middle of the road thing drives me crazy. On the plus side I've become very skilled at manoeuvring through tight spaces.

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:40

Love it when I stop for a middle of a road driver only for them to not even acknowledge me moving out the way for them. No, no it's fine you went on my side of the road because you have no spacial awareness and decided to buy a fucking tank to drive down old winding city streets in

OP posts:
AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:42

Is it too late to convert this thread into AIBU TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR TOP DRIVING GRIPES?

I appreciate everyone's perspectives on amber lights, I can have more empathy now for the people who are frightened of being rear ended or who have a very rigid understanding of the highway code. I will no longer curse you under my breath (unless you're very very cheeky)

OP posts:
TheFatCatsWhiskers1 · 28/03/2025 22:46

I'm pretty sure the highway code says that amber means stop, not speed up.

Tiredallthetimeneedsleep · 28/03/2025 23:22

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 28/03/2025 22:20

Well sometimes you end up growing through amber as it changes before you have time to stop. That’s the point of amber, a transition period,

I thought amber meant stop ( if safe to do so ) at least that is what it was when I took my driving test many moons ago. Maybe it's changed but no one told me ....

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 29/03/2025 00:52

AgingLikeGazpacho · 28/03/2025 22:42

Is it too late to convert this thread into AIBU TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR TOP DRIVING GRIPES?

I appreciate everyone's perspectives on amber lights, I can have more empathy now for the people who are frightened of being rear ended or who have a very rigid understanding of the highway code. I will no longer curse you under my breath (unless you're very very cheeky)

Edited

Wink but I'll still know you;re cursing me .
I;ll sense it and you;ll think I wonder if that old bat can lipread ?

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 29/03/2025 00:56

On a serious note though -
I've been giving my DS driving tips ( or bending his ear as he calls it ) but there are junctions where I have to go across a busy A Road and wait to turn
I tell him to "read the road" and even though you have a green light, if the junction is backing up with cars , if there's no-where for you to go forward then hang on a second . The lights will change and you don;t want to be the driver that blocks the other cars that are crossing the other way .
(And give the evil eye to the tit behind who thinks they know better )

Edited - tit behind , not tot . They don't let tots drive . Can't see over the steering wheel

UnchainMeSister · 29/03/2025 01:00

I go through as long as it's not red when I do so. There's an absolute bollockload of traffic lights where I live so no one messes around when they can go.

Bejinxed · 29/03/2025 11:21

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 28/03/2025 22:10

Where I live , if you don;t go through an amber light the dickhead behind you will rear end you .

I know it's the driver at the back that bears responsibility but it;s my back that would be knackered !

This. I stopped at an amber light and got rear ended by a lorry. Car written off. I’m not risking it again.