Is it cheap not to cater?

[Itrtttyy]

it’s a significant birthday and a function room is being hired out 4-6pm for around 40 guests then afterwards carrying on in nearby (nice) pubs. The function room place serves food as do a few nearby pubs.

Does the event need catered (a buffet)?

Yes - YABU
No - YANBU

Okay. I cannot continue to repeatedly explain that I wanted opinions on the buffet. Of course I will defend my friend to unjustified attacks.

Thank you to the few posters who grasped and answered the question, and to those who voted overwhelmingly to say there should be a buffet.

It was a very valid response and although I'm on your side not just with your question but with the fact that a lot of poaters are going 'off the point', I also think your response to it was rude.

That poster had taken time to write that in response to your thread and you don't have to read it but you could've just not commented rather than responding with what is essentially 'Yeh I know you've written a lot for my benefit but I'm too important/busy/lazy to read it'.

FWIW,and I have responded already, I think the party organiser is missing a point that yes, her friends might be the 'out on the town' types who don't necessarily live for food being at a party for sustenance but it is misguided to not provide it because food isn't just for the gluttonous or more reserved people who don't drink, to feel that it is a party. It sparks conversation, gets the mood up, stops people from being nervous and drinking too much, gives people a focus and is something to look at that isn't one another. It is a basic addition to a gathering and its merits go back years. She should provide something, even crisps nuts and sausage rolls would be better than absolutely zilch.

I hope you all have a great night anyway and I will be Interested to know how things go. .

Provided drinks as opposed to a pay bar

The opening lines were that she didn’t understand and I was very defensive. She wasn’t commenting for my benefit, especially if she didn’t understand.

Only if you are going to buy food at one of the pubs, otherwise you should cater at the function room. There's nothing worse than going to a party with no food or drinks!

Provide nibbles, one drink, water, birthday cake and approx two slices of pizza each... Have the candles, sing happy birthday and then roll off to the rest of the evening.

It's better to start with some food before going on a pub crawl.

You can't be serious, surely

Yes there should be a buffet to answer your AIBU

4-6 is an odd time to meet up for a night out so I would either come for one drink, wish her well then go on with my night or I would meet up later probably after being for a meal

Ordering food when some people are eating and some are not, then those not eating head off to the next pub sounds like a bit of a shambles to me.

And to answer one of the OPs previous question no I can’t think of a time where some of my friends would eat food in the pub while others don’t, if we meet up it’s either for a meal itself or just drinks.

Defend your “friend” who you have repeatedly called cheap and tight throughout this thread?

Also there’s clearly no friend, it’s your birthday.

Okay, whatever, I concede. You’re right. It’s my birthday and I think there should be a buffet on so have started a thread saying there isn’t going to be one, because I’m not putting one on, when the point of this thread is that I think there should be one, but I won’t do one, and on we go.

There isn’t much I can do about the hard of thinking, so if it gives some sense of pleasure to believe you’ve rumbled me, then I can bear that cross.

Of course there should be a buffet, it wouldn't need to be a lot at that time of day. It's rather rude to invite people to celebrate her birthday, expecting some to not stay late, and not provide any food. Of course people can get food in some of the pubs but I would be wondering "Should I order now? How long are we staying in this pub? I don't want everyone else to be moving on just as I start eating". Also, lots of pubs can accommodate 40 people but they would struggle with 40 people arriving together and the pub crawl will get very separated - not much fun for anyone who doesn't know many others? Mainly though, put out a few crisps and sausage rolls.

OP only wants a big pages long response of Yes. Even though she gave other information that people wanted to discuss she's made it clear it's beneath her to read them. Therefore this thread is a complete waste of time and not worth commenting on especially as OP is also extremely rude . Waste of time and thread.

"Need Catered" ?

OP you're coming across as a pretty unpleasant character & this 'celebration ' sounds totally shite but really who cares whether your tight friend provides a few soggy sausage rolls or not.

Well, I’m wishing I’d stuck with this thread now, purely for its novelty value. I’ve seen countless threads where OPs are upset/angry at being considered unreasonable. I’ve seen threads where OPs are upset to realise their partner/family member/friend has been treating them badly.

This is the first time I’ve seen a thread where an OP has asked “Is my friend being unreasonable?”, nearly everyone has said yes, but the OP has become horribly offended because everyone agrees with her!

@Itrtttyy you've done your best. Nudged her about catering which has resulted in a cake. Just sit back and do your own thing on the night.

Okay, the update I promised.

The party was last night. We ended up in the function room until 9pm, and then got a taxi straight to one other bar. I left at midnight.

People did just order themselves food at the bar. I still think it would’ve been much better to have a buffet but it was fine, and my friend had a great night which is the main thing I suppose.

So the planned pub crawl didn't happen and you didn't stay out till the early hours as predicted either!
Sound like it was a shit great party 😆

I left at midnight. Not everyone. I have no idea why so many people struggle with comprehension.

The update we were waiting for!
You know what I’m glad it went well and wasn’t as bad as everyone made out!!

I think that sounds fine, it’s what I would have done. Stayed at first pub I mean.
It would have been better to have planned it like that at start!
Your friend had a very cheap party/gathering.

It’ll be carrying on at 5am. I’d put money on it.

And I commented that you indeed didn't stay out till the early hours like you so confidently said you would!

OP- look at your own comprehension of what you said in your earlier post!

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I wonder how many people were bewildered that a function room was booked with a few decorations but no basic catering provided from the host. Especially since the pub crawl never took off and the function room was used for five hours.

Still seems an extremely odd way to host a party. But if the birthday girl enjoyed it that’s good.

OP is still as rude as ever 🙄