Avoiding the childcare trap

[Difficultquestionplz]

hi! I know there are a lot of high earners in this group so maybe other mums can help me. I am caught up in the 100k childcare trap.
back in the days when my salary was around the 100k mark, I was able to top up the pension, but that was before my child was born. Now my child has turned 3 and was hoping to finally get a little relief but it looks like it’s not the case…
currently my salary is higher, almost exclusively due to sales commissions and I am going to finish the fiscal at 260k. My husband is livid that he loses on benefits because of my salary and I am actually wondering if there is anything I could do in terms of investments that can be deducted that could bring me below the threshold.
I am not using any financial advisor because honestly when I looked into it they wanted to take 3% management fee just to manage the easy bits (pension, isas) and it obviously compounds.

thank you for helping
(please be kind, I don’t come from money, my job is paying well now but also highly at risk due to performance management or constant layoffs mixed with the joy of nepotism, unconscious bias/ blatant sexism of a male dominated environment)

You have another 4 average salaries beyond the £100k trap. The more you earn, the more you take home. No matter what the rate of tax.

Now get real, because you’re tone deaf and out of touch.

This is a joke, right?!

This! Financially that makes zero sense.
i earn just over 100k FT so working PT atm (also because I want to) but also because I can claim on childcare relief. On 260k childcare costs are a drop in the ocean. You could even hire a FT nanny!

If this is true I suggest you see a financial planner who can explain how tax works.

If you were marginally over the £100k then I’d agree with you feeling a bit hard done by as depending on outgoings, it could have a heavy impact. But you are so far over the tipping point and I suspect that you know this. Nobody who has that much of a household income should be claiming any form of benefit that is means tested like free childcare and I say that with us earning reasonably well so I have no skin in that game (I’m not including any form of PIP/DLA assistance).

In England you are still entitled to 15 hours childcare after age 3. What more do you want?

www.gov.uk/help-with-childcare-costs/free-childcare-and-education-for-3-to-4-year-olds

I think that reducing your salary for the childcare makes sense when you’re marginally over, but you’re more than double. Your husband is an idiot, does he not benefit in anyway from your large salary? You can easily afford the childcare and no you shouldn’t be looking for ways to scam the system so you can benefit. The cap is there for a reason.

Reported. Don’t believe this for one second.

😂

The loss of childcare at £100k is brutal, because you need to earn (approx) £150k to start being better off again. By that math you’re £110k above this, which after tax & NI is c £50k.
I’m confused as to why your partner is livid at your net higher position than usual?

For what it’s worth, I think there’s a lot about the childcare thresholds and tax system that needs to change. But for your personal situation it sounds like you’re far better off on £260k with childcare costs than you would be on £99k without them.

You expect tax payers to cover your childcare costs on that salary?

YABVVU and extremely grabby.

The husband is maybe really low paid and OP keeps all her very high salary to herself so that's why he is mad.

Fucking hell 🤦🏻‍♀️

Send it over the me I can make it disappear for you

What do you sell? I think someone with your skills will be able to pick up a sales job anywhere.

You can’t magic away 160k. Maybe give it Al to charity to keep your benefit? Would your husband approve of that?

Why are people replying - this is obviously a wind up.

This has got to be rage baiting?!

Your income is quadruple my households. We live in Wales where there aren't the free early childcare hours (only from 3+). We have to pay as I have to work to afford the income I have. Think you should apply the same principles and be grateful your financial situation is much much more affluent than the average person and I don't think you will find any sympathy here.

Stop being a stingy div and find a good IFA. They’re worth their weight in gold.
you earn too much to be poking around this stuff yourself just so you can save a management fee

Being in the trap is earning 1 or two grand over and like you say people top up pensions etc you are sooooo way over that a) on what planet are you financially struggling on that wage b) why should my tax pay for your childcare c) what benefits does your husband feel entitled to? I’m afraid you aren’t going to get kindness here, maybe some comments are blunt but really what you are requesting is beyond crazy

Oh and to add if you’re really that serious about protecting assets you would see getting the financial advisor as a good investment but you don’t want to even pay for some help

With annual pay of £260k (even more if you include your husbands), you can live extremely comfortably irrespective of childcare costs.

My advice to you and your DH is to relax, enjoy the money you have, and not ruin your good fortune by being resentful about being in a situation that 99.9% of people could only dream of!

If you’re bitter and anxious about your current situation, you’ll never be happy until you let go. Don’t be one of those people who is never satisfied with the money you have… because it won’t change, whether you earn £260k or £260m - some people are always driven for more, more, more, and it’s a waste of a life.

This has to be a wind up. No one earning £260k genuinely thinks they're entitled to free childcare. If you do you're a parasite as someone else pointed out. I suppose being parasitic is how most people do become so wealthy in the first place, though.

You want people to be kind because you are earning too much to claim free childcare?
Plenty of folk have pulled themselves up by their bootstraps from 'nothing', so yes, that's a great achievement, but it doesn't give one the right to try and cheat the system.
A rethink of attitudes is required here.

This.

Your husband is a complete selfish greedy sod.

I am not going to give you grief for being a high earner op, I earn well, but honestly at that wage it is game over trying to tinker around for tax/benefit purposes.

Ps people usually consider the £100k "trap" to be when you earn just a little over and lose more in childcare value than the extra pay gives you post tax (particularly due to high tax rate between 100 &120k) so its really worth putting a bit in pension etc

You are not in that position.