To fake a drinking excuse to avoid my friend finding out we are ttc?

[nondrinking]

This girl used to be one of my best friends, my bridesmaid, my partner-in-crime for ridiculous amounts of cocktails. Then I got married, had a baby, and settled into SAHM life (which I love), while she’s been off traveling, climbing the career ladder, and generally living it up. We drifted apart after I had my little one, which is a bit sad, but we recently started messaging again and have finally made plans to meet up after nearly two years!

Since she knows my husband very well, we’re making it a couples’ thing as she’d also like to see him, and she’s coming over with her boyfriend (whom I haven’t met yet). Naturally, she asked the all-important question: what are we drinking? Back in the day, we had a talent for putting away an impressive amount of cocktails and staying up way past our bedtime having charcuterie and wine, so fair enough.

Here’s the issue: my husband and I have cut out alcohol while we try for baby number two. It’s been over a year (no luck yet, unfortunately) so trying to maximise our chances any way we can. But we have also realised that telling people we’re TTC just leads to endless questions and unsolicited advice. And with this friend… she’s not known for keeping things to herself, and I know she’d be checking in constantly with “So?? Any news???” texts. I’d rather avoid that. From social media and the odd messages we have exchanged I know that alcohol is still a big part of her life, something she enjoys and I’m not sure she really socialises without it (not at all in an unhealthy sense)

So, AIBU to make up a reason for not drinking? And what’s a good excuse that doesn’t scream, “I’m pregnant” or “We’re trying”? Also, what about my husband? We can’t both be on antibiotics, surely?

I would say: You won’t believe this but we both gave up the booze 2 years ago! I know!! It’s mad but we started a bit of a health kick and feel so much better
we carried on. Don’t mind other people drinking though.

Just have a drink considering youre not pregnant yet

I would just say you don’t drink any more and that’s it. It was negatively affecting your mental health and it’s a nightmare looking after a child with a hangover.
I went from drinking like a fish at every night out or social gathering to not drinking at all because it just wasn’t working for me any more. I was turning into a miserable drunk and the hangxiety was awful in the morning. I found that the MH point was easy enough for people to accept and there weren’t any follow up questions.
Good luck to you with your baby making efforts.

“Oh we don’t drink anymore, gave up after having little one. But don’t let that stop you!” If you’re having them over to your house, ask them what they’d like you to get in for them. If they ask you about it, say you were having to pump and dump and it was shit so you just stopped drinking, husband joined you in solidarity and you both felt loads better for it so kept up with it. Not unbelievable really.

I think saying you don’t drink because having children and hangovers don’t mix is the best option. It’s plausible and as she hasn’t got children can’t dispute it. If she does, tell her that you have poured yourself a drink a couple of times since stopping and found you just don’t like the taste of alcohol anymore. That might turn out to be true. It was for me.