If you've watched 'Adolescence' would you consider watching it with a 14 year old?

[Fishsealife]

I was blown away by Adolescence - and obviously shaken by it.

I think my DS would benefit from seeing how what is on the internet can be a powerful force for the worst - and why I insist on controls.

Are any of you watching it with your kids or do you think it's too intense?

100% I think it was amazing and very realistic and shows how his actions impacts his family and everyone around him

I think it’s fine for a 14 year old to watch though our teens were mortified when the psychologist started asking the boy about sex… not something they wanted to watch with mum it turns out

It also showed how you don’t stop loving g your child, even when they’ve done something absolutely horrific. Our kids wanted to know if that bit was ‘real’ and of course it is. Prisons are stuffed with people who have committed awful crimes but whose mums still love them.

I watched it and my 15 yr old dd then watched it separately. We had a genuinely excellent discussion after (cunningly positioned that I was doing a You Tube cardio session so not looking at her, allowing her to talk to me side by side as it were). She brought it up as well. Really valuable 30 mins.

I would. But I also watched a lot of reality TV with DD at that age - love island etc, it’s about starting conversations with them ... What do red flags look like? What is a healthy relationship/friendship? Body image norms as portrayed by SM etc. You need to have a good balance of what you want them to watch and what they choose to watch. Tbf, DD would probably say watching Bridgerton S1 with her mum was more mortifying!

Ok, great. Thanks all. I'm glad you agree.

DH is a bit concerned that DS might 'turn it in on himself/get panicky.'

But it's such an important issue, I think a bit of panic around it wouldn't be too bad.

That final 15 mins when Steven Graham put the teddy bear in Jamie's bed and sobbed as he said he should have done more. OMG. I can't forget it. Or the 3rd episode, the two handler with the psychologist. Jamie is an incredible actor . I'm also a writer and thought the script was SUPERB.

I think it should absolutely be watched by teens.

My 14yr old watched it with me and it sparked lots of useful discussion. Definitely a must watch for parents and teens i think.

We needed a quick watch of the IT Crowd afterwards though, as it was quite heavy viewing.

I’ve said Yabu but only because it was far too slow for my teens to hold their interest. The innovative filming was impressive but made it definitely hard to keep involved in- like do we really need to see the whole journey to the police station or B and Q? Nope…

Worth it for a wake up call for parents who are clueless about what their kids access online. Or for parents who don’t talk to their teens. But for the teens? Nah.

I think filming it all in one take and in real time made it far more powerful and real

My son is 13 this summer. Is that too young? I haven’t watched it yet. My DS is quite sensitive so I think would be quite affected but then from what I’ve heard about the show, maybe that wouldn’t be a bad thing

i watched it with my 14 Yr old son. I was hoping it would lead to some insight and interesting conversation.

Sadly not, I did learn about the colored heart emoji and apparently everyone knows about them .... well everyone but me it appears!

This is a great way to mentor teens and talk about important life issues without the usual weight of the parent/child dynamic. Me and my teens used to watch loads together and it would take hours because we were always pausing to chat and debate.

I’d watch it on your own first. It’s very hard hitting. The message is more for parents really about knowing what your child is doing and being exposed to.

I watched it with DD14. Sparked good conversations about peer pressure, incels, misogyny- well, all sorts of stuff. We talked about how the camera work made you feel you were a constant observer. On to Toxic Town now.

Offered to watch it with DD but she wasn't interested (14) she already explained the red pill incel stuff to me when she was 12 though so she is way ahead of me on that front. Apparently they do talks at school about it (all girls) so they are very aware of the dangers online, but it does seem boys aren't as up to date. I wonder if they are simply not as interested in the psychology side as the girls? I say that purely by looking at the gender divide in who studies psychology.

I agree.

ds aged 13 asked about it and I said we could watch it together (I’ve already watched it), he got about half way through the first episode and just found it too slow and tedious for him.

(And he’s generally very into complex storylines / adult type programmes etc).

My DS15 told me to watch it with him as he was blown away by eps 1&2. He’s very anti manosphere and talks a lot to his friends at an all boys school about the fakeness of the ideology. As a former secondary teacher in a very typical comp, episode 2 struck me as genuine (apart from the clueless junior school guide and the unfettered access to classrooms) but the general disrespect and unruliness rang true, as it did for him before he moved to current school. We have had some amazing conversations since and watched Stephen Graham & Jack Thorne being interviewed. I somehow think the message is being lost of parents not knowing what their kids are up to, what they are taking on board as gospel as it resonates with them (which it is so cynically designed to do) amongst the “oh the acting, oh the cinematography” fawning. I wish there had been more than just Jade giving Katie a voice and more emphasis on how Jamie arrived at his destination, more obvious plotting of what was it at home that made him have no respect for life, take a slight so personally, feel it was his right to katie or any female. But it’s a start. Fingers crossed this is the beginning of the exposure of this toxic thinking and behaviour, that the public will start to call it out, but not hopeful.

I'm watching it with my 12 year old boy. We pause it if he has questions or wants to make a point. I wouldn't normally let him watch 15s but I think this is so important.

This is good to know. I’m thinking of watching it with mine, he will be 13 this summer. I don’t know whether to watch it first by myself or with him from the start. What have you done?

Just started watching it with him (and his dad too). I told him if he wasn't enjoying it, or found it too scary or anything like that we could stop straightaway, but so far so good (we're only 2 episodes in). Scarily he said the school was exactly like real life 😬although admitted it wasn't like that all the time at his school, thank god.

@Landlubber2019I also found out about the heart emojis watching Adolescence tonight with DD. We both enjoyed it and had some great discussions throughout all 4 episodes.

That’s an interesting take on love island, thank you, I just saw it as shallow narcissism making tv. Might consider a rethink 🤔👍

@Brownhairdontcaremy DD also said the school was completely realistic

I also learned that… and the same day MNHQ posted an update about the MN app which ended with a purple heart emoji..which made me smile 😆