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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

So, who is going to employ all these disabled people the government wants to wean of welfare

1000 replies

Jimisnotmyname · 18/03/2025 16:14

Really wondering. Not saying it is necessarily a bad thing to encourage those who can work, to work but as a carer for 2 disabled family members, I am hugely struggling to find another job as nobody is willing to give me any flexibility (which I need as a carer) and there are always candidates who do not need the same accomodations I do. I would imagine that many of those currently not in work because of disability or a health condition, will often need a similar level of flexibility. I just wonder who on the the government think will offer jobs galore on these circumstances??

OP posts:
ForeverDelayedEpiphany · 18/03/2025 19:12

Kitfish · 18/03/2025 19:01

I am bipolar and hold down a job fine because I don't take lithium, which is a terrible drug with many side effects. Get your friend to go back to the doctor and ask to be changed to a different medication - such as risperidone. You'll be amazed to discover he is able to work after all and will have a much better quality of life.

Risperidone and other antipsychotic drugs are also pretty awful too though, very neurotoxic with lots of horrible shitty side effects (one of which i unfortunately have - a movement disorder called tardive dyskinesia).

But of course, everyone is different and not everyone will react as badly to medication as I had.

Wintersgirl · 18/03/2025 19:12

GypsyQueeeen · 18/03/2025 19:09

Agree. A big issue here appears to be a lack of resilience. It seems many young people are not being raised to be resilient, and can't seem to cope with regular life events.
Partners leave, people die - these are normal life events that some people seem unable to cope with. I've known people in their 40's/ 50's who have had a week/ 2 weeks plus off work when a parent has died.....

Coupled with "everyones a winner" attitude that some schools have it's a recipe for disaster, life sucks sometimes and that's just life...

Maitri108 · 18/03/2025 19:12

GypsyQueeeen · 18/03/2025 19:03

Do you agree with forcing people without disabilities into jobs they don't want to do?

So, people with disabilities should be able to pick and choose? And if they don't like the idea of working in a shop on minimum wage they shouldn't have to? Even though they are capable?
And the tax payer should therefore fund them instead?
With respect I think it's these attitudes that have landed the Country in the shit state it's in. And why they're having to make these cuts.

I don't think anyone should be forced to do anything. If someone is capable of work, then they should have support finding work they want to do and have experience/training in. The work should also be adaptable to their disability.

ImRonBurgandy · 18/03/2025 19:12

DP will be able to work. He just needs to come in late, have a nap around lunchtime and leave early. He also can't focus on any tasks or do any manual labour.
DD can work. She might be off for a month every couple of weeks, won't follow instructions or wear clean clothes, wash her hair or brush her teeth.
But Liz has fixed them, as they were just being stigmatised.

TheWombatleague · 18/03/2025 19:12

Swiftie1878 · 18/03/2025 16:39

Just reading Mumsnet, it’s ASTONISHING how many people (and the proportion of them) have disabilities/debilitating health issues, or have children who are disabled or debilitated by SEN symptoms.
Was this country always so poorly and we just didn’t know about it? Or has our health deteriorated really badly over the last while, and if so, why?

There is barely a poster on here who doesn’t have disabilities to deal with in some guise other. ☹️

It's not equal across all sections of society though, just looking at the "healthy life" expectancy rates shows a huge difference that's explained by socio-economic differences.

We know that the more equal a society is ( regardless of how wealthy) the happier its citizens are and we're becoming increasingly unequal.

We work longer hours than most comparable countries, for less rewards. We under invest in education, the single biggest factor in driving a country's economy ( something like £3 returned to the wider economy for every pound invested) under invest in healthcare and public services, deliberately inflate the cost of housing and sell off every public asset we can.

The consequences are nobody has faith in the political system, feels they have a stake in their communities or can access the support they need in any area of life.

I'd love to see some weighty research on stress and it's impact on the health of the nation.

ZigZagJigsaw · 18/03/2025 19:13

WalkingonWheels · 18/03/2025 19:05

I'm not supported as it is. I get £409 a month PIP. That's it. No UC, no ESA, no housing, nothing. Because I have a husband who works. I can't pay half the housing, let alone anything else. That £409 is supposed to be for costs related to my disabilities. It goes on my half of the rent. I can't afford carers, therapy, adaptations, aids. I literally lie in a bed all day, every day and I don't think people really understand how little support there is.

But isn’t this the problem, the money is being spread amongst too many people? I think my friend’s sons get about £400 a month each and, as I said, even she says they don’t need it. Personally, I would prefer that money is taken off those that don’t need it and given to those genuinely in need, like yourself (from what you’ve described).

Flowerypond · 18/03/2025 19:13

Exactly OP. Liz Kendall has been in Parliament and on the news today.wangjng on about how it’s a terrible binary system now where you can either work or not. When some people have fluctuating conditions.

Yes, quite true. some people do have fluctuating conditions. And then as soon as their conditions do fluctuate, they are either sacked or if they are honest about their conditions, they are not employed in the first place.

Where is the big revolution in making employers be inclusive and not ableist? And isn’t that where they should have started?

Hdjdb42 · 18/03/2025 19:14

I worked with disabled adults and we got them jobs easily though Remploy. They were government owned businesses. Thousands of disabled people in my city worked for them. Unfortunately the government closed them all down years ago, to save money. Oh the irony!

TheFormidableMrsC · 18/03/2025 19:15

BrandonFlowersEyesWithEyeliner · 18/03/2025 17:54

Uhhh.... She's working hard ! Why on earth would I judge her ? I think you've misunderstood what this thread is about..?

No I have not misunderstood at all . I’m a parent of a disabled child who is in receipt of high rate DLA and I am reading the thread as, at some point, today’s decisions will affect him. Your comment about fibromyalgia being something people “use” to claim PIP was really offensive to me when I see the realities of such an horrific diagnosis.

ZigZagJigsaw · 18/03/2025 19:16

Maitri108 · 18/03/2025 19:09

I'm 'deluded' in your opinion which I don't think much of. Great talking to you.

I’m not the only person pointing out how deluded you are. Private sector employers are not charities, their purpose is to make a profit.

WalkingonWheels · 18/03/2025 19:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Are you that thick? I've already said that I'm confined to bed because I can't sit for longer than ten minutes in my wheelchair. Clearly when I'm in the bathroom I'm not confined to bed, because I'm confined to the bathroom. It's hardly rocket science to understand that when someone isn't in the bathroom, they're confined to bed. Goodness me.

GypsyQueeeen · 18/03/2025 19:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Mightymoog · 18/03/2025 19:18

Coco1789 · 18/03/2025 19:12

But, whilst grief is a terrible, awful thing, surely getting out to work every day, contributing, earning money, is actually a very healthy approach? Life goes on, and whilst it’s awful, and yes of course have some time off work in the immediate aftermath, sitting at home on benefits grieving is the worst thing you could do for your mental health.

yes, I agree totally and that's what I did.
But it WAS incredibly hard and I can see that some people just wouldn't manage it and this is made worse by the attitude that grief should be medicated and treated as an illness whereas the approach should be to basically try to get on with life.
I can't imagine anything worse than having sat at home for months not working: surely that just gives more time to go over what happened which is no good for anyone,
So yes, I agree with you but I can see it's too hard for some

Iwishicouldflyhigh · 18/03/2025 19:18

Maitri108 · 18/03/2025 19:12

I don't think anyone should be forced to do anything. If someone is capable of work, then they should have support finding work they want to do and have experience/training in. The work should also be adaptable to their disability.

Finding work they want to do?????

do you think that anyone really , really wants to clean toilets?

I’ve done done really shit jobs in the past….because it was all that was available and I wanted to earn.

BrandonFlowersEyesWithEyeliner · 18/03/2025 19:19

TheFormidableMrsC · 18/03/2025 19:15

No I have not misunderstood at all . I’m a parent of a disabled child who is in receipt of high rate DLA and I am reading the thread as, at some point, today’s decisions will affect him. Your comment about fibromyalgia being something people “use” to claim PIP was really offensive to me when I see the realities of such an horrific diagnosis.

But it IS a diagnosis that's easily used by nefarious claimants !!!!!!

Usernamexyz1 · 18/03/2025 19:19

thankyounextplease · 18/03/2025 16:34

I happily hire mums who need school hours in my company, so I'm flexible on that. I'd be more than happy to do the same for disabled people if the government covered the cost of sick days (over a certain reasonable number) in full. As it would be too risky to have to cover out of my own pocket, it's hard enough as it is to cover sick.

please contact liz or lbc. gov should hear this.

satsumaqueen · 18/03/2025 19:19

PaintDecisions · 18/03/2025 16:46

Which environment is this? That's so friendly to wheelchair users?

Do you think people using wheelchairs have no other issues than non working legs? Pain? Toileting? Movement? Other issues?

I’m not sure why the post you are replying to got deleted as I didn’t even say anything bad, but anyway i work for a large national company - house hold name - with multiple offices all over the country. they are a huge equality employer including people in wheelchairs. I think it’s a shame that you seem to have resigned yourself to the fact that people in wheelchairs cant work. Not all in wheelchairs can work but a lot of people can with the right environment and many buildings around the country can absolutely support wheelchair users.

WhitegreeNcandle · 18/03/2025 19:19

thankyounextplease · 18/03/2025 16:34

I happily hire mums who need school hours in my company, so I'm flexible on that. I'd be more than happy to do the same for disabled people if the government covered the cost of sick days (over a certain reasonable number) in full. As it would be too risky to have to cover out of my own pocket, it's hard enough as it is to cover sick.

Me too. Very similar situation. Have 9-2 jobs available. Not great pay but a good second income part time.

We actually employ quite a few people who have anxiety and depression and have done so over the years. They like us as a small family company who genuinely care about the staff. We’re in farming so it’s not like being in a Greggs where if you don’t turn up you don’t make as much money, you are needed. The staff say they like that and the feeling of job satisfaction. Thing is all these staff have been 50+. Once here they often stay for donkeys years. The youngsters however come to interviews (to show the job centre) and then disappear off the face of the earth. There are loads of them - most living at home from what I can tell. Someone or something is paying for those people - either their parents, the state or nefarious deeds. This has to change. When did it become acceptable to be capable of work but choose not too? There’s a huge difference between these people and genuinely disabled (whether through mental health or physical disability).

Kirbert2 · 18/03/2025 19:20

Swiftie1878 · 18/03/2025 16:39

Just reading Mumsnet, it’s ASTONISHING how many people (and the proportion of them) have disabilities/debilitating health issues, or have children who are disabled or debilitated by SEN symptoms.
Was this country always so poorly and we just didn’t know about it? Or has our health deteriorated really badly over the last while, and if so, why?

There is barely a poster on here who doesn’t have disabilities to deal with in some guise other. ☹️

1,645 children aged 0-14 are diagnosed with cancer every year in the UK. Last year, my child was one of those children.

Due to complications, cancer has left my son disabled. He is thankfully in remission but his body will likely never be the same again.

18 months ago he was perfectly healthy and now I have no idea what his future holds and that's without the fact that since he's had chemotherapy which saved his life, he's more prone to heart issues in the future as well as secondary cancer. It has also probably left him infertile.

That's just how quickly life can change.

Butchyrestingface · 18/03/2025 19:21

Hdjdb42 · 18/03/2025 19:14

I worked with disabled adults and we got them jobs easily though Remploy. They were government owned businesses. Thousands of disabled people in my city worked for them. Unfortunately the government closed them all down years ago, to save money. Oh the irony!

I had a relative who used to work for Remploy in a building trade role (he wasn't disabled). Always spoke very highly of it and our home had quite a few pieces of furniture produced in the factories.

Years later, I was friends with a late who worked in the local factory which employed a lot of deaf BSL users. She said they loved working there - BSL was the primary language used amongst staff and employees so none of the usual communication issues they encountered out there in 'hearing' world. Then the factory was shut down and they were forced out, back out into the mainstream working world where they'd be perhaps ONE deaf BSL user among a plethora of hearing non-signers. That's assuming they could even find employment within mainstream employers - historically deaf BSL users have often struggled to secure work.

ZigZagJigsaw · 18/03/2025 19:22

Hdjdb42 · 18/03/2025 19:14

I worked with disabled adults and we got them jobs easily though Remploy. They were government owned businesses. Thousands of disabled people in my city worked for them. Unfortunately the government closed them all down years ago, to save money. Oh the irony!

Closing Remploy was an incredibly short sighted decision. I remember thinking that at the time.

Maitri108 · 18/03/2025 19:22

Iwishicouldflyhigh · 18/03/2025 19:18

Finding work they want to do?????

do you think that anyone really , really wants to clean toilets?

I’ve done done really shit jobs in the past….because it was all that was available and I wanted to earn.

What country are you living in because I'm confused. Where I live you choose a job, you apply, you go for an interview and so on. In your country people aren't given a choice over what they do, they're sent to employers and forced to work.

Are you in Communist China? In communist China people didn't have a choice over what they studied or where they worked.

butterfly0404 · 18/03/2025 19:22

I have a number of health issues including a significant spinal injury causing impingement on the spinal cord, cancer (treated but likely to return) PTSD, generalised anxiety disorder, adjustment disorder, ADHD, severe depressive disorder resulting in 2 suicide attempts, chronically severe incontinence due to my spinal cord injury that I'm having to use a anal irrigation system as I physically cant evacuate my bowel, arthritis in my hands, neck, hips and spine, dupetryens contracture, chronic severe asthma which puts me in hospital over the winter and now severe B12 deficiency, Pernicious Anaemia, that's caused permanent neurological damage and issues with my sight. .. I've managed to stay in full time work only because I'm able to wfh, mostly from my bed, and use up all my sick leave every year.

I don't put my full time hours in as I physically can't but I've managed to do just enough not to get sacked. Any other employer would have binned me off years ago.

I've had enough and would like to retire but I know I'm not going to get any benefits and not enough in my pension to even consider early retirement.

A lifetime of ill health meant not being able to properly contribute to a pension.

WinterBones · 18/03/2025 19:23

Swiftie1878 · 18/03/2025 16:39

Just reading Mumsnet, it’s ASTONISHING how many people (and the proportion of them) have disabilities/debilitating health issues, or have children who are disabled or debilitated by SEN symptoms.
Was this country always so poorly and we just didn’t know about it? Or has our health deteriorated really badly over the last while, and if so, why?

There is barely a poster on here who doesn’t have disabilities to deal with in some guise other. ☹️

i have been posting on MN for 18 years. I wasn't disabled 18 years ago.. i mean i have always had adhd/asd but 18 years ago i was working full time in quite a physical job as classroom assistant for reception age kids. I LOVED IT.

Then i had my own son, who turns out to be signficantly disabled. I went into supermarket/checkout work so i could work evenings/weekends. Then he went to school, and within 2 years i had to quit my job, claim DLA for DS, and carers allowance for myself. The plan was always i would return to my school job.

That was 10 years ago. In the last 10 years i've developed arthritis, degenerative disk disease that is crumbling my spine and sciatica. In the last 3 my mobility has bombed to the point i need a wheelchair occasionally and use double crutches full time. I'm in constant chronic pain. I have fatigue, potentially a very bad hip to go with the crappy spine, and just had the possibility of long covid related Fibromyalgia thrown in the ring by my dr.

People develop disabilities as they age. I'd give my right arm for how healthy i was aged 30, but age 44 i'm staring down needing to claim PIP for myself, and now wondering if i'm even able based on the proposed changes.

EVERYONE is one accident, one illness, one chronic condition away from being disabled.

Iwishicouldflyhigh · 18/03/2025 19:24

Maitri108 · 18/03/2025 19:22

What country are you living in because I'm confused. Where I live you choose a job, you apply, you go for an interview and so on. In your country people aren't given a choice over what they do, they're sent to employers and forced to work.

Are you in Communist China? In communist China people didn't have a choice over what they studied or where they worked.

What are you talking about??!

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