To want 9s not 7s for my child in their GCSEs?

[ZeldaFighter]

Child is a model student and no problems with behaviour or attendance. Definitely seems intelligent and diligently completes homework, often without prompting.

Report is 6s and 7s. Husband is pleased and says they're As and Bs. He thinks only kids in private schools doing extended papers get 9s.

I got As, Bs and Cs many years ago but I always strived for As. AIBU to think they should be getting 9s or at least striving for them?

My kids went to state schools and got nines.

However, there is no should. They can either do it or they can't.

Maybe lay off with the pressure.

Just be grateful he is doing well. 7 is the old A. Why would you be fissapointed you are lucky.

Does it really matter what you would prefer? If your child is a “model student”, then presumably they are doing their best and these are the results they are capable of achieving. Parental disappointment is much more damaging than non-stellar GCSE results.

You don't say what year they are now. Some schools like ours don't predict any 9s at all

9s are the equivalent of an A** so yes I think you are being unreasonable. If you got As then why are As not good enough for your child.

You can want what you like, but It doesn't mean youll get it.

Are they y11 now?

What are school saying their predicted grades are?

What do you mean, ‘AIBU to think they should be getting 9’s’? The vast majority of children DON’T get nines as it’s exceptional. So YABU to assume getting 9’s is easy.

As long as your child is doing their best that’s all you can ask!

Don’t put so much pressure on your child.

A model student is surely already trying their hardest and best so no you would be unreasonable to expect or want 9’s as clearly that’s not what they are genuinely capable of.

Of course children in state schools get 9s. But I have said you are being unreasonable because it's not for you to say what you want it's what your child is able to do.
In the scheme of things it doesn't matter in the long run if they get 7s 8s or 9s but their mental health is important.
Don't pressurise them.

I think you are being ridiculous. Take your child out for a huge celebratory slice of cake, apologise to your husband for behaving like an idiot and have a look at your own current attainment levels and do a little striving of your own.

YANBU to think it, I just hope you arnt verbalising that to your child. I have images of a very stressed out young person now. I hope you keep your expectations to yourself

Is that 6+7’s now or projected?
Your child will attain what they are capable of. You could hire tutors or if you are capable work with them yourself to increase capability.
im not fully up on numbers but isn’t 6 a c+/B- and 7 a B+ /A-. They are not bad grades.

Perhaps they’re not 9 material ? It takes more than attendance and good homeworks to be a high achiever.

Nothing wrong with aiming as high as possible and stretching yourself.

What does your DC think? Could he/she do better?

Please don't pressure them or show you are disappointed with their grades. I've had anxious students shaking and crying before exams because they put themselves (or are being put under) lots of pressure - it's awful. Mine did their best and got the grades needed for college. Job done ✔️

DS is predicted between 7s and 9s.

We talk about working towards Good, Better, Best. So aim for 9’s, with the knowledge that you will be proud of a 7.

But if they are working really hard and getting 6 or 7, then maybe that is their good better best (6,7,8).

you can strive but also be realistic

YANBU for wanting your child to do well. YABU as these aren't your exams. And the most important things is that they get what they need for the next step of their education.

The grade boundaries are set each year so you can't definitely say 80% is an I etc.
A 7 is a great achievement anything above that is exceptional. Sixth form and colleges don't require such high marks. Once you have A levels or equivalent they take priority for university placements. Undue pressure is not helpful in my opinion

What does your child want?
Remember who has to do the work here, and then pipe down.
A happy kid with a clutch of 7s is far preferable to a burned out one.
Let them be. Your disappointment will do far more damage than a 7.

I am an academic who has sat on a number of Mitigating Circumstances Committees, to which university students submit petitions explaining their problems.

If your DC perceives your attitude I think you will be setting them up for profound mental health problems.

All they can do is their best. Striving for top marks motivates some but is highly counterproductive for others. Trust your DC to know by now what works for them.

YABU to think your dc should get 9s if that is beyond their capacity. You can put too much pressure on a child.

It’s impossible to comment without knowing your child. I have taught children who coasted along with a string of sevens who really should have got nines but were lazy. Mostly boys, if I’m honest. I have taught children who absolutely busted a gut to get 8s/9s when on paper they were expected to get 7s.

Blimey- don’t pressure the poor kid!

mine went to a average state school - one was a right little shit but got a range from 5 to 9 including 100% on a poetry paper, one was a delight and worked hard gaining 6-9’s and my youngest is sitting them this year and will struggle to get higher than a 6 in one subject and to get 4’s in the others!

its not the end of the world - as long as kids try and work hard just be proud of the effort!