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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that men believe everything on IG/Tiktok is real

107 replies

Maria971 · 11/03/2025 17:56

It takes seconds for influencers to edit/facetune their body, making waist narrower skin smoother etc, eyes bigger nose smaller etc…. It’s just as easy to edit videos as images.

But there are so many men who seem to simp over TikTok influencers when it’s not even the ‘real’ them… do these men really believe what they’re seeing is, well, real?

OP posts:
Maria971 · 18/03/2025 18:45

Jabberwok · 11/03/2025 21:54

No man I know (and I am one) finds the following attractive
. Slug eyebrows
. Brazilian butts
. Lip filler
. Ridiculous large artificial breasts
. Orange fake tan (in fact I heard two lads about 20 laughing about the skin tone a young lady had achieved yesterday)
Ie everything the op says men like. Sadly it young girls believing they should look like that because of influencers.

A lot of it comes from misunderstanding of what a lot of black women in the USA have been promoting, that shapely bottoms and bigger lips are as attractive as more "standard" ones. i.e. The image that the fashion industry has been promoting for ever .... That the idea woman is white and size 0. Even when using models of colour, they have Caucasian features.

You might be right that some men hate the 'IG' look, but there's a good number who also seem to like it. Women with that look, whether the boobs are real or not, do have hundreds of thousands of followers, and lots of adoring comments..... So they do have their fans.

Promoting that big butts are better than 'standard' ones is no different to the US/UK promoting that huge breasts on a very thin body are better than 'standard' ones. It does also make me think that it it's promoted because that's what men really want/find ideal, or maybe that's just what Hugh Hefner found ideal, as it's the first time in history that that has been the 'ideal'..

In some ways, the small waist, big butt trend has helped white woman who have that body type, but who for years hated their bodies and just wanted to be a lollipop (i.e. stick with no hips and big boobs, no disrespect to women who are that shape!).

You're right about black models often having Caucasian features - that's a form of racism and it's very sad.

Tiktok/Instagram warping to unhuman extremes is damaging in any case. Even if men say it's 'just a fantasy' and they know it's 'enhanced, I don't think people consciously think this when they look at things on Tiktok/Instagram, so it's bound to seep into their minds as though it is something 'real'. I don't think peoples' minds are that good at discerning what's real and what's not in some cases, but I'd have to look for a psychology study to back that up.

OP posts:
ThisChic · 15/04/2025 22:32

KIlliePieMyOhMy · 12/03/2025 08:19

I think the phrase 'all men' or even 'all women' should be banned.
Of course they don't all think the same. This is mass othering.

I think when people say 'all' they really mean 'a majority' or 'many'.

ThisChic · 15/04/2025 22:39

ManHereSorry · 12/03/2025 10:53

The vast majority of men don’t bother with Instagram or TikTok!

I wish that was true but it isn't. Not for millennials and Gen Z - the majority are on it!

BlondiePortz · 15/04/2025 22:40

Yes but women who make themselves all look the same and use 'pressure' to fake everything seem just as gullible

Screamingabdabz · 15/04/2025 22:50

My dd is 23 (and stunning - could easily be an influencer) and she and her friends couldn’t give a flying fuck what men want or what men find attractive. They are so bored of the shallowness of men who think the value of a young woman is how ‘fit’ she is.

ThisChic · 15/04/2025 23:21

Screamingabdabz · 15/04/2025 22:50

My dd is 23 (and stunning - could easily be an influencer) and she and her friends couldn’t give a flying fuck what men want or what men find attractive. They are so bored of the shallowness of men who think the value of a young woman is how ‘fit’ she is.

I'm sure your daughter is naturally beautiful, but influencers are all fake and artificial.

ZoggyStirdust · 15/04/2025 23:23

Simp

are you 12?

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