Horrified about DP’s sexist comments about IWD

[ThisFastLion]

We hosted friends last night, it was quite boozy and the topic turned to International Women’s Day.

My DP started ranting about how ridiculous it is and that men aren’t afforded the same ‘treatment’. He then questioned what happens on this day, and suggested ‘all the women should do the ironing’ whilst the men go down the pub. None of my friends nor their partners laughed at this and it was an incredibly awkward atmosphere for the final hour of the night.

i had a huge go at DP when everyone left and he simply doubled down and said he was joking.

AIBU to find that completely inappropriate?

I think he was trying to be funny and it backfired. I think I would have said at the time in front of all the guests ‘Well that opinion went down like a lead balloon, no one is laughing, now why don’t you be a good boy and make a start on the washing up.’

Oh excellent. Easy exit.
The doubling down would be enough for me.
This is who he is.

Time to make a sharp exit.

It has never really come up in conversation before last night to be honest.

He has always been dismissive of women’s sport, but I’ve put that down to more personal views in terms of entertainment value rather than having anything against us!

I'm surprised that after a year you've never gauged his views on women. If you're quite 'traditional', it might not have come up.

Josh, he felt a bit emboldened then, didn't he? If that what he'll say in public, imagine what he keeps inside his head!

I'd get rid personally.

So he has form for being a twat.
Give your head a wobble and dump.

He’s not with me again until this evening. I will bring it up again then and I expect him to be more apologetic having had time to reflect.

I can accept the occasional ‘boys will be boys’ esque comment when drunk but to that extent and to then double down is worrying.

He was drunk and his mask slipped. Huge 🚩

Take notice.

Complete deal breaker. I would dump on the strength of this. You don’t share values and you can be damn sure if he ever moved in you would be expected to wait on this sexist dickhead hand and foot.

Also how crushingly embarrassing in front of your friends. They will be hoping you end it too.

So, now that he thinks you won't dump him, the mask is coming off. Sorry OP, but this is the real him. He has been putting on an act before. Thankfully you don't live together and have no children together. It's only been a year, I'd throw this one back.

Don't tell him the real reason though, because he'll just make sure to hide it for longer with next unfortunately woman who finds herself in a relationship with him.

Dismissive of women’s sport?

Honestly @ThisFastLion he is a shitty misogynist.

He's part of the wider problem.

Men only complain about them not getting the same day because they are waiting for a woman to organise it!!!!

He needs to read the invisible women book. You can't hide from facts. For example men have more car accidents but women are more likely to die in them because car crashes test dummies are designed on the male body, the female ones are just male dummies made smaller.

Healthcare is designed by men for men. There are not enough studies into women related illnesses as research is centered around men.

Womens inventions and research findings were taken from them and named after their brother's/dads in the past.

When apple first launched their health app it didn't cater to half of users because there was no period tracker.

Even emojis were first designed around men. Even mobiles are designed for mens hands.

Public loos?. If he ever wonders why the women's queue is always longer. They are designed by 50/50 floorspace but as men use urinals their toilets cater to more men at a time than the women's. Women also taken disabled people, elderly people and children to the toilets. Not to mention it's/periods etc.

I could go on forever but ultimately he's a typical man who thinks women just want to winge. The day is to actually highlight that these things still haven't changed and actually we are not blaming men of today but asking them to recognise it and make changes in their lives to help us.

I would have assumed it was a stupid joke he made and he lacks a filter.
Anyway IWD is a ridiculous concept like most of all other international days (sleep say, dog day and so on).
I thought it was a communist invention to pretend they valued women, and of recent times it is being turned into yet another opportunity for commercial gain.

Having an international men day is equally pointless. I didn't even know there was one.

If he has form for " occasional laddish comments" this can hardly be a surprise to you.
Men don't make " laddish comments" unless that is what they are like.
So his drunken comments about IWD and about women is showing how he really despises women under the veneer.

Big red flag.🚩
If you are not ready to dump him yet, don’t move in with him and don’t get pregnant. Even by accident.

I think there are far too many of these “days” to the point they’ve become completely meaningless.

Also think they missed a trick tho - should’ve been March Fourth no?

"sprouted" 🌱😂

It's every other day of the year isn't it?
He was clearly trying to be 'funny' and I'm glad nobody else laughed. You should just say his mates were all cringing and not one other person was laughing or finding it humorous. That it made him look pathetic.

I hope you don't really do his ironing? If you did before, don't anymore! And maybe you and your mates should go down the pub tonight, leaving him with the kids and his precious ironing?

He sounds spectacularly dim. I wouldn't ever be moving in with someone like that (you have said not "yet").

As for him sneering and asking when International Men's Day is, could he not Google it? Or does he expect you to do that for him too?

Ugh, so he's a sexist.

I’d expect an apology of course, but really can you stay with someone who thinks like that? When he says it’s a joke he only means that he assumes everyone would mostly agree and laugh along - not that he didn’t mean it. I can’t think of a single decent man who would make these kind of comments over the evening.

This man has just shown you who he is, and you have your fingers in your ears not listening.