In-laws letting Baby watch tv

[Gwjb2024]

I have a 14wk old. I try not to have the TV on around him as I’m worried how it will impact his brain development while he’s so little. That’s not to say he’ll never be aloud to watch TV. I’m very much looking forward to snuggly movie nights when he’s older but for now I don’t like him looking at it. We’re currently at the in-laws - who are well aware of my stance- and they keep putting him in front of the tv. We were playing in the lounge and he was sat watching so I turned the tv off - no one was watching it. MIL stated ‘ you just need to accept that the tv will be on when he comes to grandma and grandads’
i wasn’t sure what to say so I laughed awkwardly. Am I being ridiculous? How would you approach this or do I just accept that he might be stuck infront of it more than I would like while we’re here?

Totally over the top

At 14 weeks old it is surely easy enough to not place him facing the tv? I do understand your annoyance though, it’s not like it needs to be on. However,
You can’t really dictate what other people do in their homes though, maybe it will be a case of visiting less?

Yes, you’re being ridiculous.. at that age he’s not really watching TV

Hmm so I have a near 12 week old, my second child. We sometimes either have the TV on to watch or just background...but it's not for the baby. I don't put her in front of it to actually watch. Occasionally ill see her turn towards it and I'm fine with that, but I don't place her in front of it. I'm pretty relaxed about the tv but I don't put it on for the baby. She doesn't need it.
If they want the tv on in the background, that's fair enough, it's their home, however you can turn your baby away from it. Just beware if they're babysitting, it sounds like the tv will be on for your baby.

When DD was a baby she loved Soccer Saturday on Sky. It was the heady mix of Jeff Stelling, and text rolling across the screen.

She hates football now

At 14 weeks it’s a bit OTT, and you need to not control what the GP do in their own house.

Yabu, it's going to make absolutely no difference to your kid

Yes OP you are being absolutely ridiculous.

Do they just have it on in the background on an adult programme or are they literally placing baby in front of tv and putting on CBeebies?

the former is normal and not much you can do about. The second is batshit at your baby’s age and would def rule them out of future regular childcare while your child is young.

They can do what they like in their own home, but if as a result you take him there less and they don't get to spend time with him, that's their choice.

And you're not being ridiculous, you're trying to be a good mom. Screens are terrible for children, best not to let babies have them while you can.

Yanbu, I didn’t have tv on when mine were babies either (they watched some CBeebies programmes as toddlers but that was a deliberate choice and we interacted with it rather than having it on in the background). It would be different if anyone was actually watching it, then you could have just turned your baby away and continued to play with him.
If they continue to do it just visit less - point made.

I remember my baby loved the winter Olympics when she was about 3/4 months old, she loved the snowboarding! It's not such an issue honestly. As long as they're not just plonked in front of it all day with no one engaging.

I think it's strange to have the TV with no-one actually watching it, especially with visitors. But if he's so young, surely he can face away from the TV. Does your husband share the same stance as you, and is he on the visits with you? If so then I'd ask him to be the one to set the boundary with his parents if it's something you've decided together is important. If he doesn't care either way, then I'd probably give up and accept that visiting their house means TV on.

Am I being ridiculous?
Yes

Yes , you are being ridiculous

I definitely wouldn’t put the tv on for a baby but what is everyone doing while you are sitting feeding for hours if not watching tv? At 14 weeks it would probably be pretty easy just to turn the baby away from the TV and not ask grandparents to babysit for a long time!

You’re wrong, having the TV on around babies is not recommended, especially for language development.

I am exactly like you OP regarding tv around babies/toddlers. There is research that supports the idea that ambient tv/radio noise stops babies being able to focus on talking in the room and hence impedes their language development, so I do not think you are being in the least bit ridiculous in taking this appraoch. I think it is fine to ask to have it off, perhaps your DH can explain it is important to you. If they are resistant for the sake of a quiet life I'd let it go. A bit of tv noise will not do too much harm, it's more valuable for you/the baby to have a good relationship with them.

It depends. Are you objecting to it being on in general, or them e.g. sitting him in a bouncer pointed at it?

If the latter I'm absolutely with you. I did not allow my child to watch anything until around 3.5 and I expected all family to respect that. I wouldn't have said anything if it was on in the background and DC wasn't paying attention, but I would have if they'd stuck them in front of it.

Bit disturbing they are putting a baby that young in front of the tv. It’s bad for their eye development so
YANBU.

Just don't let them put him in front of the TV?
Let them come to your house instead of going to their house, or your husband can meet up with them in a cafe etc.

YANBU in my opinion. That would piss me off too. We didn't do tv before 3 and DH was always switching the tv off at his mother's. She never had DC by herself but god knows what she would have done, when DH was that age, she was giving him milky bars everyday.

Why would anyone deliberately put a baby in front of the TV?! I don't think it's the end of the world and if the baby is in the room whilst others watch then fine, but seems unnecessary to switch it on FOR the baby.

Um.

When mine were that young I managed to binge watch an awful lot of box sets during the inevitable night feeds.

Is it really the case that having the tv on around a baby at all from any age has a negative impact?

Are they sitting him in a bouncy chair in front of the tv to watch or is it on while the baby is in the room?

Mine watched House, Buffy and Angel with me while I was on maternity leave, meaning I was watching it while they fed, slept, cuddled etc.

Gently, can I assure you that the tv being on sometimes, and him looking at it, will not adversely affect his brain development. He is fine. This isn't something you need to worry about.

Grandparents are there to spoil children. They will give him more sugar and rubbish food than you like, they will buy him toys you don't want him to have, and they will speak to him in an annoying way or whatever. But all of this is because they love him.

Pick your battles. This isn't one of them.