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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I really want this job but is this a red flag?

159 replies

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 11:16

I'm looking for a new job and have been invited to attend an interview this Thursday at 2:30. Unfortunately I have a dentist appointment on Thursday at 2pm which has been booked for well over a month. I have an NHS dentist and they are very very strict with cancelling and rescheduling appointments. I cancelled once last year (first time in 7 yrs) due to an emergency and they said if it happened again then I would be taken off the register. It's not great but I only stay with them as I can't afford to go private.

Anyway, I spoke with the hiring manager at the beginning of last week and she contacted yesterday to arrange the interview. In all fairness I never mentioned my appointment when I initially spoke to her as it just slipped my mind but she also didn't mention what day the interviews would be on if I was successful getting to the next stage.

I've asked if she can accommodate another day/time to which she's said no. I really want this job, but she does seem a bit inflexible/awkward. Or am I the one being awkward? I don't really want to risk losing my dentist for a job that I might not even get and I think expecting someone to cancel a prior appointment with 3 days notice is a bit unreasonable. Would this put you off?

OP posts:
Hankunamatata · 04/03/2025 13:43

Our place has panel that is pulled together from different areas. They do one day and only once day

Tiredofallthis101 · 04/03/2025 13:45

I'd see this as a sign they wouldn't be good to work for. I would always offer alternative slots even if on a super tight turnaround.

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 13:45

@lanthanum yes sorry my fault I should have mentioned but yes it's a dental treatment not a routine check up on this occasion (although my dentist is awkward when it comes to both anyway)

OP posts:
millymae · 04/03/2025 13:46

I think I’m out on limb here but hey no - I don’t see it as red flag but rather than your dentist is taking the p… I know to my cost that arranging interviews is a nightmare and having to reschedule one person causes alsorts of issues for the interviewing panel. Where I work it certainly wouldn’t be entertained unless it was a vacancy at the highest level.
Restaurants and hairdressers allow cancellations with 24/48 hour notice and bearing in mind the interview is scheduled for Thursday your dentist would have plenty of time to fill the appointment. Surely they wouldn’t strike you off if you were unable to attend if you were ill….
If I really wanted the job I’d be telling the dentist a white lie - there’s plenty of nasty bugs going around to choose from - and going to the interview. I not an advocate of lying about these things but sometimes needs must.

Midlifecrisisxamillion · 04/03/2025 13:47

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 13:39

I have withdrawn my application anyway, thank you for your replies and suggestions.

Well with all due respect then you probably didn't massively want the job so both the org and you have probably had the best outcome.

Goldielocks2p22 · 04/03/2025 13:50

It might not be the actual company itself. My company contract it out but you wouldn’t know going through the process and honestly they are a nightmare.

Ask me multiple times for availability, they have KPI’s around time scales but delay themselves then put pressure to do interviews in one day. They also give candidates limited options. I’d just say you can’t and see if they come back

popandchoc · 04/03/2025 13:52

That wouldn't be a red flag to me, we usually interview people during lunch or after work as know that is better time for them. We wouldn't try and dictate a time.

5128gap · 04/03/2025 13:53

Go to the dentist and forget the job. If they'd been sufficiently excited by your application they'd have rearranged for you, so you could indeed be losing your dentist for a fairly weak possibility.

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 13:55

@Midlifecrisisxamillion well I was very interested in the job, but as mentioned previously, I didn't want to risk losing my dentist or delaying my treatment after waiting over a month to be seen. I didn't really have much choice.

OP posts:
Midlifecrisisxamillion · 04/03/2025 13:57

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 13:55

@Midlifecrisisxamillion well I was very interested in the job, but as mentioned previously, I didn't want to risk losing my dentist or delaying my treatment after waiting over a month to be seen. I didn't really have much choice.

It doesn't seem like you even rang the dentist to check what might be possible. You weren't cancelling the appointment, you were asking to reschedule. You could have explained it was for an interview. Oh well, you missed out.

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:00

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I didn't need to ring them though?! I've already been told that if I try to reschedule or cancel then I will be taken off the register as they have a 2 strike policy. I also desperately need to be seen as I have a severe infection and have waited over a month already for this to be sorted and it is affecting my other teeth quite badly.

OP posts:
Midlifecrisisxamillion · 04/03/2025 14:03

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:00

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I didn't need to ring them though?! I've already been told that if I try to reschedule or cancel then I will be taken off the register as they have a 2 strike policy. I also desperately need to be seen as I have a severe infection and have waited over a month already for this to be sorted and it is affecting my other teeth quite badly.

But you could have tried and you didn't.

TheAmusedQuail · 04/03/2025 14:03

Interview days and times will be preset to interview a number of candidates. Unfortunately, you are just one of many candidates. Can't make the date, you don't get the interview. I've had this experience myself.

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:05

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I didn't need to try, the dentist already stated that I would be taken off the register. I also couldn't delay my treatment any longer.

OP posts:
Stepfordian · 04/03/2025 14:08

Big red flag for me, I wouldn’t want to work for a company that are so inflexible.

Midlifecrisisxamillion · 04/03/2025 14:09

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:05

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I didn't need to try, the dentist already stated that I would be taken off the register. I also couldn't delay my treatment any longer.

Well I certainly would have tried. What did you have to lose? If the dentist said they'd remove you during the phone call you could have THEN cancelled the interview. You could have asked to swap to a cancellation if one came up on the same day/different time. I would have done if I really wanted the job. You could have also changed dentist to a non NHS is you really wanted the job. Oh well.

TheAmusedQuail · 04/03/2025 14:11

Stepfordian · 04/03/2025 14:08

Big red flag for me, I wouldn’t want to work for a company that are so inflexible.

This is corporate life. Candidates need the job a lot more than the employer needs 1 applicant.

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:14

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I'm sorry but that's ridiculous. Do you know how much private dentistry costs compared to the NHS? I can't afford that. People are fighting to get an NHS dentist. Why would I give that up?

Ok, so say I didn't have a dentist appt but I was working that day. What if my manager had denied my request to take the day off (baring in mind this company gave me 3 days notice of the interview). What would your suggestion be then? Quit my job to go to the interview?

OP posts:
Midlifecrisisxamillion · 04/03/2025 14:20

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:14

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I'm sorry but that's ridiculous. Do you know how much private dentistry costs compared to the NHS? I can't afford that. People are fighting to get an NHS dentist. Why would I give that up?

Ok, so say I didn't have a dentist appt but I was working that day. What if my manager had denied my request to take the day off (baring in mind this company gave me 3 days notice of the interview). What would your suggestion be then? Quit my job to go to the interview?

Yes I do know there's a difference in cost between NHS and private but personally I'd prioritise a job interview. You didn't and that's your choice but don't blame the employer for that.

As for the other bit about leaving your job, it's irrelevant as that's not what happened.

Ihopeyouhavent · 04/03/2025 14:21

I've worked in recruitment and this isnt a red flag.

It means they have a schedule of interview dates, with rooms booked , interviewers lined up etc. There's a deadline of when the interviews take place, washups and offers made. Schedules cant be changed just because 1 candidate cant attend.

Its unfortunate, but happens all the time.

Nanny0gg · 04/03/2025 14:21

PrimalLass · 04/03/2025 12:54

Is that easier or harder than finding a new job?

Harder

Imbusytodaysorry · 04/03/2025 14:23

@sundayclean you aren’t cancelling your dentist.
You are calling to re schedule . Two different things

LadyNairne · 04/03/2025 14:23

I’ve done a lot of hiring and organising of job interviews in my professional life. At my current large company we need 3 managers plus 1 HR person for a panel even for junior positions.

I will shortlist usually a maximum of 4 candidates for interview so we will schedule 2.5 - 3 hours in the calendars of the 4 staffs members to do 4 x back to back 30 minute interviews followed by 30 minutes to discuss the candidates, compare our scores and make our decision for HR to take forward.

Persuading 4 staff members to give up 3 hours then fitting this time into their schedules is hard and especially as the panel has certain diversity and seniority requirements.

I therefore give the interviewees zero choice on intervirw time. If one candidate was outstanding, and my top choice on paper, I might be a little flexible but not for the others. Just can’t manage it. If one drops out generally I think it makes my choice easier as I then only have to do 3 interviews not 4.

Sorry it’s so brutal but I hope this helps explain why it’s not necessarily a red flag about a company or organisation rather just down to practical time pressures.

Imbusytodaysorry · 04/03/2025 14:25

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:00

@Midlifecrisisxamillion I didn't need to ring them though?! I've already been told that if I try to reschedule or cancel then I will be taken off the register as they have a 2 strike policy. I also desperately need to be seen as I have a severe infection and have waited over a month already for this to be sorted and it is affecting my other teeth quite badly.

Oh no you need your dentist app then .
You can’t go to the interview.
Health is more important than a job

sundayclean · 04/03/2025 14:25

@Imbusytodaysorry yes I know they are different but it's a 2 strike policy so even rescheduling will get you kicked off the register

OP posts: