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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask about your favourite stage of parenting?

58 replies

Doingmybestbut · 03/03/2025 19:55

I asked my DM and MIL what their favourite stage of parenting was recently. They both said when their children were five. I was a bit surprised, because that’s quite an early peak and suggests a long time of parenting children before adulthood when you’ve already had the best years! And I was also a bit sad because we’re almost at that stage already.

YABU: It’s more complicated than that/I had a different favourite parenting stage.
YANBU: DM and MIL were right, around the age of five was the best age IMO.

OP posts:
Huckyfell · 03/03/2025 19:58

It's been a wonderful journey, many happy memories throughout, having children in laws is an amazing experience. As are babies. (Teenagers oosh)

Brassbumblebee · 03/03/2025 19:58

5-7 was my favourite but it's all had its ups and downs, shes currently 10 and still manages to amaze and annoy me every day 😅

TheMousePipes · 03/03/2025 20:04

Honestly couldn’t tell you - dd has been awesome for the past 15 years and I’ve loved every last bit of it.

Putthekettleon73 · 03/03/2025 20:07

TheMousePipes · 03/03/2025 20:04

Honestly couldn’t tell you - dd has been awesome for the past 15 years and I’ve loved every last bit of it.

Love this ♥️. My eldest is 14 and still so lovely. It's such a privilege seeing him grow and become a young adult. I miss the toddler bit of him but everything you pour in is there. It's all lovely, and different.

My youngest is nearly seven and that's a lovely lovely age as they are pretty rational, safe, funny, and she's so affectionate. Im squeezing every minute out of it because she's my baby.

Ddakji · 03/03/2025 20:13

Hmm - I think between 5-11 we’re pretty good - the primary years. Everything seemed pretty straightforward. School good, friends good, holidays and days out were moan-free zones, by and large.

CautiousOptimist · 03/03/2025 20:14

I think the primary years are amazing. I look forward to the holidays with my three DC (age 12, 10 and 5) who are past tantrums and danger naps, can do some things on their own but still like hanging out with me!

I love love love still having a little one who wants to live with me forever, gives amazing hugs and has school assemblies and drama shows I can go and watch.

I also love love love having tweens who are still awake now at 8:15, just hanging out with us. One is doing a bit of homework, the other is dipping fruit pieces into chocolate to make a pudding for a cubs badge, we're just chilling and chatting and listening to music and it's lovely. At the weekends me and the eldest have been watching BBC's Sherlock and the first season of Stranger Things, and he just has the best chat.

So, don't be sad. I don't know what's round the corner - I'll have a teen in a year, and have no idea - but I reckon 5 is just the beginning of a really great bit!

CarpetSlipper · 03/03/2025 20:15

I love every stage. Mine are teenagers now and such lovely people. I really enjoy their company.

AnOldCynic · 03/03/2025 20:15

I'm still waiting...

ParsnipPuree · 03/03/2025 20:16

Those early years when they think you're perfect.. around 5-9

Comedycook · 03/03/2025 20:16

Primary age is fab. Past the exhaustion and relentless of the baby and toddler years but not yet at the teen moodiness and dramas. They are independent enough so you're not too shattered but still lovely and sweet

SweetChilliGirl · 03/03/2025 20:17

Mine are 16 and 18 and are smart, loving, wonderful almost-adults. But my favourite bit was about 6-11. Still need you, want cuddles and to hold your hand, but are pliable and fun to hang out with and actively want to. And their homework is easy!

Edited to add that they go to bed early enough so parents get a bit of an evening but don't get up at the sparrow's fart, either!

And have sleepovers and camps away with scouts, so we got a break now and again.

ThighsYouCantControl · 03/03/2025 20:17

There’s pros and cons to all the stages I think. For example, I know my baby is always safe because she’s with either me or her dad or both and her needs are fairly basic: clean bum, full tummy, sleep, cuddles. She’s too young to have her feelings hurt or be anxious about friendships and school. Everything is new and fascinating to her. But she knackers us out. I’ve aged about 50 years since she was born.

At the other end of the scale, my oldest is 17. We have a laugh together, can talk about all sorts for hours and I love her company. But I worry a lot more about her than I do her baby sister. I worry when she goes out with her friends, incase she’s sexually harassed or worse, her mental health, her education because I want her to achieve what she wants to achieve…

TL:DR I love all the stages but at each one I’ve wanted to scream with frustration at each age more than once.

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/03/2025 20:17

CarpetSlipper · 03/03/2025 20:15

I love every stage. Mine are teenagers now and such lovely people. I really enjoy their company.

This. I was not a great mum of a baby. But older than that at any age has been fantastic.

Mandylovescandy · 03/03/2025 20:17

I actually loved the baby stage, being off on maternity leave, spending all day with them, no emotions to deal with, before lots of other stresses. Eldest is 8 though and it's still great

Cheezewizz · 03/03/2025 20:17

Between 5-9 I would say were my favourite, I now have two preteens and i reminisce about that those ages

Bluenotgreen · 03/03/2025 20:18

I loved the toddler stage best. They are developing proper personalities.

So cute. 😍

FairBrickBiscuit · 03/03/2025 20:20

LOVED all of it especially up to end of primary. If I had to really pinpoint I’d say 5 to 7. They are really interested in stuff, start being able to play more complex games, have interesting conversations, start finessing their sense of humour…

But really I loved it all and now that they have both left home I miss them every day and sometimes wish that I could have hit a button when they were kids so they would stay that age forever. 😂

ok I know I sound really pathetic!! 😁

NorrisToenail · 03/03/2025 20:20

Now. DS's are 12 and 14, they're independent, no need for childcare, help around the house and almost always get their pee inside the toilet! They're also chatty, loving and interesting, we can have great conversations about school, the news, football etc and I'm not just humouring them. They're ace.

Ribenaberry12 · 03/03/2025 20:22

I loved the teenage years. Watching them find themselves away from us and grow into the adults they have become was wonderful to see.

Comedycook · 03/03/2025 20:27

I do also love newborns.... toddlers and teens are joint first place for toughest stage!

Tishomingo · 03/03/2025 20:28

I’ve enjoyed every stage for different reasons. I think we’ve been very fortunate to have easy kids on the whole though.

Phineyj · 03/03/2025 20:29

I'm still waiting.

purpleme12 · 03/03/2025 20:29

Baby/toddler/pre-school. Although mostly baby

She's 11 now

She's very challenging with her behaviour.
And it's not a new thing

GrannyGoggles · 03/03/2025 20:30

My two are in their 40s

I LOVED newborns. And toddlers. And pre schoolers. Primary children too.

Early secondary not so much. Coming out of it by GCSEs. Really enjoyed sixth formers and undergraduates, albeit with a few bumps along the way

Launching into functional adulthood presented some challenges

They’re married to good people, with two fabulous children a piece, making their way in the world.

I am fortunate to have had many favourite stages of parenting. It continues to evolve.

Hankunamatata · 03/03/2025 20:30

Quite like last three years primary school. Still young to be enchanted but old enough that dont need to be watched like a hawk

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