Aibu to not let my 12 year old go into town with his friends

[WHYohwhy12]

So just that really. My son has just turned 12 and his friends keep going on at him about going into town. They went in on Saturday and were in town with no parents for five hours. They've now sent lots of negative messages about how he didn't come and being mean. I feel 12 is a bit young to be hanging around a town centre with other kids the same age. However would seem like I'm in the minority with his friends parents. I don't think it's helps that he is small for his age so looks about 10 where his friends are all really tall so look about 16. We live half an hour walk from town or a 10 minute bus ride. I just feel conflicted because I think 12 seems quite young he's also been assessed for ADHD which I think muddies my opinion

Going into town: cinema, McDonalds, WHS, to join a theatre/craft group, no problem.

Going into town: to hang about in a rowdy group, hang about at the tob floor of the car park vaping, having trolley races and referring to other young people using unacceptable disablest terms, which a group of 6 to 10 youngsters do at my shopping centre every weekend. No way.

My dc never "went into town" to meet mates. DD went to town to go to one of the museums, sometimes going as far as the West End to look at particular shops, sometimes with a friend, sometimes alone. DS usually met friends to play sport.

It really depends on your child.

We’re in London and dd (yr 8 - age 12) is allowed to travel via tubes and trains to various shopping centres/areas in London. During school hols they can be out for 5-6 hours. Some of her friends travel via tubes/train to central London for school and like to pop to Starbucks afterwards.

They’re interested in eating tacos, choosing lip balm in Sephora and shopping in Brandy Melville. They’re not interested in vandalising or stealing things. They think it’s ‘cringe’ to do that.

They work out the routes themselves and aren’t afraid to use google maps to get somewhere new. They know that if they misbehave these privileges will be revoked.

Maybe have a chat with your child to see what it is he plans to do, whether he knows the routes etc. As others have said, at some point he will do stuff without an adult and better that he’s prepared.

I think it depends on where you live, and also the kids. My DS and his friends never showed any interest in going into town. Our nearest small city is 50 minutes away on the bus, and DS says its full of tourists, the shops are full of tourist tat and its too expensive.
DS's friends formed a band when they were 14, and also took up golf together (the only things for teens to do near us other than getting stoned in the woods are golf and horses). So there was never much hanging around town, it was one friend's house in the city for band practice (and pubs as they got older) and our house after golf. It can he a faff having a house full, but it means I get to know his friends.
I think who your DC makes friends with is the key to everything.