Do your DC call their friend's parents Mr and Mrs (last name)?

[Emerald95]

My DC (9) was talking to his MIL on the phone about his afternoon at his friend's house and said 'Then Brian took us to McDonalds!'. MIL asked who Brian was, when my DC told MIL it is his friend's dad she said it was very odd to call him by his first name, not Mr (last name).

My DCs have have always called their friend's parents by their first name or '(friends name) mum' if they don't know their name yet.

Using Mr & Mrs (last name) seems very american to me and I could only imagin my children using that if their friend's parent was also a teacher at their school.

Is this a generational difference or maybe location dependent?

What do your DCs call their friend's parents? YABU - They use Mr and Mrs (last name)
YANBU - They use their first name

My kids are grown up but never used anything but first names. My friends' kids have never called me anything but my first name.

Mr and Mrs is really formal. Maybe in the 1970s

By their name or if they don't know their name they say Jack's dad or Jill's mum. It's not odd at all and it feels very outdated and old-fashioned to use surnames not least because many of their friends parents don't necessarily share the same surname so Mr and Mrs Surname wouldn't be accurate.

First names only round here. Or just "Hi Dave's Mum" when they were younger and didn't know our names!

Pahaha no, that would be seen as very old fashioned here. My DC always said 'John's mum' or used their first nane if they knew it.

First name or x's mum/dad. I run a couple of kids groups so most kids know my first name and refer to me by it.

Same here! I’d feel like a total idiot insisting my kids’ friends call me Mrs X!

I remember being an over thinker as a child. Friends parents would tell me I didn't need to call them Mr/Mrs X, but didn't explicitly say to call them by first names either. So I'd just find every way I could to avoid addressing them by any name and using "X's mum" if talking about them to someone else.

I think if my son said Brian instead of "X's dad" when he wasn’t around I'd find it a little surprising, but not wrong or disrespectful. I wouldn't think twice about him saying Brian to his face though.

My DS (now 28)always used 1st names, as did his friends (referring to me).
My generation (born in the 1960s) however, always called friends' parents Mr & Mrs. In fact, only a few days ago I was reflecting that I didn't even know what old schoolfriends' parents first names are.

I’m 38 and if I was relaying a story about a friend’s parents I’d still say “Kate’s mum and dad”! But I suppose that’s mainly because it wouldn’t make much sense if talking with somebody who didn’t know that person, without referencing who that person was.

Mr and Mrs is just a bit old fashioned. If MIL is of an age where anybody older / more senior than you was automatically given a deferential title (my mum still remembers having to call her boss Mr Simpson) then it probably seems normal.

I'm in my 50's and I called my friend's parents by first name in the 80's it's never occurred to me to introduce myself to my dc's friends by anything other than my first name - in addition despite being married for 20 years to their dad, i never really responded to my married name, I've since remarried and I keep forgetting to even write the correct name!

50s and I still call friends’ mums Mrs X and Mrs Y !!

No, it's generally Xs mum/dad. Upper primary age. I still got that from a few of them who I've told just call me by my first name!

Fewer and fewer parents these days will actually be Mr and Mrs, in any case. It's not a practical expectation in this day and age, especially for youngish kids who won't necessarily remember all family member's surnames anyway. I'd be profoundly unimpressed to be addressed as Mrs anything.

Yes I think both generational and location dependent.

I am a 1980s child and I was born in the UK, and I don’t really know what was used but certainly not Mr and Mrs. Then I moved to NZ aged 8 and there it was always Mr and Mrs.

Now my DD (in NZ) would just use first names or x’s Mum.

I was thinking about this the other day actually as I was watching a TV show where they said Mr and Mrs whoever. I know none of my friends’ parents ever introduced themselves to me as that, and it’s odd to just assume that they were married and did have the same last name! I know back then it was more common for that to be the case, but still.

I’m the same age, and I also called my parents’ friends by their first names. But elderly neighbours, or friends of my grandparents were always “Mr and Mrs so and so”, so it’s definitely generational. My Mum told me that her Mum even called her own friends “Mrs Whatever” in the 50s!

My DC are grown now, but even when they were at school they had loads of friends with divorced parents/blended families, where the surname situation was much more complex than “Mr and Mrs [friend’s surname]”

E.g. My DD’s best friend was the child of divorced parents - she had both of their surnames double-barrelled. Let’s say Ella Potter-Granger. Ella’s father lived abroad, so she lived full-time with her remarried mother, who had added her new husband’s surname to her own (e.g. Mrs Potter-Weasley), and her stepfather (Mr Weasley).

With all that going on, first names were a lot simpler.

I remember being confused about this as a child! I had the same best friend through most of infant and junior school, and so knew her mum well. I never knew what to call her! First name felt too informal, and I felt like my parents would disapprove, but Mrs X sounded way too serious!

In the end I plumped for nothing, and in probably 8-10 years of friendship, I never called her anything! I think I was too shy to ask.

Friends of my kids call me by my first name, and I'm pretty sure they call their friends parents first names as well. They both have a couple of Eastern European friends, who call me Miss FirstName, which I think must be a cultural thing.

In my circle it's always first names. Except one of the private schools always insists on Mr and Mrs for all grown ups, so the kids tend to use it for parents who don't mind so they don't forget and get into trouble.

I realised the other day that I have no idea of the surnames of most of the children in DS' class (and I don't think he knows them either). I use their first names but generally revert to X's mum/dad with DS.

I agree with this. I've found it hard to move from calling them this in my youth to first name terms.

Yes, it’s mostly a generation thing.

I’m in my late 50’s and usually called my friend’s parents by their surname so Mr & Mrs Smith or if we were v close best friends, I’d call them Aunty Beryl and Uncle Tom. Obviously we weren’t related at all. 😂

My own teen DS would refer to Jack’s dad or use his first name if he knows it and his friends would definitely call me by my first name.

White British and brought up in the Midlands.

At home my son calls his friends' parents X's mum and/or dad but in person it's Mr and Mrs X. Maybe a bit old fashioned but that's how it is. His friends has also always called us Mr and Mrs. I didn't think it was odd 😊

Same here, I feel like it's something my parents' generation might have done but would have felt too old fashioned and formal for me in the eighties.

My children are all in their 40s

It was always first names

Even when I was a child back in the 60s my mum had a friend and I always used her first name
All the rest were aunties!

I called my best friend's parents Uncle and Aunty <first name>.

DS's pals call me Freddy's Mum or Aunty <my first name>.

Depending on how well I know the parents, it’s either First Name or Aunty/Uncle First Name.