Do your DC call their friend's parents Mr and Mrs (last name)?

[Emerald95]

My DC (9) was talking to his MIL on the phone about his afternoon at his friend's house and said 'Then Brian took us to McDonalds!'. MIL asked who Brian was, when my DC told MIL it is his friend's dad she said it was very odd to call him by his first name, not Mr (last name).

My DCs have have always called their friend's parents by their first name or '(friends name) mum' if they don't know their name yet.

Using Mr & Mrs (last name) seems very american to me and I could only imagin my children using that if their friend's parent was also a teacher at their school.

Is this a generational difference or maybe location dependent?

What do your DCs call their friend's parents? YABU - They use Mr and Mrs (last name)
YANBU - They use their first name

Mine are grown up but they always used first names for the parents of their friends.

My DC call parents who are from my ethnic background Aunty & Uncle X as it is considered impolite for a child to call an adult by their first name within my culture. I’m in my 40s and still call my parents friends aunty/uncle.

They refer to all other parents by their first name.

Yes - until the adult says they can call them by the first name. It’s just polite

They called them Mr &Mrs whatever, until invited to use their fist names.

Genuine question but how is not polite to use the person's name? I cant comprehend how it's considered politer to potentially call someone the complete wrong name by potentially using the wrong surname but using their actual name is impolite?

When I was little (now 44) the older neighbours on our street were Mr Smith, Mrs Brown etc, but the parents of friends i knew quite well somwere always Rose and Andy, or Dave &Cath.
Now my 8 yr old calls her friends parents Harpers mam, or Katie's mam 🤣🤣 my older 2 just used their 1st names now though.

This seems to be generational.

Similar to how I dislike people in shops or offices or on the phone for business purposes or in emails presuming to address me by my first name.
I really dislike that. As if we are old friends.
And I supposeit also rankles because they are younger than me.
When I was young older people were accorded more respect.
Which all respectable people accepted.
We accepted and observed it as youngsters.
We bided our time
Until we would be accorded the same status.
But it has largely disappeared.
So we never got our turn .
Feels unfair

Very generational. Growing up
in the 80’s we called our parents friends Mr/Mrs or Aunty/Uncle even though not related. Friends parents were referred to as mr/mrs or mum/dad of. Rarely by first name unless you were their age. As adults my friends still refer to each others parents as mr/mrs with the parents saying call us by our names. But the kids still say. mr/mrs as that how they have been brought up.

Hahaha, same! Old habits and all that.

When I was young it was always Mr or Mrs X. All my DC's friends call me by my first name, as do my DC their parents.

No it's not.

My kids always used first names

It's just different in different families

Where I was born and brought up all the residents referred to each other as Mr or Mrs Surname.
They might have lived next door for many years and become very fond of each other and helpful.
But it was always Mrs Surname.
And they were all adults together.
Householders.
So of course children would never call or refer to an adult by their first name.

Well maybe in the 1950s but it's 2025 now!

Your MIL is my MIL and I claim my £5!

Seriously, MIL once tied herself up in knots telling DS1 that her name was 'Marion...Auntie Marion...my first name was AUNTIE!'. Nobody in DH's family is allowed to refer to the generation above as anything other than 'Auntie X'.

My family don't give a shite and get on with each other just fine.

When DS was young he called adults George's Mummy picked up from Peppa Pig

Now he's a teen he calls them by their full name Mrs George's Mummy until they tell him their first name

I'm nearly 40 and my friends parents were first names to us and mine to them

YANBU, first names only has been a thing since I was a child, late 80s and early 90s.

My son used to have a friend who, I'm ashamed to admit, annoyed every cell of my body! He didn't call me my first or last name he called me 'George's mummy'. It used to drive me insane!

'Err George's mummy could I have a drink please'
'Err George's mummy george is playing with playmobil wrong'

🙄🙄🙄

Call me anything bar 'Georges mummy' and I'd be happy!

I never called friend's parents Mr/Mrs in the 80s and 90s - none of my friends did either.

My kids wouldn't know their friend's parents' surnames anyway.

It’sa generational thing. Mr/Mrs etc has significantly fallen out of use in personal settings.

Very few of my DC's friends have parents with the same last name, so that would be a nonstarter here.

I was also a shy and anxious child who was worried about getting it wrong so tied myself in knots to never address my friends parents as anything but 'you'. Glad I'm not alone! If they weren't there I'd call them your/X's mum.

Actually, I've just realised I never called any of my BFs or indeed MIL by their name, ever! Just 'you' ('would you like another cup of tea', etc. Not 'oi, you!')

I don't remember any of my friends calling DM 'Mrs Hut' or 'Granny's Mum😂

One of DDs friends calls me Mini Granny's Mum to my face, and it always feels a bit odd, but not as odd as my first name would feel.

I think this is very true and it's a relatively recent shift, well within living memory. I often have to look at old paperwork as part of my job. In the 70s and perhaps later I've seen internal memos between people working together, in the same building, every day, for decades, calling each other Mr X and Mr Y.

LOL - I'm in my 50s and I still wouldn't call my friend's parents anything by Mr or Mrs. Smith etc. At the point they ask me to use their first name I just have to stop calling them anything!

Relatives in the south of the US have their kids calling everyone Ma'am and Sir though which always seems very formal. Or Miss (first name) Mr (first name) - so Miss Jane (for all adults marital status irrelevant) or Mr John.

Same. There are inevitably going to be some occasions when a child has call to address the parent of a friend or peer and they aren't sure of both surname and title.