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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have made DH change the nappy?

85 replies

NappyArgument · 22/02/2025 21:20

I need your opinion on if IABU or not.

DD is 8 months old and needed her nappy changing earlier. I made DH do it. He wasn’t happy about it, as he was carrying her off to do it he muttered something like “I can’t believe you’re making me do this” and then I started tidying her toys up while they were gone and he said “you’d best not be coming in here”. Then he shouted DDs name really harshly at her, I said what’s wrong and started heading in and he said “she’s moving around!”. I said I was coming and don’t shout at her like that, it’s not her fault. Then he shouted “she’s got shit all up her arse!” and I said I’m coming and he stormed off and I changed the nappy. When I got back into the room he was pretending to be asleep so I brought DD up for a bath and I’m now feeding her to sleep.

In my defence, this was the only nappy he would have changed today. He hasn’t been pulling his weight at home at all. Baths are supposed to be “his” job with DD but I’ve done the past 4 out of 5. He’s also supposed to do the bins/recycling but I’ve been having to pick that up a lot too.

In his defence, he has a manual job and he’s struggling at work at the minute and not been sleeping well so was tired and just wanted to stay sat on the sofa.

He gave me an hour off this morning to shower and do my hair and he made us all breakfast. We had a nice day out and when we got home, he went upstairs for an hour on his own while I fed DD and the dogs and tidied the kitchen. I don’t know if this bit is relevant but felt like I should add it.

So what do you think - AIBU to have made him do the nappy?

OP posts:
JHound · 23/02/2025 19:20

Sounds like a dud partner.

Inmydreams88 · 23/02/2025 19:35

Nothatgingerpirate · 23/02/2025 19:08

If he was and she was a SAHM, then she would have jumped and changed the nappy without talking too much or all this drama.
Yes, I'm a woman and yes, it does work like that for some!

Oh please. 🙄🙄

I’m a SAHM and my husband does his fair share of nappies, weekends and weekdays.

Sunnnybunny72 · 23/02/2025 19:46

This doesn't bode well.
Make sure your contraception is watertight OP.

notatinydancer · 23/02/2025 20:57

NappyArgument · 22/02/2025 22:38

It felt like a break because I normally take her with me. I thought that was a normal/common thing for mums with little babies?

Does it make a difference that he is depressed? Shouting aside which I know wasn’t right, I think he wasn’t annoyed at her really he was annoyed at me.

Of course it's not right.
Ok if he's at work when you need a shower , otherwise you hand him the baby and TELL him you're having a shower / washing your hair / whatever.

notatinydancer · 23/02/2025 20:58

Nothatgingerpirate · 23/02/2025 10:48

Is he the only one bringing income into the household?

Why ?

notatinydancer · 23/02/2025 21:04

Nothatgingerpirate · 23/02/2025 19:08

If he was and she was a SAHM, then she would have jumped and changed the nappy without talking too much or all this drama.
Yes, I'm a woman and yes, it does work like that for some!

What ? Is this 1950? Of course fathers have to change nappies when they’re at home.
Just because someone is a SAHM you really think she has to change every nappy ????
Someone has done a good job on you.

although I am hoping this is a joke.

gamerchick · 23/02/2025 21:04

Well, he's made sure you don't ask him.again. hasn't he?

Nanny0gg · 23/02/2025 21:06

Nothatgingerpirate · 23/02/2025 10:48

Is he the only one bringing income into the household?

What's that got to do with anything?

gamerchick · 23/02/2025 21:06

Nothatgingerpirate · 23/02/2025 19:08

If he was and she was a SAHM, then she would have jumped and changed the nappy without talking too much or all this drama.
Yes, I'm a woman and yes, it does work like that for some!

Yeah, if you're a mug.

Onthemaintrunkline · 23/03/2025 22:35

What an immature,…. words fail!

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