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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to think that a 2yr old should't be drinking coffee?

64 replies

JohnsonsIsBest · 09/05/2008 20:20

a friend of mine is quite oblivious to the fact that her DD drinks approx 2 cups of coffee a day by taking sips from Mummy's mug.
There have even been occasions when she has had her own teeny cup (an espresso one) to be luike Mummy.

Am i being unreasonable? i don't think so as i've read that even one cup of coffee can affect your sleep patterns as an adult.

Her DD doens't sleep well...

I have hinted on a number of occasions that 'oh dear she's just had a sip - you won't sleep tonight' and so on but, oh I don't know, she doesn't seem to get it.

Am i being unreasonable?

OP posts:
blinkingthreetimes · 09/05/2008 20:21

YANBU

lilymolly · 09/05/2008 20:22

No No No No No

YANBU

Stupid behaviour

Original poster
JohnsonsIsBest · 09/05/2008 20:28

thank you!!!!
what could i do to try and disuade her??

OP posts:
mrsgboring · 09/05/2008 20:30

You can't dissuade her, really, it's her life (but sadly also the child's)

At your house, always secretly switch her to decaff.

Cappuccino · 09/05/2008 20:32

it's absolutely, positively, none of your business

I think YABU going round to your friend's house and then coming on here to slag off her parenting

Whooosh · 09/05/2008 20:32

My dd on a Saturday morning has a very milky,very weak,decaff coffee and loves it- is that so bad?
Two cups of "normal" coffee however would be a complete no no for me.

jaspersslave · 09/05/2008 20:33

i let my dc have tea (never near bedtime though)
but coffee NO WAY!

Cappuccino · 09/05/2008 20:34

I don't know where you get this 'two cups' figure from either

you are just assuming

exaggerating as well I imagine

Shitemum · 09/05/2008 20:35

My nephew used to be given coffee when just 7 or 8 yo. Then he was diagnosed as hyperactive and put on drugs. They still kept giving him coffee tho. Fucking stupid if you ask me.

WigWamBam · 09/05/2008 20:36

What Cappuccino said.

It is absolutely none of your business. You can't force her to take on your standards, and you stand to risk the friendship if you try and dictate to her what she can or can't do with her child.

JackieNo · 09/05/2008 20:37

DD and DS sometimes have an espresso cup with very milky filter coffee in it at breakfast time at the weekend. Sometimes they drink it, sometimes they don't. I was a bit when DH suggested they could, but really, I don't think it does too much harm. I've wondered in the past how much caffeine is in a bit of coffee compared to how much is in chocolate but don't know how to find out.

Divastrop · 09/05/2008 20:41

how do you know she is having 2 cups a day if shes only taking sips?

ive seen people give children that age coke,whats the difference?(apart from that coffee probably has less crap in it)

Cappuccino · 09/05/2008 20:42

Average cup of instant coffee 75mg caffeine
Average mug of instant coffee 100mg caffeine
Average cup of brewed coffee 100mg caffeine
Average cup of tea 50mg caffeine
Regular cola drink up to 40mg caffeine
Regular energy drink up to80mg caffeine
Plain chocolate bar up to 50mg caffeine ? milk chocolate has around 50% caffeine content of plain chocolate

from here

so tea isn't that much better

and chocolate has caffeine in it

and we have no idea how what formula you have used to work out how many sips constitutes 2 cups

I think Jackie's approach is lovely

amytheearwaxbanisher · 09/05/2008 20:44

i would never let ds have coffee but thats only because he is a hyper madman at the best of times

emj23 · 09/05/2008 20:47

I personally wouldn't give my DC tea or coffee, and you of course are free to decide what you give your own, but you are being unreasonable to comment on it if a friend thinks it's okay. Beyond the first mention of 'Are you sure she'll sleep alright?' it would be very bad manners to harp on about it every time you meet.

monkeymagic · 09/05/2008 20:53

My SIL & BIL give their 2yo ds coffee. They think it's hilarious that he's always asking for "Daddy's coffee". Not something I would ever do, but each to their own.

milliec · 09/05/2008 21:11

Message withdrawn

milliec · 09/05/2008 21:11

Message withdrawn

mrsruffallo · 09/05/2008 21:14

It's not ideal but I think YABU- mother's choice

Blueskythinker · 09/05/2008 21:18

I personally wouldn't give my DC tea or coffee (although mine don't even get fruit shoots), but I don't think you can judge other people (well yes, you can judge, just don't say anything).

Disregard Cappucino. She obviously has a vested interest

PinkTulips · 09/05/2008 21:24

dd finishs every mug of tea i have as she loves it, she also takes sips of my coffee when we're out (don't drink it much at home)

don't see any problem with it, dd is 3 and she never gets hyper from it (i don't tend to get any effects like that from coffee either for that matter).

YABU, tis no harm to the child and is absolutely none of your business

Original poster
JohnsonsIsBest · 09/05/2008 21:25

I had no doubt that Cappucino would be of the YABU variety!

Thanks for all the feedback, I will back off and sit at a table trying to write down my sips/cups formula.... with a cup of Mocha...

OP posts:
Blueskythinker · 09/05/2008 21:33

I reckon that a sip must equate to approx 10-15 ml (based on 2 - 3 medicine spoons). Any more than that, and you are describing a gulp. My Denby mugs take 250 ml each (sad I know, but I have just measured it).

That means to have 2 cups of coffee a day, the child must be having 35 to 50 sips a day.
[pathetic emoticon]

WallOfSilence · 09/05/2008 21:43

I bet there are aspects of your parenting your friend disagrees with...

Each to their own.

I would say 35 to 50 sips a day is far more than any child would have!!

theyoungvisiter · 09/05/2008 22:03

agree with the others that it's none of your business.

And I don't think that secretly switching them to decaff is a good solution! Decaff isn't that good for you either. It contains a lot of chemicals other than caffeine.