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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... to think that a 2yr old should't be drinking coffee?

64 replies

JohnsonsIsBest · 09/05/2008 20:20

a friend of mine is quite oblivious to the fact that her DD drinks approx 2 cups of coffee a day by taking sips from Mummy's mug.
There have even been occasions when she has had her own teeny cup (an espresso one) to be luike Mummy.

Am i being unreasonable? i don't think so as i've read that even one cup of coffee can affect your sleep patterns as an adult.

Her DD doens't sleep well...

I have hinted on a number of occasions that 'oh dear she's just had a sip - you won't sleep tonight' and so on but, oh I don't know, she doesn't seem to get it.

Am i being unreasonable?

OP posts:
PinkTulips · 09/05/2008 22:44

if your going to get all het up about chemicals in a child system then caffeine is the least of your worries anyway. E numbers have been conclusively linked to ADHD, start checking your food labels and you might be a little at how many chemicals (far more damaging than caffeine) your own family has been consuming.

my kids eat mostly organic, non wheat, non cows milk, low salt, E number and miscellaneous chemicals free foods. as all their having is caffeine and suger i'd say i'm doing a bit better than most parents out there who don't see any harm in anything that claims to be 'suger free' or 'low fat' on the packet

PinkTulips · 09/05/2008 22:46

'child's system'

tori32 · 09/05/2008 22:57

Yes YABU because unless she asks for your opinion it is none of your business!
She has sips FFS! Do your children have a completely none chemical diet? Never have sweets/chocolate (which has as much caffiene in it btw!) biscuits? The odd cup of coffee will not harm the child. Actually giving coke and fizzy drinks is worse as it fills them up so they eat less and get less calories than they need.

If she wants to give her it regularly though she should use decaff imo.

Twinklemegan · 09/05/2008 23:01

Try telling my 21 month old DS. He's a little bugger for grabbing my nearly empty mug and taking a swig . How can such a young child possibly like coffee - I don't even really like it. Beats me.

triflenorks · 09/05/2008 23:01

DS and I would visit my Gran every day. I would leave ds with my gran and her cup of coffee whilst I hoovered/made the beds/her evening meal etc. I hadn't realised that my gran was letting him drink sips of her coffee until I walked in and caught him saying, mine, mine, now nannna, ta, with his hands stretched out. i got wise to that and started giving him a VERY milky decaf of his own, whilst I did my Nans chores.

harman · 09/05/2008 23:11

Message withdrawn

Lollypopzmummy · 09/05/2008 23:18

So, you object to a child drinking caffeine. . . a naturally occurring chemical, yet, merely judging by your nickname, you're happy to smother your own child in plastics and other random chemicals to "clean" them?
Think you may have to have a look at your own life before judging other's, don't you think?
I know it's difficult for people to understand but, as has already been pointed out, there's not a lot of difference in caffeine content between coffee and tea so, unless you're really aware of the chemical basis of everything, which I'm guessing you're not if you're using Johnson's products, then maybe just don't jump on your high horse about this sort of thing.

Are you really sure that this child is having 2 cups of coffee every day, through sipping?

Use your brain please.

minouminou · 09/05/2008 23:31

FWIW, the half-life of caffeine in a child's body is virtually that of an adult from only a few months old, so even if the child was drinking a full-on quart of the good stuff (i'm exaggerating here, let's just assume a regular cup) at, say, noon, it'd be gone by 6 or 7pm.
i've let DS have a drop of my coffee simply because he asks repeatedly...he pulls a face and goes off the idea for a few days
your hints are probably not falling on deaf ears, OP, she's probably choosing to ignore you because they do sound rather tiresome and intrusive

Original poster
JohnsonsIsBest · 10/05/2008 01:01

i am very happy to have been in my place everyone
thank you for pointing out how very unreasonable I am being

I listen and will stop

FTR my DS has minimal caffiene products, and i'll try to keep it that way
But POINT TAKEN

OP posts:
branflake81 · 10/05/2008 06:22

I was going to say YABU but just read your post above

I thnk there are worse things to be drinking. I loved tea as a child.

If it was vodka, on the other hand, there would be cause for concern.....!

CilC · 10/05/2008 06:44

YANBU I do not understand why parents can not say no? Yes children are bombarded with e numbers and chemicals in their food, but if we try and avoid them then less will be consumed. To actively encourage a 2 year old to have caffeine is certainly not something I would do and yes I would ask about it. You can not change your friend's mind but I think it is good to be challenged and questioned - how else do we learn things from another perspective.

Original poster
JohnsonsIsBest · 10/05/2008 13:31

thanks for your comment CilC

i was concerned but i have climbed down now as i realise its not thec crime of the century

it isn't the only thing my friend does that i disagree with and i'm sure viceversa

OP posts:
glaskham · 10/05/2008 13:41

My ds has been having the last mouthful of DH's coffee in a morning since he was 2....it used to drive me bonkers, but it's now something they do together, DS will sit on daaddy's knee waiting for the last bit. Its one or 2 mouthfuls a morning, he never gets any hyperness or anything. DD has just turned 2 and i dont mind DH allowing her a mouthful either....they get far much more crap from some of the other things they have!! and its nice to watch the pair of them share with daddy!!

if they want a hot drink at any other part of the day its a warm milk or sometimes a very milky decaf tea.... but i dotn see the harm in it at all!!

lardylumps · 10/05/2008 13:44

I am suck a bad mother i dip dd dummy in my frothy milk when i go out and have a coffee. Never the coffee just the milk and chocolate sprinkles. She loves it (has started dropping her dummy in my cup at home now though and she is only one...

Crunchie · 10/05/2008 14:26

my kids have 'babychinnos' when they go out, but this is just frothy milk!! DD1 likes coffee and will have the odd sip or two, but she is 9

cory · 10/05/2008 14:28

I wouldn't had let my own have coffee at such a young age. Yet in view of the statistics quoted by Cappuccino, perhaps it would feel a bit hypocritical to comment on the coffee and not say anything if they were given chocolate or cola drinks. And I am sure I have sat next to toddlers eating chocolate buttons without trying to interfere in any way.

Saturn74 · 10/05/2008 14:32

DS2(10)has a wheat and dairy allergy.

Since he was about 8, he has enjoyed treating himself to the occasional soya decaff cappuccino when we go to town.

We are often confronted by judgy tutters, who feel it is their place to loudly comment about the evils of children drinking coffee.

Things are not always as they seem.

Nighbynight · 10/05/2008 14:38

YANBU to think this is wrong.
I was given coffee as a child by my bl*y stupid mother. As an older child, I had mood swings. By the time I was doing my A levels, I had full blown depression that lasted for 10 years.
I stopped drinking coffee altogether in my early 20s, because I was having violent mood swings, and nightmares, which were then somewhat alleviated.
I drink coffee now, but my children don't. I am fairly sure that drinking it as a child contributed to my problems. It is not a children's drink, and parents should just say no.

TheFallenMadonna · 10/05/2008 14:39

I do understand why, and I'm really not judging, but I might stifle a giggle at an 8 year old ordering a "soya decaff cappuccino" (says the woman whose son asked "is it buffalo mozarella" )

Saturn74 · 10/05/2008 16:07

TFM, I know, the ordering is amusing, and DS2 does think he is a bit of a hot shot!
The staff are very indulgent of him, luckily.

It's the couples draped over each other in the corner, reading Proust aloud, and only breaking off in order to criticise my parenting skills re lack of caffeine restriction that piss me off.

TheFallenMadonna · 10/05/2008 16:09

God - a coffee shop with soya decaff capp-drinking children and Proust-spouting Bright Young Things .

I would disgrace myself I'm afraid

PinkTulips · 10/05/2008 16:20

jesus, where do you live?

i don't think our local coffee shop would even know what soya milk is and as for proust-spouting, i imagine it would be very dimly viewed by the farmers, buliders and truckers in for their sambo and tea

Saturn74 · 10/05/2008 16:44
Grin
allytjd · 10/05/2008 17:34

There is some research going on at the moment into giving children with ADHD caffe3ine to CALM them down, after all, ritalin is a stimulant.

I think all those adults who still drink fizzy drinks were not introduced to tea and coffee at an early enough age so i think YABU.

belgo · 10/05/2008 17:37

I agree with cappuchino. I give my kids hot chocolate and call it 'special coffee' to be like mummy.

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