To end friendship because I can't stand her husband?

[DefrostedAccount]

I have a mum friend who I get on with well, but I just cannot stand her husband. He makes me feel uncomfortable, makes my family feel uncomfortable, my friend who met him said she was uncomfortable around him. He's just so odd. Creepy almost. He's always there and I just always feel like I can't be myself. When I do spend time with her on her own it's lovely but it's not very often. I can't exactly say to her 'sorry I don't want to spend time with your DH, can we only spend time together just us', or can I? I know her well enough that that would go down like a lead balloon. Has anyone else had a similar scenario? Feel like cutting ties, and the kids are all in the same friendship group so could just limit it to hanging out with her at birthday parties and group events.... thoughts?

Exactly. If you want to make individual plans with her, make it clear it’s her you want to see, and that it’s not a child occasions — suggest an after-work drink or something.

You can tell the difference with a modicum of reflection.

If it's just that he doesn't do small talk or take hints, that's ND.

Controlling or insidious behaviour is different.

I've already brought it up with the headteacher and she spoke to friend (now presumably ex friend) and apparently "She's fine, don't worry!"