Not farting in front of DH

[Dancingatthepinkponyclub]

Not really an AIBU but I love hearing what others think!

Have been with my DH for 18 years and have never intentionally farted in front of him. I mean I know it’s impossible to hold every fart in but he’s never actually heard one! If I need to I would go in another room or be discreet. My mum and sister are the same and a couple of friends. Also my DH is the same and won’t in front of me unless he does by mistake!

I know it’s natural and everyone does it but I’d never want to endure someone’s else’s fart nor make them endure mine! It hardly makes you attractive does it! That being said I wouldn’t fart in front of anyone… I mean maybe the dog!

what do you think?!

Farts are up there as one of my top 'are we compatible' requirements. I just don't think anyone can have a successful relationship if one parter thinks farts are funny and the other thinks they are disgusting and will never do them in front of their OH.

Agreed, it gives me the ick. I couldn’t have sex with someone that did that for fun 🤢

My partner and I make up entire songs about our dog farting, with sound effects. I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t think they were funny!

Is it just me whose farts rarely smell?

They’re forced to breathe it in even if you do it silently

Unless they like a bit of anal-to-mouth?

Farting with intent? That’s a new one on me! How can someone fart with intent? the body builds up gas from the foods we eat, it has to come out, it’s a natural body function. Yes, I agree it’s inappropriate to fart in the company of strangers and friends, but if you can’t feel comfortable enough with family to let it go there’s something seriously wrong with relationships here.
We’re not piggish about it, I.E. we don’t see hilarity in rasping one off like some folk do, but we don’t feel ashamed or uncomfortable, we just say excuse me and apologise if it stinks.
As an IBS sufferer I’ve been in agony holding it in in the company of friends, I’d hate to think I had to do that all the time with close family.

In our house, we proudly let rip, with the correct response from the fartee to the farter being along the lines of “Good arse, darling!” or similar.

It’s the only way.

* "*I agree it’s inappropriate to fart in the company of strangers and friends, but if you can’t feel comfortable enough with family to let it go there’s something seriously wrong with relationships here."

Comfortable enough to spew the particulate contents of your intestines at them? 🙄

No thanks. We believe in being at least as courteous and considerate with family as we are with friends and strangers, if not even more so. Being close and loving doesn't mean "let it all hang out with no dignity."

I worked with someone that could queef at will! That was her party trick!
We had some hilarious moments at work, (then I'd have some bollocking texts following that, for making her do it, as they were still making their way out while she was shopping in Morrisons!!!) 🤣🤣🤣
And try as I might and believe me, I tried, I could never get the hang of it!!

I’ve never farted in front of my husband and we’ve been together for 30 years. i just think it’s a really unattractive thing to do. It helps that I’m not remotely windy.

Wow, that's so interesting.
I can't see how it would be a coincidence, so I'm very impressed, and although I hate the idea of going wheat free, what you have experienced, is making me consider doing a trial.
Thank you.

Sorry, I forgot to ask, how long after giving wheat up, did you start to notice the difference and benefits?

Hey, I didn't know bum physio was a thing!
I do practice pelvic squeezes, so is it something like that, but concentrating on a different set of muscles?
I wonder if there is an instructional YouTube vid'.....

I've read most of this thread with interest.

IF my guffs could be controlled, I surely would, as I do find my lack of self control embarrassing.

Unfortunately, I have absolutely no choice, and it's not just with my partner, it can be in a crowded supermarket, the quietest of libraries, or literally anywhere.

Believe me, if I could prevent a guff, I would.

I am jealous of those who are saying they can delay for a minute or two to allow them to exit the room.
I can't delay for a second.

What I'm trying to say, is it's not a choice for everyone.
I'm certainly not intentionally being rude.

So after a lifetime of this, yes I can laugh with embarrassment, when it's in front of my partner, as he knows it's not a case of me being disrespectful, and like another pp partner, he really wouldn't make me feel bad for it, as that would be disrespectful.

Maybe give a little thought before judging anyone about anything.

Same here OP

I agree. Why would not wanting to fart in front of your partner, parents or granny be a sign of dysfunctional relationships? That's a very weird barometer for what is and isn’t seriously wrong with relationships. I have never deliberately farted in front of anyone ever in my life. 😯

Agree.

People who don't censor themselves and just let it all hang out aren't who we would want to emulate. It's quite possible to have a good marriage, good relationship and close family without losing basic standards of decorum.

If one's asshole needs inspection, why not go to a nurse or doctor instead of one's sexual or romantic partner? JFC.

The old "he's seen me give birth so what difference does anything else make?" rationale is a very low bar indeed.

Same here!!

I’ve been with my partner for almost 10 years, I don’t fart in front of him, I have done a few times accidentally and I’ve been so embarrassed, I’m not even sure why! I go to a different room discreetly🤭

Yes the birth thing is completely different. What next, he hears me fart all the time he might as well see me on the toilet for a No. 2 (and yes I know some people don’t mind but I would!).

I fart in front of DH & DC…. but try not to in front of anyone else. At home I just want to be relaxed and not worry about that kind of thing.

I mean, if I feel one coming I might go out the room to do it but I’d not worry too much or hold it in uncomfortably.

I'd rather maintain my dignity and a bit of mystique. To me, that is relaxing.

No more than one to two weeks. Good luck.

Pull my finger