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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To alert LA/School/Social Services

140 replies

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 15:40

Yesterday while I was doing the school run I witnessed a dad shouting horribly (and horrible things) to a poor little boy. You could hear the boy screaming from a block away. I was in a rush, and really didn't want to confront this angry man, so just kept walking with my son.

Today, I saw the same boy (I didn't see him yesterday, only heard him) but he had the most horrible black eye and the rest of his face was incredibly swollen.

I'm sure both are connected but I have no evidence. Who can I alert about this?

OP posts:
FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 14/02/2025 15:43

Speak to the school
They should already have concerns about the bruising
You overhearing the yelling will add to their concerns

FrogOfFrogHall · 14/02/2025 15:45

Do you know who they are? If not do you know what school the boy attends? If you do I think I'd report to the school, if you say about the bruising you've seen they stand a better chance of being able to identify who he is for safeguarding.
It doesn't matter that you don't have evidence, it's for the authorities to investigate just be truthful about what you have seen and heard.

Hibernatingtilspring · 14/02/2025 15:49

You could try school, though if theres no way of identifying the child you would need to report to the police. Social services wouldn't be able to investigate to find out who the child was if unknown but the police could (not guaranteed it would be successful but they have more options than SS)

TotallyAddictedToCoffee · 14/02/2025 16:07

I once witnessed a man assaulting his son in the car behind me while we were stopped at traffic lights - I reported it online to the police and rang the school (I knew the school from the jumper the boy was wearing) and told them, they knew who I meant sadly

The police went to the school and had a meeting with the Head and the boys parents - I've no idea the outcome but I'm glad I reported it

You have nothing to lose by reporting it @Usedphone

Original poster
Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:12

Hibernatingtilspring · 14/02/2025 15:49

You could try school, though if theres no way of identifying the child you would need to report to the police. Social services wouldn't be able to investigate to find out who the child was if unknown but the police could (not guaranteed it would be successful but they have more options than SS)

I know his name and year, he went to nursery with my DS.

OP posts:
Jellycatspyjamas · 14/02/2025 16:16

I’d flag to the school and to social services, they’ll be able to find him through the school and it means there’s a net if the school by chance don’t report to social services. Given it’s coming up to the weekend speaking to the police wouldn’t hurt either because they can check on him more quickly than school or social work.

DaisyChain505 · 14/02/2025 16:18

Yes yes yes a hundred times over report what you heard or saw.

One of the contributing reasons we see the awful stories in the news about children slipping through the net when being abused is because people didn’t report small parts of the puzzle that would have added up to be a huge horrific picture.

TuesdayRubies · 14/02/2025 16:31

PLEASE call the school and SS now OP. Please do not delay

TuesdayRubies · 14/02/2025 16:32

And I agree as it's coming up to the weekend, I'd ring the police and ask them to do a welfare check. Especially if you cannot get hold of the school.

Original poster
Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:34

TuesdayRubies · 14/02/2025 16:32

And I agree as it's coming up to the weekend, I'd ring the police and ask them to do a welfare check. Especially if you cannot get hold of the school.

Just called the school no answer (left a message)

OP posts:
Original poster
Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:37

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:34

Just called the school no answer (left a message)

Show quote history

Also I know his first name not surname so would be difficult to ask the police to do a welfare check

OP posts:
LavenderFields7 · 14/02/2025 16:40

Yes please please report to safeguarding lead at the school 🙏

OutIsay · 14/02/2025 16:40

Google MASH team and the area you are in. There should be a number for the general public. Give them all the info you have. They will have the contact of the DSL in school.

caramac04 · 14/02/2025 16:43

Agree with PP. MASH team will contact school DSL. Hopefully school have already contacted Social Care but may be gathering evidence. What you witnessed will help.

tearsandtiaras · 14/02/2025 16:43

Contact out of hours at your local authority Childrens social care. Report now

If you can't find it call nspcc and report

katedan · 14/02/2025 16:43

As it is half term next week contact school and police as school might not pick up now and the police will make an automatic referral to CSC. Please make the call today.

DonningMyHardHat · 14/02/2025 16:44

Yes, I would call or do an online referral to MASH/IFD/whatever your area calls it. If you google ‘children’s social care (name of your area/LA)’ it will come straight up.

Intheband · 14/02/2025 16:45

Most schools have an emergency number on their websites that is a mobile that someone on the safeguarding team will be manning.

lnks · 14/02/2025 16:45

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:37

Also I know his first name not surname so would be difficult to ask the police to do a welfare check

Show quote history

Phone the police and SS now rather than posting on here. They will be able to find out who he is.

Thisismyalterego · 14/02/2025 16:46

I agree with PPS who say Google out of hours team at the LA. In this area we have just finished for half-term so our school office won't be manned until we return to work. You could email school as the DSL should pick up emails this week. Even if the school has raised a concern, your observation from yesterday will be an important piece of the puzzle.

elliejjtiny · 14/02/2025 16:49

I would always talk to the school in the first instance as the school would know the family and the circumstances. In this case it does sound as if social services need to be informed but in some cases there will be things the school would know about. For example you might see a tiny child walking to school on their own and think you need to report, but the school know that the child looks about 5 but is actually 8 and they have a parent who is housebound who is watching to make sure they get to school safely.

Chocolate85 · 14/02/2025 16:54

The message you left might not get picked up until after half term. When I’ve done Safeguarding training we’ve always been told that you need to think of what is the worst case scenario if you don’t report it? In this case, the child could be seriously harmed so you need to report it to MASH, social services, police. Do not leave it. Poor child.

Kingoftheroad · 14/02/2025 16:58

Emergency social work NOW they have to act. Police NOW

To be honest, I wouldn’t have ignored this yesterday no matter what I had on.

lnks · 14/02/2025 17:01

Kingoftheroad · 14/02/2025 16:58

Emergency social work NOW they have to act. Police NOW

To be honest, I wouldn’t have ignored this yesterday no matter what I had on.

I agree. I always quite dismayed at poster who see potential abuse of a child and the first action they take is to post on MN rather than call SS or the police.

Margorett · 14/02/2025 17:03

You have a moral obligation to do something about this, you may be the only person that can help this innocent child. Do the right thing and go speak to school. I cannot even understand why you haven't in all honesty.

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