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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To alert LA/School/Social Services

140 replies

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 15:40

Yesterday while I was doing the school run I witnessed a dad shouting horribly (and horrible things) to a poor little boy. You could hear the boy screaming from a block away. I was in a rush, and really didn't want to confront this angry man, so just kept walking with my son.

Today, I saw the same boy (I didn't see him yesterday, only heard him) but he had the most horrible black eye and the rest of his face was incredibly swollen.

I'm sure both are connected but I have no evidence. Who can I alert about this?

OP posts:
Original poster
Usedphone · 14/02/2025 17:04

Well nobody is picking up anymore... And the out of hours has been on hold for 30mins

OP posts:
lnks · 14/02/2025 17:06

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 17:04

Well nobody is picking up anymore... And the out of hours has been on hold for 30mins

then you call the non emergency police number and they will contact SS.

If it was so bad, why did you wait 24 hours to do anything about it?

OhBow · 14/02/2025 17:10

Thank you for doing this.

MajorCarolDanvers · 14/02/2025 17:15

Go straight to the police. This child is in danger

MajorCarolDanvers · 14/02/2025 17:16

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:37

Also I know his first name not surname so would be difficult to ask the police to do a welfare check

Show quote history

Let the police worry about that

Mehmeh22 · 14/02/2025 17:22

Call police or MASH team. There will be an out of hours number. They will contact the school if needed.

PrincessScarlett · 14/02/2025 17:22

Thank you for reporting OP. I just wish some of the neighbours and passer byers had done that in the case of Sara Sharif.

If you don't know the boy's surname are you able to find out from someone else? If not, provide as much info as you can to social services. If they are already known to social services they will know who they are. Such a shame it's half term so school won't pick up the message. Is there an email for the head teacher at all?

lnks · 14/02/2025 17:25

PrincessScarlett · 14/02/2025 17:22

Thank you for reporting OP. I just wish some of the neighbours and passer byers had done that in the case of Sara Sharif.

If you don't know the boy's surname are you able to find out from someone else? If not, provide as much info as you can to social services. If they are already known to social services they will know who they are. Such a shame it's half term so school won't pick up the message. Is there an email for the head teacher at all?

She doesn't really need to find out his name or try and find an email for the head. She could call the police right now and they would be able to take action very quickly.

I'm actually concerned the OP isn't doing that. Especially seeing as she has waited over 24 hours to do anything at all.

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 14/02/2025 17:26

Doesn't your DS know his surname?

Original poster
Usedphone · 14/02/2025 17:29

Duty social worker said that without a name (surname) or address there's nothing that can be done :/

OP posts:
CatG021024 · 14/02/2025 17:30

Rather than posting on Mumsnet, you should have gone into school or contacted social services immediately. This child is now left all weekend. If you had done this at 15:40 when you posted, school could have confirmed his details to social care and they could have visited the child. Now, you need to contact the Police, who may or may not be able to locate this child but as school have finished, probably for half term, this may be impossible for another 10 days.

YellowTassels · 14/02/2025 17:32

Always better to report and be wrong than to not report.

HoppityBun · 14/02/2025 17:33

Please do. Years ago I saw a man verbally assaulting a little boy, I didn’t know who he was and it was in a city centre. That little boy’s traumatic response has stayed with me. If you know who the man is or who the little boy is, please report to Social Care.

lnks · 14/02/2025 17:35

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 17:29

Duty social worker said that without a name (surname) or address there's nothing that can be done :/

This is not true. Call the police. I worked in schools for years. The police will be able to contact the key holders for the school at the very least and it can be taken from there.

Hall84 · 14/02/2025 17:37

The school usually have an emergency number for concerns about a child out of hours. Is that not on the answerphone or the website?

TheWaterIsEverywhere · 14/02/2025 17:38

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 17:29

Duty social worker said that without a name (surname) or address there's nothing that can be done :/

Call the police. If they have been involved with the family previously, then a first name, school and approx age may be enough for them to locate an address and do a welfare check.

TheRealTina · 14/02/2025 17:41

Do it....after someone posted here recently about a man shouting swear words to his crying baby, I am all for it men to be held responsible for their evildoing ( praying the mother won't be made a victim of such a decision by any authority )

Panickingnowhelp · 14/02/2025 17:42

Why are you even questioning if you should report it?
I would have reported the shouting and have reported similar in the past.
Safeguarding concerns are not meant for us to be judge and jury, its about reporting anything that doesn't feel right with you. It could be a piece of the puzzle they need, it could add to a long list of concerns, it could be the first thing made aware to the authorities about this family - each one is so important.
If anything concerns you about any child you report it, if it's nothing then nothing will come of it.
It's everyone's duty to report concerns.

TheRealTina · 14/02/2025 17:43

PrincessScarlett · 14/02/2025 17:22

Thank you for reporting OP. I just wish some of the neighbours and passer byers had done that in the case of Sara Sharif.

If you don't know the boy's surname are you able to find out from someone else? If not, provide as much info as you can to social services. If they are already known to social services they will know who they are. Such a shame it's half term so school won't pick up the message. Is there an email for the head teacher at all?

neighbours did her screaming and reported multiple times. Also turned up to his door and he told them to go away.

TheLurpackYears · 14/02/2025 17:45

You can ring NSPCC and they will triage what you report and give you a reference number which you then give to the child's school.
You may feel it is more appropriate to go straight to the police though.

newyearnewme2025 · 14/02/2025 17:46

it always surprises me when i see these posts... like do you really need to ask? if you know who the boy is, i would contact either the school or social services, give them as much information as you have and leave it too them.

bigTillyMint · 14/02/2025 17:49

If the child arrived in school with a black eye, the school should have actioned their safeguarding policy and hopefully a referral will have been made if they are concerned about him.

lnks · 14/02/2025 17:50

This reply has been deleted

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Jellycatspyjamas · 14/02/2025 17:54

Duty social worker said that without a name (surname) or address there's nothing that can be done

Thats likely to be the case for out of hours, they really only have capacity for the most immediate and serious issues and won’t have access to relevant databases. Call again during working hours and the duty worker can enquire with the school.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 14/02/2025 17:54

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 17:29

Duty social worker said that without a name (surname) or address there's nothing that can be done :/

The safeguarding email address will be monitored over half term (assuming it's the last day in your area) - email the school now, the email will be on the website and probably be 'safeguarding@ schoolname.etc.'

Also email the social services emergency, as that'll ensure there's an email trail when somebody who isn't the current crap duty SW sees it - and you can contact the Police.

Doing all three will maximise the opportunity of the child being identified and seen urgently - especially if Alfie (or whatever his name is) has been off with a tummy bug or 'fell over' according to Mum today.