Woman shouted at me for parking in a disabled spot

[AusMumhere]

I parked in a disabled spot at the supermarket today. A woman about four cars away shouted at me and said 'that's a wheelie spot'. I shouted back 'I have a permit'. She then yelled 'where's ya walker?'. I said 'not all disabilities are visible'. I hate confrontation of any kind.
Should I have walked away or should I have responded? I'm still in shock that I shouted.

i had to chuckle this last weekend. I drive myself and My elderly mum everywhere, she has a crappy hip, but i'm the BB holder due to mobility issues.

I took her shopping and she carefully got out the car, sorted her bags then toddled off to get a trolley as i pushed my door open and went to turn to put my feet out. Some lady piped up "You should do that, not your poor old mum" pointing to her picking a trolley out.

I ignored as mom came back with trolley, opened my back door and handed me my crutches so i could get out and stand up, steadying me as i straightened up. Lady just looked like a deer in the headlights and scuttled off.

The assumption that its the 70yo with a badge, and not the healthy looking 40yo in the car always tickles me.

Yes that is why I was asking, because I stated in my post that it was fine what that person was doing, and was not sure if the poster who highlighted my post, was agreeing, or disagreeing with what I wrote.

Not to mention the fact that many invisible illness diagnoses around today in their day were just dismissed as "hysteria/all in your head" and maybe the person suffering being considered self indulgent or neurotic. or else shoved into an institution. MS was once considered this way, as was depression and PMS/PMDD. Then it was the turn of ME/CFS and fibromyalgia to be vilified in this way.

Just say "If you have an issue with where I've parked speak to owners of the carpark" if it happens again. No need to justify yourself to members of the public with no authority over the parking arrangements.

you can park in one if picking up a disabled person such as my friend with her DM at Bingo.

What a pathetic couple. Do they pay for sole use of ‘their spot’ so no one else uses it? No

What happened afterwards? Hopefully Morrisons have banned them!

I know. My comment was in response to a discussion about the disabled person waiting in the car while the person with them did an errand

I know it must be annoying to be questioned by strangers. But strangers do this because so many able bodied people do park in disabled parking spaces. And the absolute worst is parents collecting children.

But that wouldn't make any sense. Then the disabled person being collected in the car would be forced to walk further to be collected by car..

It's as much about the disabled person getting back into the car as getting out of it!

@Rosscameasdoody yep it’s the elderly who hurl abuse at my friend with her autistic DS. They are unaware of the hidden disabilities and what conditions are now included under the blue badge scheme.

I really hate ignorant people- especially the elderly.

They probably park on yellow zigzag lines outside their DC’s school(s)

Someone posted a photo on nextdoor of a bouncy castle company van in a disabled space with the caption they were reporting the driver to his boss.

The driver replied “Thank you for the free advertising. I am my own boss. If you want to see my disability here it is.” He posted a photo of himself with his trouser rolled up displaying a prosthetic limb (silver pole leg). Followed up by “It was damaged so badly whilst I was serving in Iraq I had to have it amputated.”

I wish I could have seen the original posters face!

It is always parents collecting children who park in disabled spaces without Blue Badges. I used to say something, but I got fed up of having abuse hurled at me. They would always scream about invisible disabilities, but they NEVER had a Ble Badge.
I am not ignorant about invisible disabilities. I have visible and invisible disabilities. But you need a Blue Badge to park in a disabled space.

Yep! Endangering any kids who walk to school. It is incredibly selfish people.

I once parked in a parent and child space as a last resort because there were no disabled spaces left. I was followed into Morrisons by a woman insisting I couldn’t park there and demanding I move. She made an awful scene hurling abuse at me and the poor customer service adviser who tried to intervene to tell her I wasn’t doing anything wrong !!

I was replying to a poster who said that her friend used her own badge to park in a disabled space to wait for their DM who wasn’t disabled. It’s misuse of the badge to use it for the benefit of someone else. If you’re the badge holder and you’re not getting out of the car, you shouldn’t be parking in a disabled bay or displaying the badge.

@Rosscameasdoody That is dreadful!
I suspect the parents who hurled abuse at me did have children with ASD or ADHD. But unless you have a Blue Badge, you can not park there. They are not for anyone with a disability. You have to meet the criteria so your disability is sever enough to merit a Blue Badge.

I'd memorise a few potential comebacks.

"That's a wheelie spot" - "I know - that's why I parked in it"
"Where's your wheelie" - "Where's your manners?" or "None of your business" or (as you said) "Not all disabilities are visible and not all disabled people are in a wheelchair"

Unfortunately shopping centres, supermarkets, etc, don't often police their own disabled spaces so I'd be pleased if someone did call them out when they're misused.

That said, this woman sounds really rude and YANBU to be annoyed at her.

Someone shouted at me and my DM one day as we got out of the car in a disabled space. Something along the lines of "well you don't look very disabled do you?", just as my DM opened the boot and extracted my brother's massive wheelchair to pick him out of the back seat. DM just smiled sweetly and said "well, that's very kind of you - what about this one? Does he look disabled enough for you?". Cue a lot of blushing and hurriedly walking away!

If someone politely enquires whether you're entitled to use it, I don't have an issue, but any passive aggressive, or just aggressive, comments deserve the same in return.

You can get them on Amazon - some differently worded ones but the basic message is the same. I have a couple of friends who display them with the badge on the dashboard specifically to stop nosy parkers from challenging.

I am sorry this happened to you. You did not need to justify anything. You did nothing wrong. Try to forget about it x

If someone demands to see your Blue Badge, then demand to see their parking attendant/traffic warden/police ID.

Some people do get silly when it comes to BB spaces. I was walking past the security station in a supermarket and man there was telling the security guard "they have a Blue Badge, but it is not the sort of car a disabled person would be driving". So only certain types of cars can park there now? You can tell who is disabled by the car they have?
My friend has a BB, and she has a 2 seater sporty car.

It was the DM who was the disabled one so I assumed she was the disabled badge owner.

One of my friend's DM is disabled, goes to bingo once a fortnight and friend goes shopping whilst her DM is at bingo - she parks in another car park as the shops are quarter of a mile away. On collecting her DM, friend parks her car in a disabled bay, displays the blue badge. No one (yet) has questioned this. Her DM uses a walker which probably keeps some potential abusers to keep their mouths shut.

I’m a wheelchair user, but behind the wheel of the car I don’t present as disabled. On the occasions when someone has said ‘you don’t look very disabled’ I’ve waited until I’m in my wheelchair and if they’re still around, as I wheel past, I say ‘do I look disabled enough now?’

I watched a documentary about "one punch killers" a few years ago that featured a retired bloke who challenged someone who was legitimately parked in a disabled space, punched him once and the poor bloke died. Imagine getting so irate about something you are so wrong about.

I have a SUV type car, and l get this attitude quite often. It usually shuts people up when I tell them that it’s the smallest car in which I can fit a wheelchair lift. Also amazes me how people automatically assume that if you’re disabled you’re driving a motability car - I’ve had a few barbed comments about how my type of vehicle ‘shouldn’t be allowed on Motability, as the tax payer is footing the bill’ And in the process displaying how little they know about Motability, because it’s actually nothing to do with the tax payer !!