To ask how many kids you have, their age, and how many hours you work a week?

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I'm curious how normal it is to work full time, 40+ hours a week with kids. I feel like everyone's life would be so much better if I did even just one day less. What do you do for an evening meal? I find this hardest and spend a fortune on convenience food (not take aways, but super easy comfort food) for the family. Does it matter if its a career? As in its worth it because it will pay off long term or if its just a job and you simply need to.

Aibu unreasonable to try and work out what is normal?

1 child age 3 . Full time hours at my workplace are 37.5, so I requested working 35 hours a week (making me ever so slightly part-time). I often find myself working 37.5 hours, or a lot more, in practice (logging on after my child has gone to bed).

I find it's only doable because I largely WFH and my DH has a similarity flexible job and does an equal amount of child stuff.

There's no way it would be sustainable with any more children, so it's one of the many reasons we are staying one and done.

For many years I worked a stupid amount of hours 56+ on call whilst with a small child and cooking from scratch etc. I acknowledged towards the end of last year I was burnt out and made major changes I can now see I have been burnt of for at least 14 years, but maybe longer.
I have been reflecting on this we talk about men taking more responsibility and so do, but others don't ExH I am looking at you. So women end up working full time and doing the majority of family work/admin.
I don't have an answer, but I called a halt to my own situation and am piecing myself back together.

31,27,19,14,11 and 10.

I don't work outside of the home anymore. I stopped when number 4 was born. I had originally planned to go back when they went to school but we've got into a routine that works for everyone. The youngest 4 are all very very sporty so the weekends are spent attending various sporting events which pretty much wipes them out for dh and me.

I've got one 8 month old DD, and would like more in the future. I'll be going back full time in June 😭😭 I'd give anything to drop to 3 days, but it's not financially viable unfortunately, especially as I'm the main earner.

If we have another child, my mum won't be able to have two of them two days a week, so I likely will have to drop part time then, as nursery won't be worth the cost.

It sucks women have to make this choice. I just want to raise my sweet baby, and I think it would be better for her :(

I'm a mental health nurse, so I'm really considering moving to a ward so I work long shifts. At least I can work less days.

5 and 9 year olds. I work 2 longer days of 8-5.30, and 2 short days 9 -3, 30 hours total. Mixed management/clinical role, so can do the 2 shorter days from home and do school drop off and pick up. My long days DH does drop off and they go to after school club.
I plan to go full time in about 5 years once youngest is in year 6 when they allowed to come and leave school on their own.
I did 2.5 days a week until youngest started primary. I do feel this has held my career back a bit as best roles are full time, but I wanted to spend time with them until they started school, nurseries near us are up to £100 a day, and after tax we wouldn't have been much better of with me being full time vs me doing 2.5 days - paying for 2 days nursery and other half day was worked flexibly across the week during nap times etc.

2 kids ages almost 2 and just turned 4, both at nursery part time. I work 24 hours a week but this is as a nurse so only 2x 12 hour shifts. I dropped to part time after second was born and it has changed all of our lives for the better, everyone is so much less stressed. On the days I’m working I usually make a dinner the night before, something everyone will eat and is easy to reheat, things like curry, chilli or pasta sauce etc with micro rice and pasta. My husband is great and more than capable of cooking them a meal but it takes me 5-10 minutes the night before to chuck everything in the slow cooker the night before for a few hours then put it in the fridge for the next night. It saves him coming home at 6pm with 2 starving and tired toddlers trying to cook a meal as of course I’m not home until 8-9pm so he is solo those days.

2 kids, 5 & 8. I worked 30ish hours a week till the youngest was 3.5, then started a new job which was 40-45 hours a week, though condensed into 4 days.

DH is on long term sick leave/likely to take medical retirement soon, but is still physically able to look after the kids, so that makes our childcare situation more manageable than if he were still working. Puts all the financial pressure on me though!

Mines grown up now and I work term time 8.30-5pm. When he was growing up I mostly did 4 days. When he was at primary I did 3 long and 2 short days so I could collect him from school. I also had a 1.5 hour commute.

2 children aged 6.5 and 10, I am a single parent with almost full custody (exH has EoW and frequently won’t even do that), I work full time 5 days a week in the office. No WFH except ad hoc, luckily my commute is v short.

I am lucky that I have a v senior job which pays well and has some degree of flexibility (lawyer) but it is bloody stressful and exhausting. I spend a lot on wrap around childcare.

Two DC aged 7 and 9, I'm 45 and I work full time - so Monday to Friday. The role is hybrid which is good - no way I could do it if I had to be in the office 9 to 5. Boss is v understanding too about childcare, he trusts me to do the job in hours that suit. That level of trust means I work even harder to do a good job!

As others have said, it depends on your job - WFH two days a week means washing gets done, meals prepped etc. Plus DH mostly WFH so that makes a difference. We're lucky to be able to drop the kids at school and they're in after school club three days a week. No family childcare support.

We have a cleaner who comes in fortnightly and keeps my sanity intact

We cope...but everything is planned to the smallest detail, and the routine is strict. It can be v stressful and exhausting, I often worry that there's more I should be doing with the kids. Ideally I'd do four days as I did before taking this job. But we have got used to the money and really need it right now.

Once I'm in my 50s I am hoping to go to part time again. I imagine that hitting the perimenopause is going to make a difference to my energy levels.

No advice, just solidarity ✊️

Two children: 3 and 1
40 + hours for an amercian company. I'm in office 3/4 days pw

It's hard and i dont know how long we can do it for.

I batch cook and we also instapot/ slow cook if wfh as while CM is amazing she doesnt do dinner (FML) so kids need to be fed as soon as they walk in the door at 5.45/6
Friday is fakeaway night and its prepreped meal.

It's bloody stressful and my job is awful - the company hates women and mothers, we have just had third round of layoffs office and morale is sub basement level.
I just want to crawl in a hole thinking about it tbh and im one of the "lucky" ones so fuck knows how everyone else is coping.

My kids are 22 and 17. I haven't worked for 8 years.

I have 1 toddler and do 20 hours BUT it's 5 days a week. And even I think 1 less day would be better for my family.

Most mums I know work part time. A few full time but they are the minority.

my kids are 16, 13 and 9 and I work 30 hours, DH works 40 hours.

I have one DD, who's nearly 10. I'm a lone parent so no choice but to work! I do 30 hours a week over 4 days - 3 on site and one WFH. Having that one day off in the week is probably what's keeping me sane at the minute, but financially it is a struggle so am toying with the idea of going back full time, maybe when she starts secondary.

In terms of evening meals, DD is fed at wraparound on her days there. She still raids the fridge/cupboards when she gets in though. We probably rely on quick/convenience foods more than we should!

5 kids aged 13, 13, 15, 15 and 17 and I work five days a week full time. Our contract is for 7 hours a day however part of my work is in events so two weeks of the year I'm working at least 70 hours a week and in the run up can be doing 45 a week. I've always worked full-time, it was really hard going when they were younger as I'd be dropping off, picking up (sometimes on three buses because I don't drive!) but now I mostly work from home.

3 kids 5,6 & 13 work full time (37hrs) but due to a demanding job more like 45-50hrs per week.

Sunday is my meal prep day. I spend the afternoon making up my lunches and a selection of dinners for the week. Make my teenager his fave egg and sausage bagels to go in the freezer so he has a hot breakfast every day for his commute to school.

get up at 5 eveyday to do make sure pack lunches and done And sometimes get the slow cooker running too (I ask DH to turn it to warm at a certain point in the day)

1 and 3, I work 9.30-5.00 with a 45 min commute each way when I'm in the office and 8.30-6 when working from home twice a week and sometimes also work 6-7.30am and/or 9pm onwards. Their nanny feeds them dinner at 5, I cook for my husband at 8 once the kids are in bed.

With 2 toddlers we do 72 hours total (I do 40hr in 4 days and DH does 32hr). Younger one has just gone from 3 days at daycare to 5 days so we'll both be FT soon when kids are 2.5y and 4y.

We both have high-trust, flexible jobs with some WFH and moveable starts/finishes to allow us to do pickups/dropoffs and get evening meal started. I might try to keep the compressed workload to allow one day a week DIY and housework without kids.

About 1/2 of people I know with preschool or primary kids have one parent PT. About 1/2 both parents are FT (but with flexible jobs).

2 in primary, work 21 hours over 3 days. It’s a nice balance I think. I don’t know any mums who works full time with little kids.

Two aged 9 and 11, both in primary school. I work 39 hours a week (FT) and I do 2 days wfh and I have flexi time so I can drop them off and they go to after school for a few hours most days.

I work 36/38 hours per week since mine were 5, 7 & 8 DH worked 30 hours per week and did the school pick up then went full time when the youngest was 11ish - it was when the opportunity came up. Plus he WFH from when the youngest was 9.

We both work 40 hour weeks but one of those is shifts, including weekends, and one of those includes 2-3 says WFH. This means our weekdays aren't full on needing 8-6 childcare. It's normal for both parents to be full time in my experience but just with different working patterns, rather than two office workwrs with long commutes.

I have two children aged 14 and 12. I've recently increased my hours to 28 hours per week (four full days per week). I used to do 50% (17.5 hours per week).
For us, this works well. DH works crazy hours and earns a lot, so it's better for us that I work part time and take care of the chores. I'm happy to do this.
It gives us all a bit of breathing space and takes the pressure off. On my day off, I tend to batch cook, do some laundry, tidy up etc. If I make a couple of big dishes on my day off, it means we can just reheat food when we're both working. I'd much rather do this than eat ready meals.