How can you be addressed as he/him she/her or they/them

[Yalta]

AIBU that you cannot be addressed as he/him she/her or they/them

These are references. Surely you would use someone’s actual name to address them or just a greeting.

Or maybe I am missing something. Can someone tell me how someone uses these to address someone

“Hello He”

“Good morning She”

“Good afternoon They

How are you today”

Or writings to you

Dear He/Him They/Them She/Her

Why did no one check this and change the word address to refer. It just makes no sense otherwise

This is from a .gov website

I think that when they can't (or at least couldn't) differentiate between biological sex and gender - two completely different but linked concepts, one being biological and one sociological, now buggered up forever because somebody somewhere was offended by hearing the word Sex - having the confidence to just have Title and Pronoun dropdowns instead of trying to find a way to say

'When you make a Subject Access Request for emails, we talk about you in front of you as though you're not there or you're eavesdropping, what is the least likely term to cause offence?'

in a way that fits the space on the form is highly unlikely.

Their

But in those cases you are referring to someone not addressing them

When do you address someone as they/ him / her

Precisely!!
It is so blatantly obvious what the issue is, that asking multiple questions querying it is just deliberately obtuse. A completely disingenuous line of enquiry!

'I borrowed their dog' suggests you borrowed the dog from more than one person.
'I burrowed their pencil' would suggest the pencil belonged to more than one person.
'Their' is a possessive pronoun meaning 'belonging to them'. It refers to third person plural, or did many years ago!

This is about a government website giving you a choice about how you want to be addressed and the choices are He or Him She or Her or They or Them

And that doesn’t make an iota of sense.

If the government cannot write their forms using the correct words What else are they not getting right

Court cases can be won or lost on the meaning of words

They can’t expect people to know what they mean if they also don’t know what they are asking

this just isn't correct, "they" or "their" has been used for a very long time to refer to a single person of either unknown or irrelevant gender
e.g. "im talking to a specialist tomorrow" "ok, hope they can help you" etc

https://www.oed.com/discover/a-brief-history-of-singular-they?tl=true

Indeed, that's exactly how it's used. But you're forgetting that it's used when you don't know the sex of the person involved. When you do, you use the correct pronouns.

Would person work?

hello person
is person coming to the pub
excuse me person, did your know your penis is hanging below your mini skirt

Is your point that

(a) the term ‘address’ has been used on a government website when the term ‘refer to’ would be more accurate grammatically, and that’s funny because it’s a huge institution making a grammatical error

or

(b) letting people declare pronouns, especially ‘they/them’ is woke nonsense and it’s funny because everyone’s just male or female innit

I think you’re making point (a), which is a bit pedantic but ultimately you’re right - you address with a name when you’re talking or writing to someone directly, then subsequently the only appropriate pronoun in that situation is ‘you’, which is of course non-gendered. If speaking or writing in the third person you start with a name, and subsequently refer to the person you’ve named with a pronoun. This is where ‘he’, ‘she’ and ‘they’ come in. Silly government website.

It does seem though that a lot of posters think you’re making point (b). Could you clarify?

Nobody's arguing about that. What hasn't been used in English until very recently is this:
I'm talking tomorrow to Alex in IT who helped me with this before.
Is that the one who brings his dog in with him?
Alex uses they/them pronouns. Yes, they bring their dog in with them.

In a case where you are talking about someone you know, it's normal and natural to use the pronouns for that person's sex.

Did you skip the grammar bit of English at school?

Wouldn't have any impact on your life to refer to them by their preferred pronouns would it, if your colleague did it in purpose then they're a bit of a dick and if you find 'joy' in this then you're a bit of a dick too.

So we have been using they and their for years

"It is their pencil" "they went to the shop"

So for the people that do use preferred pronouns how does it work in reality different to how it worked 10 years ago as in before this became a thing

So can anyone write a scenario in the exact words we are to use that is different to the past?

someone did argue this - that's why i provided the link, lol

I also think we need to accept that language evolves, this is how "they" is used very commonly now. That means its part of lexicon and grammar already.

Well they're pronouns so obviously you wouldn't use them to directly address anyone.

YANBU. i think this all the time when i see “my pronouns are”. I was raised to believe it’s rude to say he/she/they in front of people. As my mother would say “Who’s ‘she’ the cat’s mother?”

Preferred pronouns are cringe and stupid. Its had its day. Let's move on.

OP's right, though.
You may address me as:
Garlic
Ms Worth
Madam/Ma'am
You.

If you were being very formal & somewhat obsequious,
The lady.

If I were an aristocrat, you could use:
Your Ladyship
Your Highness
Your Majesty
or my title if appropriate, eg Duchess.

Plenty of options, even for a commoner! It'd be ridiculous to address me as she, he or they. Nobody does that.

It's rude to use a third-person pronoun in front of the person you're talking about.
"Pint of lager for you, and what does she want?"
"She (who is standing right here) wants a spritzer."
You'd immediately say "She can speak for herself, thanks", and you'd rightly be offended.

how incredibly obtuse this question is

It would be their, in that case. Non-gender specific. I only tend to use that if it's more than one person though.

Their/they is commonly used for singular people when you don’t know if male or female such as “Someone has left their coat. Can you drop it into lost property” or “We need to find a candidate to fill role x. They should have advanced excel skills and be familiar with Sage software”

It's really about control and pushing a particular ideology that claims we are men,women,other according to an internal feeling rather than our biological reality
Get it wrong at your peril. You might find yourself in court facing a male doctor who claims to be female

Singular they has been common in the English Language since Chaucer. It’s not a new thing.

No, but yet again proper usage is generally for people of unknown sex.