Wine every night

[leopardprintanduggs]

I'm currently on maternity leave and have got myself into a routine of a glass or two of wine a night. I know this isn't ideal health wise but I feel like I need something to 'look forward to' in the evening and separate the night from the day. Anyone else in the same boat? I'm not a big eater so this is my treat. I've not bought a bottle of wine today as a concerted effort to have a night off and already feeling like there's nothing much to look forward tonight!

Oggs cakes are dairy, soya, and egg free!
For cake recipes I recommend those that use the "buttermilk" method. These mix lemon juice with alternative milk and have more bicarb/baking powder than normal and oil in place of butter. My daughter has a lot of allergies including dairy, egg and soya and I've never had a fail with these recipes. I have the allergy free baby and toddler recipe book which is brilliant!

Enjoy your wine too its hard finding small pleasures on the allergy free diet!

Thats an extreme example

It perplexes me why a mum who has to go to such lengths to avoid dietary contaminants is then happy to be passing on alcohol to her baby on a daily basis.

As op explained, the timings mean her breast milk will be unaffected

As I explained people are rarely accurate in their perception of home measures. Having even 2 x 125ml glasses a night would put the mum out of action for up to 6 hrs,,,,depends on how often the baby is feeding doesn’t it? Again, it’s the daily drinking with no breaks that’s the problem ,not whether someone drinks sometimes.

You sound emotionally dependent on it already and using it as a crutch.
That will turn into a coping mechanism

Also are you in charge of a baby after 2 glass of wine? Thats half a bottle. Thats a safeguarding issue

Of course it isn't.

This is not true.
Im a child protection social worker. Please stop minimising what you are doing

I'm doing an extended dry January, but my evenings are so boring and my weekends nothing to look forward to. I can't imagine things not going back exactly the same once this is over because I have nothing to replace it with.

Would you be happy for nursery staff to look after your baby after two glasses of wine? That’s the test.

I'm not outraged at the idea of a mum having a glass or two of wine once their baby is in bed but I think every night is way too much.

Other treat things...

Make a mocktail in a nice glass with ice.
Alcohol free wine or a glass of nosecco.
Hot chocolate or nice herbal tea
Mini bar of chocolate
Little bowls of nuts & olives to snack on
Book or magazine
Paint your nails
Adult colouring book
Crafts
Face mask

Jim of course it is , half a bottle of wine ( 2 glasses) is classed as Moderate drinking and impairs the body senses and cognitive function which when looking at a small baby's needs and vulnerabilities, the OP's quality of care will be affected. Sleep will be affected and the culmerative effect of doing this every day will have an impact on the body/ brain/ thus care and provided.

She may not be intoxicated but her judgement and senses will be impacted. The fact she is prioritising this every day and putting this need above providing good care to her baby is a safeguarding issue.

I wouldn't be happy if nursery staff were doing their ironing or cooking a meal whilst looking after my baby...but I did those things whilst looking after my dc. So I'm not sure that comparison works

It’s a different scenario to getting on with other jobs because it directly speaks to competence, alertness, ability to reach quickly. Alcohol compromises our mental state in a way ironing doesn’t.

Comedycook

Alcohol is a depressant drug which means it slows down the messages between your
Body and your brain. There are laws around operating machinery/ Driving and alcohol consumption because of the risks.

It really cannot be compared to ironing.

Alcohol really is devil's milk on mumsnet

Hardly!

I let my dc watch telly and eat the odd donut for breakfast on holiday - neither of which would be acceptable in a nursery. What an odd perspective!

Have you considered the fact that baby is (1) in bed asleep and (2) the baby's dad is there too?

It is not a safeguarding issue.

@JimHalpertsWife from the op “I'm currently EBF so am attached to baby at all times”

Jilhap

Where is the mention of babys dad being there? How do we know he isn't drinking too?

Baby being asleep or awake is no difference
On being under the influence whilst in care
Of a vulnerable baby.

I would have a glass or two every night until one afternoon about 3 years ago when I realised we didn't have any wine in and I felt sheer panic. At that point I thought enough. I had about 2 weeks feeling awful, miserable, heart racing and since then I've not touched wine.

It had way too much control over me, plus if I had more than a couple of glasses it made me sick as a dog.

I would say I drank more frequently on maternity leave (enjoying it after nine months off, no distinguishing between week and weekend) but I would say that I always had a couple of nights off a week at least which made it easier to go back to only drinking at the weekends when I returned to work. I would just consider 1) how much you’re actually drinking over a week and 2) how hard it will be to break the daily habit when you’re back at work

Lots of really useful contributions, too many to respond to individually. Some very helpful and some which have made me think and reflect, so thank you.

Of course some, @tearsandtiaras, spectacularly melodramatic. A glass of wine (sometimes two) over 4 hours in the evening, while my sober husband and I watch tv in the evening, is a 'safeguarding issue' - I can't take anything else you say seriously based off that. You'd think we were both taking shots of vodka and smoking inside next to the baby - but a glass of wine 😂 good grief. In your perfect utopia, I'm sure all parents, especially mothers, would be handmaid tale-esque beings sacrificing every ounce of themselves to their offspring. The real world is more nuanced than that.

Incidentally, the judgement that seeps from you as a social worker is disgusting and you should think about how that comes across in real life to your service users.

Also, I think my title was hyperbole - I generally don't drink Monday and Tuesday (usually don't fancy it) so I am already having two days off. The feeling of drinking too much is when I compare myself to 3/4 years ago, I would only drink when going out partying and binge drinking on Saturday nights. For some reason, I consider that more 'normal' and wasn't concerned them, but little and often seems worse. In Europe though, this is considered a healthy relationship with alcohol. A reflection of the unhealthy English attitude to alcohol?