Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I feel upset about colleagues behaviour after following them on insta?

85 replies

ThatLilacHedgehog · 07/02/2025 00:48

I followed my male colleague on instagram because I have been following a lot of my colleagues recently however he never followed me back, yet he posted stories. As well as this he was off with me in work today.

should I block him, unfollow him or what? I need advice

am i being unreasonable for being upset about this?

OP posts:
Queenofheart · 07/02/2025 06:15

I recently put a post on fbk market place asking for a valetor, a guy replied, I thanked him but didn’t choose him.

Then he’s friends requested me, odd, I looked at his profile and recognised him slightly but didn’t know where from. Next day I saw him at the pool, I swim every morning, I find that creepy, no need, now I cringe every time I see him 😡

Rachmorr57 · 07/02/2025 06:18

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

IhadaStripeyDeckchair · 07/02/2025 06:29

Work is work
Private life is everything outside work
Keep the two totally separate
Work colleagues are never friends
Social media and work should be kept apart

JustMyView13 · 07/02/2025 06:29

Stop having work colleagues on your social media. They’re your colleagues, not your friends.

Fuzziduck · 07/02/2025 06:34

Just unfollow him.
He probably thinks it's weird that you follow him, when he's not a friend.

I wouldn't be adding work colleagues. Established work friends, maybe.

XxSideshowAuntSallyx · 07/02/2025 06:47

I don't follow work colleagues, not even ones I'm actual friends with. When one of us leaves I'll add them but my social media is my non work life and that's the way it will stay.

IButtleSir · 07/02/2025 06:49

ThatLilacHedgehog · 07/02/2025 00:51

Have I embarrassed myself?

Show quote history

On this thread, yes. In real life... probably. It depends if you're work friends or just colleagues. If just colleagues, then yes, you have embarrassed yourself by adding him on social media. You can avoid further embarrassment by doing absolutely nothing.

Catza · 07/02/2025 07:01

Do you enjoy the content he posts? Because that is the only reason to follow someone on IG. If you don't enjoy it, then umfollow. If you do, then don't. I don't follow most people who follow me. Especially if there is nothing valuable in their feed. I don't need pictures of people's breakfasts and fresh pedicures on my feed.

Idontjetwashthefucker · 07/02/2025 07:10

InWalksBarberalla · 07/02/2025 03:05

Is this real? Like really a thing that people old enough to have a job think about? It's mind blowing.

Pathetic isn't it

WomanFromTheNorth · 07/02/2025 07:31

It sounds like you have bad anxiety and you are massively overthinking this. I wouldn't give it a second thought. He won't be. Honestly, it's fine. Just leave it as it is. Do nothing and forget about it. Ignore the very unkind PPs who don't understand anxiety.

WomanFromTheNorth · 07/02/2025 07:33

IButtleSir · 07/02/2025 06:49

On this thread, yes. In real life... probably. It depends if you're work friends or just colleagues. If just colleagues, then yes, you have embarrassed yourself by adding him on social media. You can avoid further embarrassment by doing absolutely nothing.

Show quote history

Don't be ridiculous. Lots of people add people on SM. Especially young people - even if they hardly know each other. She has not embarrassed herself at all. Honestly, OP, he won't have given it a second thought.

Ablondiebutagoody · 07/02/2025 07:34

Why are you stalking your colleagues? It's really weird

MyDeftDuck · 07/02/2025 07:37

"Should I feel upset about colleagues behaviour after following them on insta? "

No, certainly not! What you should do is come off all your social media group chats to whatever it is they're called and concentrate your energy on doing your job - the job you are presumably paid to do - and stop worrying, thinking, or stressing over others.
They are WORK COLLEAGUES not your friends.

WomanFromTheNorth · 07/02/2025 07:38

What a spiteful answer. Have some bloody compassion. She's not stalking colleagues. Lots of people follow anyone they vaguely know on socials. I dont because im very old but OP is provably younger - and an anxious person.

Jeez, the replies on here are fucking bonkers - ignore them OP.

Onlyvisiting · 07/02/2025 07:39

Dear God, get a grip!
Some people follow/friend everyone they've ever met on social media, some stick to people they are actually friends with. He is under no obligation to 'follow you back' and I strongly doubt he has given it the slightest thought. Unless you went through his profile and liked/commented on a bunch of his posts? (Or whatever the insta equivalent is, I don't use it). .

WomanFromTheNorth · 07/02/2025 07:40

InWalksBarberalla · 07/02/2025 03:05

Is this real? Like really a thing that people old enough to have a job think about? It's mind blowing.

You clearly have no understanding of how anxiety works. You're being very insensitive and unkind.

RitaFromTheRanch · 07/02/2025 07:40

I know what you need to do, you need to do a post saying you're sick of fake people and tag him.

Newfoundzestforlife · 07/02/2025 07:41

Idontjetwashthefucker · 07/02/2025 07:10

Pathetic isn't it

Show quote history

Drop your pitchfork...

StMarie4me · 07/02/2025 07:43

Many people follow colleagues on SM. It's a MN oneupmanship to say you don't somehow.

However, OP, SM is NOT something to get upset about. Unless you're 12. So just forget it. Or get off SM if it affects you this much.

Hdjdb42 · 07/02/2025 07:44

I hate being added by people I don't know well.

OOOtil2025 · 07/02/2025 07:45

You’re work colleagues - definitely BU.

Are you very young? I can’t imagine an adult would find this offensive at all. If you are an adult then you might find CBT therapy to increase your mental resilience might be beneficial in day to day life. Otherwise I fear you’ll really struggle when other more common challenges arise.

Hereagaintoday · 07/02/2025 07:46

Is it that you fancy him? Was this a bid to start to find out if he fancies you, and you are a bit embarrassed as he doesn’t appear to?

If so, pick yourself up and think not of it. We’ve all been there!

PhyllisWallet · 07/02/2025 07:48

Are you six?

CheshireDing · 07/02/2025 07:52

I don't think this is real. Why would a person care if a work colleague followed them on Instagram etc? Sounds like an absolute waste of time and thought.

Just do your own thing OP and stop following/worrying what some random is doing virtually.

TemporaryPosition · 07/02/2025 07:55

IhadaStripeyDeckchair · 07/02/2025 06:29

Work is work
Private life is everything outside work
Keep the two totally separate
Work colleagues are never friends
Social media and work should be kept apart

It's not that simple, not all workplaces are like this. It would be better if they were. Lines get blurred when others are constantly crossing them