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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is escorting worth it?

301 replies

LastHope30Something · 01/02/2025 20:23

Sounds extreme but considering this if I can’t get a job in a month or so because I’m so fed up of having to watch everything and feel like I get punished for treating myself. Sounds childish I know but my headspace seriously needs a boost. Obviously this won’t be my first choice but if things don’t change then choice is out of the question. Obviously I wouldn’t do the extras just dinner dates and girlfriend experience etc

here’s why I’m considering it
*extra money for me and my family.
*can treat myself more to boost my mood.
*can afford the work I need done.
*help me get over this past few years.
*get to relive my youth by going to fancy bars and restaurants also save up for travel.
*if things go shit with my family and in laws the money can go towards daycare or if me and hubby need a break.
*pontentially more opportunities in life.
*feel more wanted and useful. Also it will get rid of my low self worth.

OP posts:
Doris86 · 01/02/2025 21:25

LastHope30Something · 01/02/2025 20:25

I won’t be having sex with strangers. Just dates

Not how it works I’m afraid. Escorting is just another name for prostitution. Escorts try to keep it sounding legal and above board by saying that clients are just paying for their time to go with them to dinner etc. In reality 99.99% of clients will be expecting sex.

IcedPurple · 01/02/2025 21:26

I agree with others. If 'escorting' was just about making boring small talk with lonely businessmen over a nice free dinner, then it might be a pretty good deal.

But of course that's not what it's about. Sex will definitely be expected.

Wonderi · 01/02/2025 21:26

Who?
People you know personally?

Do you think men are going to pay a woman just to go to dinner with them?

The only reason men do this is for the chance of sex.
If they know there’s no sex then they’ll just find someone else.

Are you exceptionally beautiful?
Why do you think they would go for you to have dinner with them, when they could go with someone else and have sex.

Do you not care that you’re married but you’ll be flirting and acting you’re in a relationship with someone else?

Why would you want any man touching you, even if it’s not sexual.

If you feel unfulfilled in your current job, then get another one.

LBFseBrom · 01/02/2025 21:26

ShortWide · 01/02/2025 20:25

Obviously I wouldn’t do the extras just dinner dates and girlfriend experience etc

…ain’t no such thing.

I agree.

OP, just be very careful.

LeticiaMorales · 01/02/2025 21:26

wildthingsinthenight · 01/02/2025 21:25

Goodness you are BREATHTAKINGLY naive OP

Edited

I think that this person needs quite a bit of help and support as well.

Comedycook · 01/02/2025 21:27

Honestly op, theres not lots of charming, nice men out there desperate to pay you to go to dinner with them.

How naive can you be?

BMW6 · 01/02/2025 21:28

Hang on a mo, is the OP the one with a baby boy who posted thread after thread about her hair, "wavy" body, how she'd put her child into Care if he interferred with her Beauty Regime?

Different name but very similar posting style.

Jabbabong · 01/02/2025 21:28

Men don't like talking at the best of times. Why the fuck would they want to pay for it?

ThatMerryReader · 01/02/2025 21:28

Lilliea · 01/02/2025 21:14

Bit unnecessary

I would love to find out the reason why my post was deleted by the admins.
The only thing I said is that escort and prostitute are the same thing. I struggle to understand why would someone disagree. You are entitled to do so but perhaps you could express your opinion rather than reporting the post ???

Gemkls · 01/02/2025 21:28

Research Findom. Think this would be a better option

Cattreesea · 01/02/2025 21:29

OP don't be naive. Men are not going to pay you just to go on dates...

Don't get involved in sex work, too many safety concerns and your self-esteem and mental health will take a hit.

devastatedagain · 01/02/2025 21:30

LastHope30Something · 01/02/2025 20:25

I won’t be having sex with strangers. Just dates

There's no such thing love. The punters will be expecting full sex.

LeticiaMorales · 01/02/2025 21:30

BMW6 · 01/02/2025 21:28

Hang on a mo, is the OP the one with a baby boy who posted thread after thread about her hair, "wavy" body, how she'd put her child into Care if he interferred with her Beauty Regime?

Different name but very similar posting style.

There's a few threads under this name, too - quite concerning.

Banyon · 01/02/2025 21:30

You might get “lucky” and meet guy like our friend John, a 40 yr old virgin type. He used escort but was too shy to actually ask for the sex he was paying for and ended up thinking they were in a relationship. He gave her money all the time just because she asked (sick mother, new eye glasses, car repairs ..). BTW she was in UK illegally … was also trying for marriage but it got too complicated (we thought because she was probably already married to a dude from home country).

He always insisted to us that she was a companion escort, not sex…. Hahahaha

The girlfriend experience, by the way, includes sex. The role-play is that she is your GF, you go out to a date, and then have sex.

ElizabethTaylorsEyebrow · 01/02/2025 21:31

Does OP sometimes post under the name Brooklynne?

If so you’re a sweet person who I think is just looking for fulfilment in all the wrong places. Neither escorting, nor youtube, nor plastic surgery are the solution. If your marriage is unsatisfying think about why and focus on that. If your job is the problem focus on that. These are all distinct issues that need to be solved in distinct ways, not by looking for some silver bullet that comes from outside your situation.

Oh, and you are not old! Far far far from it. Your older self will look back on the age you are now and see that.

bifurCAT · 01/02/2025 21:31

So wait... Pay a woman to go out with you and then also pay for the food and entertainment, and not get sex?

Isn't that just normal dating, but more expensive?

chipndip · 01/02/2025 21:31

OP, you sound very very naive.

Go sit in a public place and look at every single man. Could you honestly have sex with and/or give head to each and every one?

At the very least, go read SAAFE which is a forum for sex workers. They have a few articles too about things to consider before going into escorting. For the most part, it is not glamorous, nor is it easy money. It is also an over-saturated marketplace full of women willing to do anything.

Girlfriend experience (GFE) means different things to different people. It's also a service many have moved on from. Ultimately, men are paying for sex and paying for you to leave. Yes, some do want to talk as well, but they're few and far between. Most just want a sexual tick list of services performed, often for as little amount of money as possible. These men often believe that if they're paying for an hour of your time, that's an hour of solid fucking.

I did high class escorting (or companionship, a term most as most £400+ ph companions tend to use). I did only do dinner dates and longer dates. But, sex was still always on the menu. I also did it alongside an actual job as men looking for dinner dates are few and far between. It also takes time to build a client list, as does screening, marketing, dealing with enquiries etc. You also have to be very clear about your boundaries too. It's a lot of work to even get yourself out on a paid for date.

Lastly and most importantly, escorting really isn't a way to boost your self-esteem or self worth. Only you can do that.

Nameychangington · 01/02/2025 21:31

BMW6 · 01/02/2025 21:28

Hang on a mo, is the OP the one with a baby boy who posted thread after thread about her hair, "wavy" body, how she'd put her child into Care if he interferred with her Beauty Regime?

Different name but very similar posting style.

That's her, but it was if having her son interfered with her making YouTube videos.

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 01/02/2025 21:31

LastHope30Something · 01/02/2025 20:28

I’ve heard of escorts just doing dates and nothing else

Yeah, that's not really a thing

LittleBigHead · 01/02/2025 21:32

Well, if you’re OK with prostitution….

How would you feel if your husband, father, brother, or son bought a woman’s body?

NoGwenItsABoxingDayTrifle · 01/02/2025 21:33

I'd say 99% of escorts are expected to have sex. I do have a friend who is a lap dancer, no sex involved and she makes good money.

Lilliea · 01/02/2025 21:33

ThatMerryReader · 01/02/2025 21:28

I would love to find out the reason why my post was deleted by the admins.
The only thing I said is that escort and prostitute are the same thing. I struggle to understand why would someone disagree. You are entitled to do so but perhaps you could express your opinion rather than reporting the post ???

Edited

You've left off your first sentence but ok.

Parrotinthehouse · 01/02/2025 21:33

LastHope30Something · 01/02/2025 20:28

I’ve heard of escorts just doing dates and nothing else

Youv'e heard wrong...sorry.

Its dinner and sex

TwigletsAndRadishes · 01/02/2025 21:36

Obviously I wouldn’t do the extras just dinner dates and girlfriend experience etc

😂

You are living in cloud cuckoo land if you think you will earn worthwhile money without needing to drop your knickers.

tapestrap · 01/02/2025 21:37

In my opinion its not worth it at all. I've known two women who worked as prostitutes and they were both murdered by clients. If you have any choice please don't do it and even if you have no choice still don't do it.