How are people managing to pay the bills in this shit show

[Allthenameshavegone1972]

My daughter, fiance & dgs moved into their small, rented house nearly 3 years ago. Finding it a big struggle every month with the rent being £860. We, & her in-laws are guarantors for their rent.
I've found out her fiance has asked to borrow money for rent from his mum & for the second time my daughter has asked to borrow as he has not had the overtime. They obviously can't afford it. Both trying to get pay rises but it's hard in this day & age.
At the grand old age of 60 I was hoping to take a break from my office job, which I hate, for a few months and then go temping or work part time. We can afford for me to do that. If, on the other hand, I'm working full time then we can afford to be guarantors for their rent. Cant win either way!
She wishes theyd never rented now. They were living with her inlaws who have the space for them. She wishes she'd saved that rental money for a deposit instead. Their only option is to go back living with them, or all us parents carry-on working til we drop to pay for their rent. At 60 years old we should not have the pressure of working til we drop to pay for our adult dc's rent. We're not going to be in the best of health to work forever as we get older.
My dd is despairing, saying that she can't see life getting any better. I agree, unless us parents die relatively young without needing a care home and they inherit from us.
This shit show of a housing & col crisis is at breaking point, something had to be done, but I don't know what! 😡😡

Then you're very lucky to earn minimum wage and have such a cheap rent maybe an argument for minimum wages to be set according to what it actually costs to live in an area.

We can but hope they dont. Still, neither Labour nor the Conservatives appear to have the answers to the shit show 3rd world country we now live in.

I haven't checked but I think they may still be entitled to so universal credit, there are calculators here that can help her figure it out. Having her rent jump up by £200 a month will have thrown their budget out, but with some very careful tweaks, writing everything down, and being frugal until their car loans are paid off, they should be ok. (I have 2 children and a minimum wage job, a council house with rent of £630 a month, and we manage, just)

Check here

www.gov.uk/benefits-calculators

3700 income
Minus
860 rent
500 food
200 Council tax
200 petrol
250 electric, gas, water, TV licence
50 insurance
100 clothes for child....
That's 2000 easily before unexpected costs and car costs/repayments, coffees, the odd day out.
One costly repair or vet trip and the rest has gone!

That said 860 isn't a bad rent, obviously depending on where they live.
They are young, on minimum wage with a young child, life should improve. Perhaps they could look into whether training for a more lucrative career would be possible? In the meantime, they need to scrutinise where their money is going and see where perhaps they could cut costs, rather than relying on parents to bail them out.

Sooo they probably bring home around 3K a month, between them...maybe more? They would get £300 UC for their child, £700 maximum rent (it's capped at 700 on privately rented, but Housing Association would mean having the entirety of their rent paid.) - UC is deducted at 55p to the pound, so they should be getting around £500 UC...maybe more? Or maybe less if they are earning more and even then their wages would make up the UC shortfall.

Council Tax is around £200?

Gas&Electric around £300? Or less?

Water £50 or 60?

Once rent and bills are paid - £2,160 left.

Sky and broadband package - £100 (Not sure how much that is anymore because I cancelled Sky a long time ago and only pay £36 for the fastest fibre Internet I cam get in my area)

Phones - £150 together - Depending on what addons they have, model etc

Cars Insurance - £90

Petrol/diesel - £160 a month (Too much?)

Food shop for 3 - £350 a month ?

Childminding - 80% is paid by UC. I don't know how old the child is, but maybe that leaves anywhere between 100 and 200 left to pay?

Trips out and luxuries - ??

That leaves around - 1300 to play with.

Have the applied for UC?

Do you know how much their income is? The rent is not high considering what people pay now. Can I assume the rent is normal for the area and workers are on fairly low pay, and employment opportunities not easy to find?

If, on the other hand they are in an area with good prospects and just happen to have a lower than average monthly rent, it would be a different matter.

Whatever it is, if you are being asked for loans and as guarantor for their rent etc. You MUST know what their income and expenditure is. If they do not want to tell you, you must find out if you can stop being guarantor and stop lending them money. They may say they are low paid, but unless they actually prove it, they could be gambling or using their income for something else knowing you will guarantee it all.

Where I live we are starting to see improvements already in public services. Labour have achieved loads since last July, but unlike the previous lot, they are quietly getting on with the job and not expecting a pat on the back every time. Maybe keep up with them rather than slag them off when you don’t actually know what they’ve done?
I’m mortified that this third runway looks likely to go ahead, plus other airport expansions. I’m hoping Ed Miliband can put a stop to it. Also nearly 20k immigrants who failed the process have already been deported.
They are also going after all the VIP Covid contracts to get our money back, including Michelle Mone. Planning reform, Jess Phillips is working hard on trying to keep us safer. Opening the door to the EU. The list is really endless. Maybe do some digging.

Herein lays the issue - They don't claim UC. They are missing out on £300 a month UC plus a bit more for rent! Get them to make a joint claim.

Ok. To answer those asking about cars: I've never said they had brand new cars, neither of them do. Due to poor public transport they both need reliable cars to get to their JOBS. My dd also uses her car occasionally for work & obviously has to claim on her expenses. She does have business I insurance for her car, somebody is bound to ask. They have very reliable cars, which with regular servicing/maintenance should last them a good while until they run them into the ground. One is due to finish this year & one next year. I don't know where you got the idea they had BRAND NEW cars.
Thank you good people for your comments, which have been taken on board. This thread has been done to death now 🙂

Talking of IHT I discovered that the Treasury gives you 6 months to find the money. After that, they calculate it and start charging interest on it.

There are also strict rules on how much you can give in cash handouts and gifts.

Sounds a bit like my sister and BIL, always pleading poverty with 2 full-time jobs, free Granny childcare, Grandparents doing all the taxi-ing etc. Constantly on the mooch for money. Kids not dressed in winter coats so Granny bought them etc. Eventually got caught out when it was discovered both Grannies were 100% covering Uni Rent for one GD.

What sister really meant was she doesn't have enough money to cover the bills, have a new car and do all the fun stuff.

Is your daughter maybe covering the bills fine but not enough left to keep up with the Jones'?

Is this trolling??
Things are this way cos of the government we just got rid of. Might wanna give the new one more than 6 months to turn things around?

OP, if they're not paying childcare, they should be able to manage on minimum wage with that rent, not extravagantly with how much everything costs these days, but without borrowing at least.
Have they fallen into the trap of car loans, large phone contracts and too many subscriptions? It's too easy to do in the modern world, but they arent necessities and if they cant afford it they need to make cuts unfortunately

They are not yet married. Perhaps one or both is putting more aside than they say if their relationship is going sour.

It's a bit confusing because adults renting wouldn't normally need a guarantor (I worked in property). Only people who don't meet the income criteria (eg students) would be required to have one, so if they both work full time they should certainly meet the criteria for £800 a month, unless one of them earns cash in hand or something like that? Therefore your concern might be occasionally having to help them out with rent but you certainly shouldn't have to worry about being a guarantor for life - that's something you need to discuss with your family, maybe they're not being 100% transparent.

...and if the giver of the deposit doesn't live for 7 years, IHT is payable on that part of the mortgage.

@Ladyingreen999 many landlords & letting agencies do ask for one these days; especially for first time renters with no references, low earners.

Very unfair comment and totally inappropriate to compare OP's situation to your son and his partner. I know several people who were in a precarious financial situation when they became parents and things eventually improved.
OP, I have a family member who is really struggling too, despite careful budgeting and overtime etc.

It wasn't so much Truss as the way the BOE reacted to it, and people followed their reaction. The finance houses would not have recovered from the Libor problem if her budget was accepted.

What we are experiencing over the years since covid is them recovering as much of their losses when interest rates were low.

Yes, correct. Gifts given less than 7 years before you die may be taxed depending on:

who you give the gift to and their relationship to you
the value of the gift
when the gift was given

For more info
https://www.gov.uk/inheritance-tax/gifts

I believe that this 7 year rule is set to increase.

They do. But they still require paying for, they aren't free. And often, people take car loans to purchase one, especially if they've had to unexpectedly replace one.

And did OP state they were brand new? Most of the time, when people say "got a new car", they mean new to them. Mines a 57 plate, ancient by today's standards, but when I got it 5 years ago I said "I've got a new car" when telling people about it. It wasn't brand new then and it certainly isn't now.

Do they have credit cards? Are they just making the minimum payment? Perhaps they do not consider that to be a debt as it is not called in, but payable monthly? Do they know how much interest they are paying?

I remember a friend sitting at her desk, having just found out the results of a stand with a tourist overseas, looked up to see how much credit she had and said ''I can afford to go to Spain on holiday - and went.

Show them how they can pay off the balance of the card each month and not have to pay interest at all?

£1000's a month in disposable income, after all costs & bills. It is insulting you think such a high level of disposable income is a hardship. They should be well on their way for a house deposit. Put another way, to have net £3700 a month as a single earner household - would be £62k a year. Doesn't sound a small amount.

This may not apply to them but many young people expect to have a certain standard of living that is much higher than we expected - meals out, lots of friends, holidays abroad etc. Times in the past were hard for many of us bringing up a family etc but I do understand that the cost of mortgages & rents have gone up a lot in the past few years.

Look after yourself.
You don't have to save them, in this situation, and it's probably not helping them.

Crikey I wish we had that much disposable income a month!

Someone needs to sit down with them and sort out their budget, even though they are adults, as they’ve obviously lost their way.

At least you can help before you end up having to finance them.