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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why there isn’t public outrage about this?

873 replies

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:23

If a couple isn’t married but own their property between them, the surviving one will need to pay inheritance tax on their partners half of the house (and other assets) if they die.
Effectively they will lose their home to pay the IHT unless they also have huge savings.
How can that be allowed in this day and age when so many couples cohabit without getting married?

OP posts:
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12
Original poster
Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:55

thehorsesareallidiots · 30/01/2025 12:54

Why should you get the legal benefits of marriage if you won't sign up to the legal responsibilities?

It's a free choice. Marriage or civil partnership is available to everyone. You either take it all or none. In or out.

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I didn’t realise heterosexual couples could choose a civil partnership.

OP posts:
MostHighlyFlavoredGravy · 30/01/2025 12:55

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:52

Crickey, I didn’t think of that either. My family are really toxic so don’t want them having any control over me or my wellbeing. How does one specify who they want their next of kin to be?

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Get wills and lasting powers of attorney put in place. You said upthread you're financially savvy - you sure about that?!

TheDowagerCountessofPembroke · 30/01/2025 12:55

So some random moves in with a new partner and two days later the home owner drops down dead. The new partner of 2 days should get the house and not the homeowners children?

How long should someone be in a relationship for before that can inherit? How do they prove it?

WinterBones · 30/01/2025 12:56

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:55

I didn’t realise heterosexual couples could choose a civil partnership.

Show quote history

it was bought in for het couple a couple of years (or so) ago so that they could have the same ability to protect each others rights as a couple legally without getting 'married'

MostHighlyFlavoredGravy · 30/01/2025 12:56

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:55

I didn’t realise heterosexual couples could choose a civil partnership.

Show quote history

Since 2019.

MrsSkylerWhite · 30/01/2025 12:56

What’s to be outraged about?

If you want the financial security that marriage provides, get married. Doesn’t need to be made public 🤷‍♀️

thehorsesareallidiots · 30/01/2025 12:57

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:55

I didn’t realise heterosexual couples could choose a civil partnership.

Show quote history

Have you done any research into this? Or did you only just discover that marriage is a thing five minutes ago and are now stomping your foot about how it's not faaaaaaaaair?

Ilovemyshed · 30/01/2025 12:57

Hold the house as tenants in common
Or get married
Or enter a civil partnership

Original poster
Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:57

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 30/01/2025 12:52

You must be very wealthy if you are expecting that inheritance tax will be due on your estate. The position in the UK at the moment is something like this (I am not professionally qualified here):
First £325k of the estate is always tax-free
Everything you leave to your spouse or civil partner is tax-free
If a single person leaves their house to their children or grandchildren, another £175k tax-free allowance can potentially be added.
If a married person dies and leaves everything to their spouse, so their £325k + £175k is not used, on the death of the spouse their estate gets not just their own £325k + £175k but the unused allowances from the other spouse, so £1m in total.

So a married couple leaving a house and some savings to their children in most parts of the UK will be able to pass the whole lot with no question of tax.

I personally think marriage and civil partnerships are more relevant when relationships break down. An unmarried partner has no claim on the other partner's assets. People need to think long and hard about entering into a relationship where their finances become intertwined. Not getting married should be a positive choice taken with full information, not just something that happens because you haven't got the money together for a wedding or the right moment hasn't come along for a big proposal scene or your partner constantly fobs you off when you raise the subject or you mistakenly believe it's just a piece of paper.

Definitely don’t consider ourselves to be very wealthy.

OP posts:
Shrekjrre · 30/01/2025 12:57

What I don't understand is why people who chose to have children together don't get married

Ilovemyshed · 30/01/2025 12:57

Or joint tenants, cant remember which

madamweb · 30/01/2025 12:57

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:55

I didn’t realise heterosexual couples could choose a civil partnership.

Show quote history

It was hardly a big secret

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 30/01/2025 12:57

Thé holding doesn’t make any difference to IHT, only to who inherits the half of the property

From HMRC:

Joint tenants
You automatically inherit anything you owned as ‘joint tenants’.
You may have to pay Inheritance Tax if the whole of the deceased’s estate (all their money, property and possessions) is worth more than the Inheritance Tax threshold of £325,000 and the deceased’s estate does not pay.

Tenants in common
You may have to pay Inheritance Tax on the deceased’s share of the money in bank accounts, shares or property if the whole of their estate (money, property and possessions) is worth more than the Inheritance Tax threshold of £325,000.
If the deceased left you their share of the money, shares or property in their will, the executor of the will or administrator of their estate should pay the Inheritance Tax out of the estate.
If the estate does not have enough money to pay the Inheritance Tax on the deceased’s share of the assets, or the executor does not pay, you’ll have to pay it. You may have to sell the shares or property to pay the tax and any other debts.

the only exemption from IHT if applicable is by marriage or civil partnership .

How Inheritance Tax works: thresholds, rules and allowances

Inheritance Tax (IHT) is paid when a person's estate is worth more than £325,000 when they die - exemptions, passing on property. Sometimes known as death duties.

https://www.gov.uk/inheritance-tax

justteanbiscuits · 30/01/2025 12:58

Friends in their sixties, having been together 40 years, have recently had a civil partnership to avoid this happening. You don't need to be married.

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 30/01/2025 12:58

I did not know this! And I am not married and share a house with my DP that we both own... hmn... thanks for the flag!

Original poster
Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:58

MostHighlyFlavoredGravy · 30/01/2025 12:55

Get wills and lasting powers of attorney put in place. You said upthread you're financially savvy - you sure about that?!

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Maybe not but savvy enough to build up my vast fortune 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
Ophy83 · 30/01/2025 12:58

saraclara · 30/01/2025 12:32

You don't need to be married to avoid inheritance tax on your home. You just need to be joint tenants.

This isn't correct - ownership automatically falls to the remaining JT without having to go through probate, but half the value of the property is still added to the deceased's estate for the purposes of an IHT calculation

SerendipityJane · 30/01/2025 13:00

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:55

I didn’t realise heterosexual couples could choose a civil partnership.

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It's hardly a state secret.

Original poster
Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 13:00

Ophy83 · 30/01/2025 12:58

This isn't correct - ownership automatically falls to the remaining JT without having to go through probate, but half the value of the property is still added to the deceased's estate for the purposes of an IHT calculation

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That’s what I thought so there is a lot of incorrect information on this thread

OP posts:
TallulahBetty · 30/01/2025 13:00

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:46

My point is that why shouldn’t cohabiting couples get the same legal protection as marriage isn’t just a legal contract and a lot of cohabiting couples are committed to each other but don’t want to get married.

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It is, in fact, just a legal contract. If it's marriage itself that you don't like, get a CP?

Brefugee · 30/01/2025 13:00

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:25

Might be easily solvable but a lot of couples don’t want to get married.

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Tough. Tits.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 30/01/2025 13:00

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:25

Might be easily solvable but a lot of couples don’t want to get married.

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Nothing could be fairer, but then they need to appreciate there'll be downsides as well as positives atttached to their choice

justteanbiscuits · 30/01/2025 13:00

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:57

Definitely don’t consider ourselves to be very wealthy.

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Less that 5% of estates are of a level to pay IHT.

Brefugee · 30/01/2025 13:01

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:25

I’ve only just realised this myself and I am usually very financially savvy.

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How long have you been on MN? We talk about this constantly

Nanny0gg · 30/01/2025 13:01

Blusterylimp · 30/01/2025 12:25

Might be easily solvable but a lot of couples don’t want to get married.

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Well, as it's literally a contract that doesn't need to involve an expensive day and lots of people that's up to them

The law doesn't need to change as it will open up a possible huge can of worms and be quite complicated.