Bringing toddler out in the rain

[RainRainRain123]

Just started a new nanny position. Mother of the child (20 months) is quite insistent that he should be brought out twice a day even if its raining. He has rain gear, I do not. Just arrived this morning to be told he loves the library, its only a 30 minute walk each way, it's lashing rain here. I said if it eases of later I will get out with him. Questioned me yesterday if we went to the park. Has sent me numerous groups, all of which are at least 20 minutes walk away, not allowed take him out in the car. Where they live is also quite hilly and buggy isn't the best.

Mam seems to walk everywhere and always has her rain gear on. AIBU to not want to go out twice a day when the weather is bad.

Ha, not at all superior. Not sure if times have changed as I've been away from the UK for a while, but I grew up in the 90s and you just had your standard jacket as a kid.
All kids here have multiple pairs of rain trousers / dungarees/ puddle suits. Ones with fleece inside, ones without fleece, a pair of snow trousers. They're worn all the time except when it's really hot.
Adults here can wear rain trousers too, especially cyclists and hikers.

@strawberrycrumbles

No one with half a brain is going out for a 30 min walk in that.
not everyone is a snowflake. A bit of heavy rain doesn't mean all life has to stopand here you go again with your hyperbole. Your response to my description of forcefull horizontal lashing gusty rain is 'boo hoo. Not everyone is a snowflake'

🤣

Buy a coat!

Cut to the chase - are they paying you enough? Do you have a contract? Paid leave? NI contributions? Are you well paid? Because if it is 'cash-in-hand, no rights', badly paid, re-think your employment. This is the nannies' market, not the parents' market, you can choose any sort of commitment, it is up to you.

@strawberrycrumbles

I am in South London. NEVER has it rained so much here you couldn't go out for a run
Firstly
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣never see. Rain hard enough that you couldn't sensibly go for a run???? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Secondly, it's almost like you think the whole country is south London 🫤.

Sounds mainly like miscommunication about the role before you started.

The mother seems to have really clear ideas about how she wants her child to spend their time.

You are a really experienced nanny, who has clear knowledge and ideas about child development and appropriate activities that you would do.

Can you talk to the mother about using your expertise to plan and organise the days.

Otherwise I think that this may well.not be the job for you

I love this mum. I walked everywhere with DD, I picked her up from nursery by foot even if it was chucking it down. She loved going to the park in that weather as the puddles were huge. Really fond memories of the preschool years, we still walk everywhere now she's 6.

@strawberrycrumbles

Oooo look. There's @strawberrycrumbles out for their daily jog 😂

I'd suggest soft play for exercise on really cold and wet days, and a seperate special muddy puddle trip down the woods for the nature enrichment when it's not as wet/cold. I'd drive to both, taking towels and spare clothes/shoes (and maybe a flask of something warm for after!) for the latter.

Then I'd drive him to the library and the other baby groups. If they're a 30 minute walk then it's a 5 minute drive, so the fuel costs will be marginal.

I imagine he would actually get a lot more enrichment out of that than being schlepped everywhere in a buggy under a raincover.

Just started a new nanny position....
He has rain gear, I do not.

Plan B is always just Plan A with a raincoat.

Has sent me numerous groups, all of which are at least 20 minutes walk away, not allowed take him out in the car.

Why drive if it's only a 20m walk? 🤔 What a waste of petrol and not good for the environment. Lazy, some would say. In my area it would actually take longer to take the car by the time you'd found a parking space anyway 😆

I've never come across an employed Nanny who didn't seem to want to actually, well, nanny... 😆

Is this definitely the job for you @RainRainRain123 ?

yabu sorry. It's raining all the time in the UK, you can't expect the toddler to sit at home half the year. Get some wellies and a rain coat and crack on.

I agree with this. Have you given the mum any ideas about the sorts of activities you'd like to do with the child? As a parent, I'd be more open to changing my preconceived ideas if you were making alternative suggestions, e.g. "It's better weather on Tuesday so we'll meet another nanny and child in the park for a play then, but today we'll drive to the library and then do swimming afterwards to burn some energy off".

I imagine what she wants is what most parents want - for you to exhaust her child sufficiently during the day that they sleep well at night 😂. She may be open to alternative ways of achieving this.

This. Nannies earn well, so get down to your local Millets or Mountain Warehouse and see what they have.

This tells me he needs to go the park more often then, so he can learn spatial awareness and body awareness under supervision!

Twice a day could be pretty annoying with all the palaver of going in and out and drying stuff between, but yes, I take my son out every day and chose his nursery because they have a dedicated under twos outdoor space rather than taking turns.

Usually err towards the clearer part of the day, but otherwise it's wellies and wet weather gear.

I would not be happy about always walking to/from venues 30m away, on the grounds that it cuts into time spent otherwise, and is a long inactive period for a child in a pram. But 20m and under, yes.

I'd be asking for a few compromises, but I'd frame them positively. For example, taking a child to the shops/to errands is also good developmentally for a slice of life - talk about what you want to do positively when you don't want to be outside all the time.,

It isn't just getting out for fresh air. It's 2 hours of pushing a buggy as the kid isn't going to walk that far, it would take hours at a toddlers pace even if they could manage it. That would be quite exhausting in bad weather and I wouldn't be happy doing it. Especially if the buggy isn't up to the job. I don't think you're BU.

I would absolutely hate that. Getting splashed by mucky puddles by drivers in the comfort of their own cars is not my idea of fun. I would be looking for another job. But that's just me, and I'm saying that as someone who always took my kids out walking, just not in the rain unless where it couldn't be helped like the school run for example.

I have no problem going out everyday, it's what I've always done as a Nanny. In my last position I brought the oldest to school and picked her up, always walked. We would go to the park after school everyday, back home for a quick snack and then to the library. I would also bring the baby for a walk every morning after school drop of and we would attend baby group twice a week. The parents never asked me to do this and were very grateful as obviously they were working and glad that their children were being brought out. There was never any expectation for me to bring the children anywhere.

With this new position its the insistence of going out twice a day no matter what the weather. I'm more than happy to go out twice a day as in weather is good in the morning so we go the park, weather not great in the afternoon, we drive to soft play or the library. Toddler is tired or under the weather we stay in and play with toys.

It is only short time as he starts nursery in May where he most definitely will not be brought out twice a day.

She’s being a bit rigid but it’s weird that you don’t have a rain coat in your job.

If the buggy is crap I wouldn’t be happy about pushing it for 1/2 hour in heavy rain. Can you suggest you take the car to the library but walk everywhere else, as he’s not particularly benefitting from being under a plastic sheet in the buggy that long? Get some hiking trousers that dry quickly, a really good Scandinavian rain coat, and these foldy cushions are brilliant for having snacks / breaks on damp park benches and you’ll be fine. www.littleadventureshop.co.uk/products/multimat-compact-kumfie-folding-sit-mat-green?variant=45260722143454&currency=GBP&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAADpPgnxWn9s1RCTFokjbkbvm-gsc6&gclid=CjwKCAiAneK8BhAVEiwAoy2HYYXQEIRhQkhb5EGD0wvB9fNQ-Hkcxvb7UfUjNI7C7I9QH8HKGxjNGhoCMQsQAvD_BwE

I find it hard to see how you were happy to go out everyday presumably in all weathers for a twice daily school run and walk after but now your employed by someone who is asking you to do something not too dissimilar in going out twice a day you're reluctant?

Nannies melt in the rain unless they have umbrellas with talking bird handles to protect them.

Nannies melt in the rain unless they have umbrellas with talking bird handles to protect them.

The parents never asked me to do this and were very grateful as obviously they were working and glad that their children were being brought out. There was never any expectation for me to bring the children anywhere.

I find this a bit odd and I would not be 'grateful' to a nanny for taking my children out, I'm afraid. I'd see it as part of their job.

Round here, there seems to be a fairly standard 'diet' of groups and classes that children with nannies attend. Most nannies would expect to take children out 1-2 times a day. It would be fairly common for a child to attend a weekly swimming lesson, music group and playgroup. Besides these, children might also go to a gym or dance class, the park or playground, soft play or playdates with similar-aged children (often nannies who meet at groups arrange to meet up independently).

Personally I think being out twice every day is excessive although I know a lot of nannies/parents do this. Imo children should have downtime at home with their toys and to do creative activities like drawing, painting, playdoh etc. But I would certainly say that the expectation that most parents employing a nanny would have is that their child is taken out somewhere at least daily. Obviously younger siblings often have less in the way of organised activities than older ones as they have to fit in with the school run - personally, I aimed for 3-4 a week before DC2 started nursery (swimming, music, library, maybe toddler bounce if we were feeling energetic). I don't think this is an unreasonable expectation.

It is only short time as he starts nursery in May where he most definitely will not be brought out twice a day.

My daughter's nursery have the doors open so the children can come and go as they please so she's deff going out more than twice a day. In all weathers. I'd loose my mind if I stayed in all day and so would my children!

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with going out: the opposite in fact, but the insistence on walking is, especially given that we have had severe weather of late.