Holidays - grumpy husband.

[thismummydrinksgin]

So
After years of a grumpy husband on holidays I've had enough - it's too hot, I have a rash, I don't want to be in the pool all the time etc etc. We stayed in Uk, cost almost as much and just got a different suite of complaints always aimed at me - where as have booked is too remote, he hates the beach, just wants to do what he wants for one day which is walking to a pub and basically I always come back crying.

This year am I being unreasonable if I am take my 13 year old daughter abroad alone? Sick of keeping everyone happy (also 17yr old boy but that's another story).

Looking for help - thinking Turkey, Greece or Cyprus, desperate for hotels recommendations short transfer, bits to do outside of hotel and quiet pools as Daughter doesn't cope with busy? Budget £2-3kXx

Sorry for the badly written post 😂 too much go while cooking dinner 🫣

as an adult you can go on holiday with whoever you like when you like. He can stay home or arrange his own holiday.

I dunno, maybe ask him and DS what sort of holiday they’d like? I have a DH who hates beach and the pool like they are acid baths. He is also “allergic” to the sun. He prefers city breaks and museums. Especially museums with medieval pointy, sharp weapons in them.

So we tend to discuss compromises where we can both get what we want.

Do it! It’s a holiday, it’s a lot of money to spend on something you don’t enjoy. Let the boys sort themselves out.

Did exactly the same last year with 19 year old and 13 year old. Honestly the best holiday I’ve ever had. We went to Italy for a week, stayed in Milan spent 2/3 days wandering around there then got trains (so cheap in Italy!) to Lake Como and Lake Garda. We laughed so much and have the most amazing memories. Planning on going away again on our own this summer.

Do it! It will be lovely. He is an arsehole. Or maybe he just hates holidays. Stop dragging him along. Hope you have a great girls holiday.

Do it!

Enjoy your girls break

Do you always do the same sort of holiday, or do you vary it? Or take it in turns to choose where to go?

Absolutely do it, and let him know exactly why. If he complains, ask him what kind of holiday he’d like to go on, as everything you’ve tried he complains about.

Don't take a 13yo girl to turkey. Sorry to say, but she will get perved on and leered at when you're out and about.

Deffo go Greece, minus the grump.

Have you asked him what he wants to do on holiday? Does he actually get one day of go to a walk to a pub on your holiday?

It sounds as if he has given feedback - not too hot, not interested in the beach, doesn't like the pool. And yet you are planning booking a summer holiday in Turkey.

I do think he would prefer something like that but the 13 year old wouldn't and it would be down to me to plan it. I don't actually mind that but it never feels like we are doing it together - it's like I'm forcing him 😂

Good answer 😂

That sounds great - so you didn't need a car?

He does hate holidays, just hoping he doesn't feel too hard done too if he's left !

Don’t plan for them, they’re just old enough to
both use the internet!

Since Covid we have done UK breaks, I try to book near a beach for the kids and the dog but he hates the beach so last year I booked in rural wales (he loves wales) and even that didn't hit the spot as there wasn't enough to do etc etc

Yes I think the penny will drop. I have said as much today. Stories changed a little from his perspective.

Thanks this is helpful and I was a little concerned x

He sounds like one of life's moaners; he will moan whether he stays or goes.

If you go without him, at least you won't hear him.

Do it! I never take or try to take my dh on the annual family long weekend, he’d grin and bear it, but he’d hate it. Just take yourself and dd and have a brilliant time.

Oh I imagine he will. But you can point out that you've tried your best. In fact, say that this year you're booking the holiday you and DD want and next year he can choose the holiday - provided, of course, that he researches it, finds it and books it himself, and allows you and DD to offer constructive feedback 😉 on the plans before the booking is finalised. If for whatever reason that doesn't happen, guess you can do it your way again 🤷‍♀️

lol I know, despite me loving the beach, a pool and the sun have spent the last five years trudging round various UK resorts and no matter what I do or where we go we just don't have a nice time. He absolutely gets to do what he wants and holidays are always booked around there being a pub we can walk to. Honestly I'd quite like a year for me!

I feel a bit like we should be having lovely family holidays like everyone else but I'm at the point that I forcing something that won't happen x

@thismummydrinksgin in that case why don't you alternate? This year you plan it, next year he plans it.

And when he fails to plan anything you get a nice last minute sunshine break with the kids. Without him.