Men are difficult

[mylovelyboycat]

50% of people are men. 50% are women. I've lived in this flat for 5 years and 100% of the people who have caused problems are men. I don't want to live here anymore...

1. Very quickly after moving in I became aware of a horrendous stench and my flat filled with blue bottles every time I opened the window. Turns out a man was living in self neglect and squaller.

1. Self neglect man was taken into care, so we could all use our balconies and open our windows again. so the neighbouring man enjoyed his new found freedom to spend 24/7 smoking weed, singing and rapping on his balcony. It was unbearable. Man 2 threatened me when I complained.

1. The next man decides he didn't like the cannabis smoke, from man 2, so he started burning copious amounts of incense, which I started having as allergic reaction to. I tried to discuss this nicely with man 3, but he reached the conclusion that I was actually in love with him and was angry that he had rejected me and was pretending to have an allergic reaction.

1. Man 4 turned up at my door with a kitten calendar and some organic vegetables and thought he could save me.

1. Man 5 turned up, he's a drug dealer, noticed I didn't go out much, so set up a camera to monitor my movements and followed me everywhere. Literally stalking me. I reported this to the police but they said it wasn't a police matter.

I'm trying to move out now. Is anyone aware of any flats that you can rent where men are not allowed to live? I mean this could have been a really nice home for me!

My worst ever neighbours were two women. Weed smoking, 4am karaoke sessions, screaming rows at all hours of day and night, constantly having loads of random people over at weird hours who would behave incredibly badly in the street, threw their cigarettes over the fence into our garden, stole our parcels. They owned their house, so we couldn't even complain to a landlord about them.

Would you consider joining a convent?

all the women who live here seem to be able to do so without causing an unbearable stench

The man who was taken into some sort of sheltered accommodation/care? He sounds unwell, and I doubt it was caused by being a man.

I had a nightmare, nightmare flat share with a girl who was my best friend when I was in my twenties. I am married now and dh is great to live with. Yabu to say 'boys will be boys' what a generalisation.

I guess this thread isn’t going in the (men-bashing) way you hoped, OP?

@unmemorableusername I live in a massive block of flats. There is over 50 flats here.....men, women, children, single people, couples, old people etc etc. it's a normal block of flats. Out of the hundreds of people who live here everyone is okay except SOME of the MEN

@Mrsttcno1 you sound like a police officer. Do you work for my local neighbourhood police??! I am being sexually harassed. The police check that I am not being racist towards the man who is sexually harassing me. And they find that I'm not . So they wish him well and off they go!

@Behindthethymes yes I would. Are you offering me a space? Will I need to pay rent? Can I bring my cat to the convent .....he is a boy cat but he is very weird behaved and he is also very cute?

I doubt there are no women who self neglect or smoke weed tbh (drug dealers I’m not sure) but the sexual harassment you can obviously do without. Though I can’t blame man 3 for the incense, weed kinda stinks

I don't know why everyone is being facetious today. They all know what you're saying. I've lived in a block of flats like you describe and yes an annoying amount of the men who lived there did try chatting me up and getting quite pushy with it when you say not interested. As a pp said, it's not the same with women because the level of threat you feel from a man is completely different to a woman. It seems like nowadays men think they're entitled to make women feel completely uncomfortable and they just don't care. Have you tried speaking to anyone from your local council because surely someone should understand why a single woman in your position would feel scared and harassed at the constant attention from these men

Okay thanks everyone, I will try to accept that iabu in this case. I will try to be kinder to the men in my community who like to sing, rap, stalk, smoke weed outside of my window 24/7, harass, turn up with presents etc etc. I will send a memo round to the other women in the neighbourhood that if they are being troubled in a similar way to just BE KIND.

And that's why men are getting worse with the sexual harassment. Because all us women need to just Be Kind. Fuck that!

Perhaps you should have started a thread just saying AIBU to say the police are idiots for ignoring my report that a drug dealer is stalking me?

It doesn’t really help that man 1 was presumably mentally unwell rather than wilfully antisocial.

@Devilsmommy yes you get it. Many of the people who have commented on this thread would probably be terrified if they were in my shoes. No one can help. There is nothing the council can do, they have empathy for my situation, but there's a serious lack of housing here (private or social). The person who said JUST MOve.....where exactly? Where should I move to? A tent in the local park??

@Devilsmommy I'm glad you understand.

It sounds like it's 100% of the sample size though. That would be enough for me, they all sound unhinged

I'm going completely insane living here. If things continue along this trajectory I will soon end up in a psychiatric hospital or prison. I think they are usually single sex are they not?? Yay!

No, they are really quite simple.
Rather like spoiled, sulky, shouty, dirty overgrown children.
😂
Obviously, "not all men".
But most.
Never more!
👍

I think most on here do but for some reason they're being dicks today. Would there be any possibility of you moving to a different area at all?

Man 5 turned up, he's a drug dealer, noticed I didn't go out much, so set up a camera to monitor my movements and followed me everywhere. Literally stalking me. I reported this to the police but they said it wasn't a police matter.

Did he put a ring camera watching the shared corridor? Or specifically looking at your door? It seems to me a drug dealer would care more about cops and rival dealers than his random neighbour. By followed you, you mean, he's following you out of the building to town? He comes out and bothers you when you leave the house? Or you always see him about? Because this could either be a very scary situation or absolutely nothing depending on what's happening.

I’m currently visiting a general hospital ward, and 100% of the six patients are at least 65. Can I therefore deduce that everyone in the UK, or even every patient in this hospital, is elderly? No, because the sample size is so tiny as to be meaningless.

@Devilsmommy I m trying to move but it's going to take some time for this to happen.

Thanks it's okay, I am not in any disturbed by the responses to this aibu! It's interesting to see what people have to say. And this is aibu after all 😆

Men are very problematic I agree. I despise every single one of my male neighbours, we live in a small, neat block of council flats in a nice area. All of the men are insufferable, rude, aggressive and arrogant despite needing the council to house them/their families. Most, if not all smoke weed. Most, if not all drive super fancy huge cars. Most if not all, can never be bothered to throw the rubbish in the bin properly. The arrogance and entitlement of them is astounding.

@mossylog following me in and out of the building and accompanying me wherever I go. I believe he wishes to recruit me to work for him. My flat would be an ideal additional premises for his business

Has he ever said that to you? Or even tested the waters?

Or is it more that this is a scenario you've thought was likely?

(I guess on the positive side, at least you think he sees you as a potential colleague!)