To think people can make more of an effort with their gardens

[Lovelybitofsquirrel3]

Due to circumstances changing I moved from the family home (owned, not by me, by family) to a council estate a few years ago.
Generally people don’t bother to plant anything/haven’t bothered with their gardens. There are hardly any bees, butterflies or insects that visit and I’m finding it depressing. A lot of people haven’t bothered with their gardens.
I planted potatoes last year which were never pollinated, and one or two bees visited, I don’t know where from and they died quickly.
I’m not looking for excuses as to why people don’t plant but surely it’s simple to buy a few packets of seeds and turn over some turf.

Most people don't know much about gardening and even less about wildlife gardening, OP. And also if you can make your own garden a haven for wildlife perhaps it wil influence your neighbours and open up conversations, or even a local group. Gardens take years to establish also but generally if you have native plants, bug houses and messier areas, trees and a pond, build it and they will come.

I am not a professional but have RHS Practical Horticulture, and am fit and healthy and even I don't feel like tackling the garden at times. Life gets in the way. I can totally understand how others are less than enthusiastic.

Actually the converse is true for wild flowers. The conditions for them to grow are impoverished soil conditions, not fertilisers or compost. And many years of just leaving the soil to its own devices. The less you do, the higher likelihood of wild flowers thriving.

Council estates are deprived areas. So it stands to reason the people who host them are also deprived. The are normally money or time poor. I grew up in a council estate, only one house had a “garden with plants”. Now I live on a private estate and the majority have, tend to and look after a planted garden, and the majority of the estate are working families, or working singles with a few elders thrown in. The difference is stark but that’s also how you know if you live in a good area or not, people look after their gardens.

I think op made a valid point badly. We do have declining wildlife in our gardens but op seems to have assumed its because we're all lazy. Gardening is incredibly time consuming and expensive. Most families now have both parents working and jobs that erode into our evenings and weekends. It's no longer 9-5 and switch off. Round here there are lots of retired people who have lovely gardens but they have time (and money often because they already paid off their mortgages). The people with kids don't....unless their retired relatives live round the corner and come and garden for them. I've got a slightly wild garden backing onto fields which will never be neat and tidy as there is a constant onslaught of brambles and Ivy from the very untidy hedge. I've just embraced it.

If anyone does want to encourage insects with minimum effort I'd recommend Buddliea, climbing roses and honeysuckle or climbing jasmine as easy things that can go round the edge, tolerate a yearly hack back and be otherwise low maintenance. And maybe something with winter berries for the birds. And maybe a tree if you have room. That will be annoying because of the leaves but you can just pile them up in a corner to make mulch and kids love raking. We have a beech tree in our front garden which attracts bees by the thousands because it has these woolly aphid things which make the sticky sap come out of the leaves. I think they are mostly solitary bees but they seem to like it and the RHS website tells me it won't harm the tree.

I'm out in the garden almost every week and have been since I was about 5 years old.

If only people realised that a very small investment of time, in not a very ambitious way, will still pay dividends. 1-2 hours a week is all that's needed. People may not prioritise their gardens, and that's fine, but they are missing out on the MH benefits of being outdoors and seeing things grow. Plus getting DC outdoors from an early age instead of being indoors watching TV or staring at screens sets them up for a lifelong love of nature. No doubt it takes organisation, esp for DC but imo it's really worth it.

Your priorities are not other people’s priorities. I bought some bulbs this Autumn to plant because I’d love daffodils but by the time I found a minute to plant them, the ground was frozen and I’d left it too late. Maybe next year.

You're right it is simple, but a lot of people simple can't be bothered, which I don't get, as even very low effort, time and costs will produce some colourful flowers.

You can get seeds for a very low cost, or free out on a walk with the kids. Young kids also tend to enjoy a bit of gardening. My 3 yr old especially likes to 'help', and together we do bits of gardening and 1yr old plays outside or 'helps' sometimes too.

To attract butterflies buy a packet of Verbena bonarensis seeds ( less than £2) and sow them on soil in the spring on a sunny patch .

For bees , Lidl often do cheap lavender plants. plant in a sunny site. Lavender can tolerate dry summers

My kids are outdoors, but at the playground or in the woods, not gardening in our tiny garden. Don’t make assumptions about other people’s lifestyles just because they make different choices to you.

This is a discussion, no? I'm not making assumptions about your life, or anyone else's. I'm offering a few of my thoughts about the benefits of the outdoors and nature, and the fact it doesn't need to take a lot of time to enjoy the benefits.

a "tiny garden" is still a garden by the way. I don't think anyone on here is talking about the size of the garden mattering, just having a patch of earth, is all that's needed.

Not everyone has time OP- you must recognise that.

I love gardening but my circumstances mean I am left to make decisions about the little time I have to myself, That literally means exercise, a decent amount sleep, gardening, seeing friends and other life enhancing activities.
I have planted a number of trees and insect loving shrubs, and my garden is a bit of a sprawl, but does have regular visits from birds, foxes, hedgehogs, deer and squirrels.

I don't prioritise my garden but it's ok. I have a couple of flowering bushes that used to attract lots of bees and butterflies but last year there were barely any.

Yabu and judgemental. You don't know what is going on in people's lives.

They may have chronic hay fever, a phobia about creepy crawlies or three screaming toddlers and no time. Plus remember not everyone is taught how to grow things. Easy to plant a few seeds, get nothing to show for it and give up.

And the gardens of modern housing estates are vile, builders rubble covered in cheap turf. It can be very expensive to sort it out.

I have a garden, my pride & joy until 2021 when I found myself so dog-tired it was all I could do to keep up with work and the school run. A cancer diagnosis and three years treatment later, I'm back to normal but facing a garden gone wild. It will take years to get it back to anything close to tidy and fruitful.

This thread got mean quickly! I see people's points about why people don't for many reasons, but I think an important point it many people want to but genuinely don't know what they're doing, so it's not as simple as just 'stick some shrubs in'

When I moved to my first home with a garden I genuinely had no idea the difference between an annual flower and a a perennial and a shrub. I put something that needs full sun in the shade.

No one had ever taught me this stuff, but I didn't have a super hectic job and I had no kids and I was interested so I put in the time to learn, but it's taken years really. Now I'm moving to a brand new garden and my plan is to 'stick in some shrubs' but now I have the knowledge of what a shrub is, which ones to choose for which locations, which need pruning, which are evergreen etc.

Something is only simple if you know what you're doing and if no one's ever taught you, then it's not simple.

If the situation is causing you distress, offer to help:

Offer to garden other people’s gardens for them, or to look after their kids whilst they do it, or do their other tasks; offer to loan tools and give seeds. Or join a gardening club where you might find other people with whom you could discuss the situation and see what other communities do.

Totally agree!

"Something is only simple if you know what you're doing and if no one's ever taught you, then it's not simple.*

But nowadays it's actually quite simple. Internet. The never ending source of knowledge most of us have all the time in our pockets. For those who will come and say they have no internet, library books. Asking in store, asking sellers on flea market etc. The knowledge is everywhere

It doesn’t take much effort or money to sort out the garden, or do a bit of DIY and update the house or get yourself to the gym or eat healthily or do a hobby or look after your pets or kids or elderly parents or any other the other million things most of us do every week, it’s doing all of it that’s hard and expensive.

I would love to be in the garden more. I like the idea of having a little veg patch.

My issue is time, i work, my husband works, we have young children. I hardly have time to clean a bathroom and I don’t have time for much self care (my self care is napping at the weekend as I’m tired). Maybe once I’m less tired and don’t nap at weekends I could use that for gardening but I also have a list of things like exercise, meeting friends for lunch, cleaning, decorating, walking in the woods.

Currently my only spare time is 8.15-9pm once the kids are in bed and before I go to bed which I will use doing more work in my laptop, watching TV or just doing nothing. This spare time isn’t great for gardening with it being at night.

It all dies (some stuff never even grew) so I gave up .Threw some packets of wildflower seeds around last year. We'll see.

There's a clover patch that grew out of nowhere and kept spreading last summer and I hope it comes back again (and keeps spreading ) as it's very pretty.

I can't be arsed and I don't want to. There you go, is that the answer you were looking for so you can sneer about how lazy my generation are or whatever? I've got better things to do with my exceptionally limited free time than doss about on my hands and knees in the dirt. Snob away.

Cash poor (really can't get a 'few pots), time poor (kids, work, sleep), and disabled (tricky with bits missing).

Those are my excuses and I'm sticking to them.

Sometimes people don’t know how, if they weren’t shown by parents themselves. As adults they might be prioritising working and raising kids. Sounds like something you could possibly support with in your area? You could lead the way and teach people while bringing the community together.

We live in a lovely area but there’s a clutch of rented houses close by. The people don’t work and have let a lot of rubbish pile up. They have their issues and sad back stories. We’ve started paying the guy who lives there to tidy the local area (weeding cobbled paths and repointing) and he’s started to have a sense of pride in his own garden now. He’s working all hours, no longer getting paid. Everytime I see him I tell him what a wonderful contribution he’s making to the area.

You could do the same! It has to start somewhere. Maybe approach them to show their kids as a way in.

A big problem is that most people equate wildflowers with an unrealistic carpet of brightly coloured annuals. Real wildflowers in the UK are the 'minging weeds' of a PP. Dandelions, speedwell, all the straggly grasses, nettles - which are the hardworking backbone of wildlife sustenance. They need soil, roots, stems, seeds - not just flowers.

The attitudes on this thread are unnutterably depressing. I don't think you worded your OP well but I do agree that nature deprivation is the problem of everyone who owns land or buys food. However, a rampant, ignored 'weed-filled' plot on your estate may be more wildlife rich than a neat mown lawn surrounded by largely sterile shrubs and imported bulbs. Or worse - concrete and astroturf. Growing food is not about encouraging nature (though it is good for body and soul). 'Waste land' eg railway lines is incredibly wildlife rich. It may not look beautiful, but our aesthetic sensibilities need reeducation if our dwindling widlife is to have a chance.

I agree with a PP who said we should probably live more densely in cities and allow more wilderness with no human access outside this (the George Monbiot position). But humans get a lot from green spaces, gardening and growing, and that is not how our housing is arranged. I would say: don't see your plot/garden as a chore. See it as a space for nature to take a foothold. Remove hard surfaces, add a bucket or similar for a pond, allow things to grow and just see what comes. Mess is really really good.

Before I looked at the replies, I knew what you were going to get. If you suggest people wash more, wear clean clothes, keep their property even vaguely tidy (and I don't mean manicured lawns), you'll always get a barrage of responses that suggest that every single bugger has 'mental health', suffers from CoL problems, is working eight jobs, and has fourteen children with special needs.

OF COURSE some people have really crushingly hard circumstances and aren't being referred to, but anytime there is a discussion about people smelling bad as a group commuting, or a street of people, there is the usual assumption that every single one of them has ten very good reasons to not do whatever. Of course it's personal choice, and of course you can't force people to take any sort of pride or interest in their appearance or property, but it would be nice if as a community we could try.

It won't matter in the slightest that as a formerly very cash strapped single mother with two jobs and some neuro challenges I was still trying to keep up my front garden (happily in much better circs 20 years on). I should probably be counting my privilege and strapping myself to a stake for sharing the OPs opinion.