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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to being even ever so slightly miffed at my s2bxh's request?

85 replies

Citronella · 05/05/2008 21:20

Whilst just about being civil to each other over split arrangements he then said " oh and I would be grateful if you wouldn't throw out any of the good baby clothes for any future children I may have" I was then . I said you're having a laugh aren't you you really think I would let another woman have my babies' clothes? Meaning, another woman of his as opposed to any other woman (I regularly give outgrown clothes to charity shops). He said with a sarcastic smile there you go again being selfish and posessive".
Wouldn't you feel pretty p*ed off at that?

OP posts:
Dior · 05/05/2008 21:21

Message withdrawn

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 21:21

He's a cunt. You are well rid.

cluttercup · 05/05/2008 21:22

What a complete moron that man is! Go and grace the charity shops with your lovely baby clothes!

LuckySalem · 05/05/2008 21:22

OMG!! Idiot!!

moondog · 05/05/2008 21:23

How about if you had another baby though?
Would you want to use them?

(Just asking,I also think he is a knob to say it though.)

Elasticwoman · 05/05/2008 21:23

I suppose his point is that the baby clothes belong to each of you equally as parents, so he has as much right as you to use them again if the need arises.

But you have probably had much more to do with those clothes on a day to day basis and it was certainly a tactless comment, to say the least.

coppertop · 05/05/2008 21:23

I'd be tempted to ask him not to throw ot any of his clothes - just in case they happen to fit a future dp of yours.

He sounds like an arse.

nametaken · 05/05/2008 21:27

give his new partner the old baby clothes - covered in poo and sick and wee of course, don't wash them. I'm sure she'll appreciate having her partners ex wife's cast offs.

CombustibleLemon · 05/05/2008 21:27

Hmm. I imagine women will be queueing around the block for him to impregnate them, with his charm.

WanderingTrolley · 05/05/2008 21:28

Good lord.

What woman wants her dp's ex's baby clothes.

Is he even human?

yorkishbirdy · 05/05/2008 21:28

I would give them to charity and then tell him you are keeping them for when you have more children as you are fairly sure it will be before he does.

Idiot man

DirtySexyMummy · 05/05/2008 21:34

I can understand why you are annoyed, I really can. But try to remember that any subsequent children he has will be your childs half bothers or sisters, and would you really not want them using the clothes?

I know that I would give any of DS stuff to my ex if he were to have another child. It wouldn't be any different to me keeping them and using them for my own subsequent children.

I really don't mean to sound harsh, but I do think you are maybe being a little selfish?

CrazyMofo · 05/05/2008 21:36

What a knob!

Yes i would give them to charity or keep them for yourself for any future babies you might have

CrazyMofo · 05/05/2008 21:38

you are not being selfish, i would burn my DDs clothes before i gave them to any XP who threw that comment at me!

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 21:39

The point of keeping the clothes for subsequent children is that you get to cuddle them again, and see them get used, and I cannot see her doing a deal of cuddling of her exps future offspring!

paros · 05/05/2008 21:40

hes being a twat but you have to feel sorry for the woman who settles down with him .

Here you are darling ,my ex wife put these baby clothes away for you .

Original poster
Citronella · 05/05/2008 21:43

I doubt very very much I'll be having any more dc as I'm in my early forties.
Elasticwoman that is exactly his point. I suppose if I was in a position to use them with a new dp I might although by now they would be third hand. TBH I would definitely not want a dp's ex-wife's baby clothes and I certainly wouldn't ask for them. It's just tactless. Maybe it's just too soon for me to feel differently. A few years down the line and I might mellow a bit.

OP posts:
DirtySexyMummy · 05/05/2008 21:44

I actually think that is terribly sad, that you would presume that you will not stay on good enough terms with your ex to think of them using their childs clothes with a new partner.

Thankfully, my ex and I are on great terms, although it took time, and I know that I would be happy for my DS clothes to be passed on to his siblings, whether they be his mothers or fathers children.

mixformax · 05/05/2008 21:45

Is this a common trait that ex-hs (or stbxhs) have that they open their gob before engaging gear? Agree he seems a knob, and you should keep the fave ones for yourself, future children, or maybe even your grandchildren

Maybe pass over a bag of those faded, shapeless grobags that were kept at the back of the drawer for real dire emergencies - "just in case"

(PMSL at DSM's "bothers" - my DD has two "bothers too!)

KatyH · 05/05/2008 21:45

I'm sorry but I don't think I've met a man yet who gives a monkeys about baby clothes.

It sounds to me like a rather clumsy attempt at being hurtful. Treat it with the contempt it deserves!

CrazyMofo · 05/05/2008 21:46
Hmm
Original poster
Citronella · 05/05/2008 21:48

rofl paros

er no SmugColditz I don't think I will.
Best of wishes to my dc and any new siblings and I hope they would be close but don't (to x) include me.

OP posts:
SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 21:48

Well done, DSM, that you have managed to put all human feeling aside whilst dealing with your ex, but try to remember that Citronella and her husband haven't even split up yet, so being maybe not entirely cold blooded on the matter is fair normal!

DirtySexyMummy · 05/05/2008 21:50

Citronella - you wouldn't want to be included in your childrens brothers and sisters lives?

Elasticwoman · 05/05/2008 21:51

Citronella - don't speak too soon! I was prescribed condoms at age 46 when the doctor couldn't find the threads of my coil! PMSL at that and didn't use them, but if you are under 45, watch out - plenty of women that age are conceiving.

So he was trying to rub in his relative fertility as well. Nice man .

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