Why should one person do it all?

[ReachingOut8]

Why are people so against reaching out to an ex? I think my ex should take responsibility for the children as I didn’t make the alone. He has never taken any responsibility for them and has never had them overnight even though we split 8 years ago. I’ve never had a night to myself in that time and he hasn’t seen them at all in 2 years now. I mentioned reaching out to him because I shouldn’t be doing this alone and people (that I don’t know) told me it was obviously just me wanting him back in MY life?! I mean what? We’ve been split 8 years! How can people say this because you want a parent to take responsibility for the children they created! Almost like it’s said to just shame someone from needing support. How is it fair that one parent is left to do it all? So aibu for wanting him to step up and take some responsibility finally?

And if he says no?

If he hasn't had them overnight once in 8 years what makes you think he is going to start now?

If I were you op, I'd start looking into a plan B.

He offered in the summer..

Look at his actions though!! It seems like he has made the absolute minimum effort to be part of his children's life. He just isn't interested.

Based on the evidence here, he is not going to provide what you are looking for him to provide.

Do your kids actually want to see and spend time with their dad? You have said they haven't mentioned him? Did they enjoy spending time with him when they did see him in the past?

If you want a night out that badly, find a reliable babysitter. Why would you leave them with someone who is clearly not interested?

Where did I say I want a night out? I want a break 🤔

Not really, as he use to fall asleep during contact but if he has them in his house he won’t get that luxury.