AIBU to say "JUST EAT THE FU***NG CHEESE THEN!"

[JustSaltPlease]

Slightly dramatic title but honestly, my colleague is grating on me.

She is a vegetarian and every January she takes part in Veganuary.

We receive several photos and updates on what she is making for dinner/lunch etc each day and she talks quite a lot about it. I get it, when people are on diets they act the same I guess.

What is really boiling my piss, is that everything I bring to lunch she comments on.

Today is a cheese salad

"OMG I really miss cheese, I so wish I could eat cheese, this is so triggering" (triggering part is said light heartedly.

Yesterday I had a yoghurt and the conversation goes the same way.

Just eat the fucking cheese, why are you depriving yourself so much, for what? Veganuary? Is it worth it?

I just don't get why people do these things and then bitch about it every day. If you want it, have it. Life is too short!

😂 she sounds infuriating.

Tell her to stop being a part time vegan.

Vegan ‘cheese’ is very acceptable 🤣 she’s being very dramatic!

Please don't comment on my food when I am doing the courtesy of not commenting on your ridiculous and sanctimonious part time fad food.

Have you thought about putting on a concerned face and saying “Doris, I was worried you’d be like this again this year. Every year, you give up dairy for January and then are obsessed with it, constantly commenting about other people eating it. Why do you do this to yourself each year? If it was a permanent change I’d understand the transition would be hard, but you seem to just decide to make yourself miserable every January for no obvious reason. Are you ok?”

be concerned, worried. Next time she comments - “you’re obsessing about your odd January tradition again.”

Her saying the word triggering would also annoy me. Being a blunt person, I'd say 'you have a choice, eat some or shut up'.

If she's finding your food so triggering, perhaps she could use her precious little legsies and fuck off away from it, too? She's exercising her choice muscle to do and wank off about Veganary again, perhaps she could also use it to remove herself from imposing on you and your food (yet again) as well? But nooooo, that wouldnt be half as much fun, would it? Yeah, nah, fuck off Doris.

"You can eat it. You choose not to."

I'd eat away from this person. People who use 'triggering' for shit like this are annoying by default.

Absolutely idiotic. Not surprised you're getting annoyed. I think you should tell her you're not really interested in hearing about it.
Would disagree with PP that vegan cheese is acceptable though, perhaps a few brands/recipes but much of it is entirely unacceptable.
Also, there can't be too many Dorises still with us, surely? She must be beyond retirement age! 😁

"You know you aren't actually a vegan don't you? And you aren't being sponsored for this?"

Exactly how far is she taking this:

vegans do not wear animal skins because veganism is a lifestyle that avoids using animal products. This includes animal skins, fur, wool, feathers, and silk

Compliment her on her leather shoes/bag and woolly jumper

On the basis that there are billions of dairy free alternatives for yoghurt, icecream and cheese available these days (we’re a lactose free household) I’d be very tempted to tell her to STFU.

Or maybe just bring her a packet of dairy free cheese/4pack of soy yogurts on Monday and tell her that you really don’t want to hear about it any more…

I have a friend who did SoberOctober or whatever nonsense it's called. She used to "buy" a night off... Win for the charity I guess.

Honestly the unsolicited pictures and messages would annoy me the most.

You're at work and it's presumably a work chat group. Unless your boss is Gordon Ramsey, it's completely irrelevant and distracting to be messaging people multiple times a day about food - and food that's not even relevant to them. And potentially triggering for people who struggle with food issues/disorders or who have something else going on.

Every time she does it I think everyone should immediately message a photo of their cat or something random to the group.

I would hate that. I have been vegan for decades but apart from immediate family and friends I don't think anyone really knows. Going out for a meal, someone observant might notice but even then I keep any conversation about it to the absolute minimum.

Performative vegans give the rest of us a bad name.

Go onto the website of your nearest supermarket and send her the link for Vegan Cheese and Vegan Yoghurt, and suggest that she types "vegan" into the search box so she can see that these days there's a Vegan variation for most things!

😂 your post cracked me up.

No you aren’t unreasonable… I don’t get the “let’s do something random and be annoying for a month” fads either… worse if someone is banging on about it.

There is always some needy dramatic performative twat in every office. Make that your new year toleratetwats-anuary and feel virtuous with every escalating tantrum?

I wouldn’t have the patience with her. She sounds an absolute drama llama

It’s like the people who do dry January them moan non fucking stop about missing having a wine - well either have a wine or carry on but STFU no one cares

I'd be eating bacon sarnies,huge bloody steak sarnies, VAST prawn cocktails with minimum lettuce fried eggs.......

You forgot the head tilt.

At least she's not raising money while she's doing it. Or is she?

Bore off Doris.

I think you should just rub it in. Every time she says that, you agree and say "oh I could never go vegan, I would miss cheese too much. And this one is a great cheese, I love it. I've been looking forwards to it all day. ((Dramatic Pause)) ... CHEESE, GROMMIT!"

“How do you know if someone’s Vegan… don’t worry, they’ll tell you” springs to mind

my colleague is grating on me

Was that pun intended OP? 😁

They are all quite disgusting. My dd is lactose intolerant and we have tried so many alternatives but nothing comes close to products made from cow's milk. Especially cheese seems to be very hard to simulate. I feel bad for my dd because she used to love dairy free products and she misses them but for an adult it's not a massive deal i guess.

I guess, op's colleague might just be making conversation. Or maybe is genuinely finding it hard. Or maybe she is looking for validation. Who knows? Yes, maybe it's annoying and boring but everyone who tends to go on and on about what they are passionate about is annoying. I don't think there is a need to be nasty about it.

I'd pointedly pick up my lunch and without a word, go and eat it elsewhere