Parents complaining about this in school?

[WillowAnn]

DC are not properly watched whilst eating at dinner time and allowed to just go outside whenever they’re finished. So they could basically have no dinner or just a very small amount and then go out to play. Staff don’t advise them to eat more or say they can’t go out until they’ve eaten. Parents are complaining. Any thoughts?

I wonder if the parents complaining have slow eaters? The kid sees their mates going out to play and finish up early because they don't want to miss out? Therefore not eating enough for them. But not much can be done about that.

You are making a huge and quite erroneous assumption that I was assuming anything of the sort. I wanted to know how OP knows that this is what happens because, otherwise, there's really no point in having a discussion about it.. OP might work at the school, they might have friends who do, they might have heard it 2nd, 3rd, 10th hand, they might have been told this by their child. For what it's worth (though it's none of your business), I believed what my children told me, unless I had a good reason not to. It's a good starting point for all sorts of reasons. I was also a lunchtime supervisor briefly about 20 years ago so I know that you cannot make a child eat anything, nor should you try to. Just to make my point clear, as you seem to need a micro explanation, I wasn't assuming any of the things you tell me I was.
I would still like to know how the OP knows this though.

Wow! What has that diatribe got to do with my post?

Gosh yes, I can still taste that lumpy mash deposited from an ice cream scoop and spam fritters. I would be kept at the table until afternoon lessons resumed. Primary school in the 70s.

The lunches at secondary were Michelin starred in comparison. Lasagne, ice cream, cheese and crackers.

Dull day in wherever you live?

It was the one and only time I ever had school dinner. I asked mum not to send me for dinners again.

I trust my child to know when they've had enough to eat and wouldn't appreciate another adult encouraging them to eat more if they didn't need or want it.

good grief, if they are hungry, they eat, or they'll eat later, what's the big deal. They finish school at 3 in the afternoon anyway.

They are made to stay in class, and show good learning behaviour during lessons - as they should. If they want to blow steam and play at lunch time, let them play!

Would you like to be forced to sit down at a lunch table at work instead of grabbing a quick bite and do whatever you want to do during your break? Of course not.

Parents will complain about anything in this country.

This was my experience as a kid- awful

Well I can assure at my school in the 90s, there was no such sight. Scottish working class town, where 40% of the kids qualified for free school meals. Everybody ate their lunch and happily.

Forcing kids to eat when they don't want to can cause lifelong issues with food, teaching kids to listen to their bodies is a much better way to go. If a kid is hungry one day because they didn't eat enough they will learn from that mistake, an afternoon feeling a bit hungry won't harm them. Totally unreasonable for parents to complain, school age children are capable of having responsibility for their own intake.

Jammy dodger?

@WillowAnn

I don’t think the staff should be saying things like “you can’t go to play before you’ve eaten” because of the negative impact this could have.

There are far more problems with child obesity in the UK than under eating - and I think children are pretty good at self regulating what they eat - far, far better than a lot of adults.

I also think children often naturally make healthy choices until adults start insisting that they eat less healthy foods like chips, or chicken nuggets.

So long as a child has access to food when they are hungry I think they are ok.

The issues come with adults forcing and applying their adult sized appetites on young children.

I was underweight, my mam had the school have someone stand over me... occasionally when very young the force fed me. It was INCREDIBLY dangerous (choked/vomited several times and had reactions to foods I was forced to eat that shouldn't have). As I got older (past infants school) they stopped physically forcing me to eat but would stand over me refusing to let me move or leave and demand I ate. Often ended in a stalemate (I couldn't eat half of what was served anyway) when time ran out and I had to go back to class which further segregated me from other children.

Its abuse of power over the most vulnerable.

I absolutely would NEVER support it being done to other kids. Its draconian and abusive.

I was definitely force fed in the early 90s, North of England working class town with free school meals (not sure what that has to do with it though).

Schools are in loco parentis. You are responsible for looking after the child while they are in your care. So yes, it is your responsibility to get a child to eat if they aren't eating well, because that's basic care. Primary school children are still very young, especially in KS1 and in early KS2.

Unless schools are going to let parents come into school to help their child at lunch, then yes staff should be doing that, it's all part of the job.

I went to a private school and our lunchtime was a set time when we all sat at long tables and ate at the same time. Once everyone was finished and the plates cleared, then we went out to play. Quick eaters learned to chat to others, slow ones learned to speed up a bit before the course was cleared. Each table was supervised by a teacher sitting and eating with us.

I think a similar system of a set eating time as a previous poster also suggested would help a lot. Fast eaters would know they had to sit and chat, and slow ones would know they had a set time in which to eat. Then everyone gets the same playtime.

My son was one of those who would not eat because he just wanted to go and play, ace I had to ask the school to monitor him a bit because he was starving and so angry by hometime as a result. Some days he was literally only eating a packet of crisps. If I only gave him crisps for lunch and no other food that would be seen as neglect, but people on this thread seen to think it's ok if it happens at school. It's baffling.

I despair of this attitude that children's basic human needs are inconveniencing teachers. Education is about much more than numeracy and literacy and if you don't know that then you shouldn't be teaching.

I'm a school catering assistant;the lunch time supervisors encourage the children to eat but don't force them.

Realistically not all children like the food that's put in front of them,there is limited time to eat the food,the children are distracted by chatting to friends etc;the difference between the school I work at and your child's is that the whole year goes back out into the playground together.

I'm also one who remembers being made to eat school dinners that I hated, I was a fussy child (still am) and it was such a stressful experience. I wouldn't want my child being forced to eat.

If you offered him a sandwich and packet of crisps at home but he only ate the packet of crisps then of course it's not neglect

Teachers on Burgundy Book C&S do not have to do lunch duties. They are not paid to do this.

Lazy journo or Ai?

I still remember being made to sit at the table at home with a plate of cold food in front of me with my dad telling me I couldn't leave the table until I finished it. Didn't stop me being a Selective eater as an adult.

I wouldn't want my child to be supervised in terms of eating. My children have always eaten to appetite. Some times my youngest has food left other, other times not but if someone was telling him to finish everything he would become upset over that. I would want supervision though in terms of safety issues such as choking or just making sure there's no problems with other children.

I would be more annoyed if the opposite happened - if my DC were being pressurised to eat more than they wanted. I used to be a dinnerlady and was once told off for telling a little girl she didn't have to eat a sandwich she clearly didn't like at all. When another dinnerlady told her she did have to eat at least part of it, she was really distressed. My preferred solution would have been for her to leave it, but for her teacher to tell the parent at the end of the day that she had not eaten it and suggest maybe she shouldn't have that filling again if it was important to the parent that she should eat it all.

If you expect teachers (as opposed to MDS) to stand over children making sure they eat when do you think they will have their own lunch and prepare for the afternoon, maybe if they're lucky, have a few minutes down time?