Male staff in nursery’s

[Itsoneofthose]

Ok, hear me out.. I know this is controversial but today I was shown around a nursery for the first time. I’m dreading leaving my little one, only because I’ll miss her and worry about her. I don’t think my worry is out of proportion or anything like that though. But today I saw two male nursery nurses. Now, I know there are many men who are great with kids, and not all men are a threat to children (obviously) and women can also potentially pose a threat to children but I just don’t know how I feel about male nursery staff. Hmmm. I know I’ll be shot down in flames for this. Nursery’s are well regulated etc etc. I just can’t help feeling a bit uneasy about the whole thing. Has anyone else experienced these thoughts? AIBU

Yes including the father.
In all circumstances to the best of my ability I made all reasonable efforts to ensure my child's safety.

That safety extends to outside the home, where I also make all reasonable efforts to ensure my child's safety. If that meant choosing a nursery that I felt was a safer, more controllable environment, over another nursery. Then I would have done it - just as the OP is considering. It is a reasonable effort.

It's not hard and it harms no-one.
All those parents who prefer males in a pre-school for their children can make that choice too.

My child is now 15 so my concerns have moved away from sexual abuse and I'm currently more focused on keeping him aware of the signs of being groomed into county lines - rife in my area.

There are risks at every stage/age.

I feel that at the preschool stage, sexual abuse risk is increased if males are present.
It's therefore my, and the OP's, and anyone else who feels this way, prerogative, to choose the preschool for their own children accordingly.

And there isn't a person on this earth that will convince me otherwise.

You had a child with someone you think may be a peadophile? 🤯

Exactly. Such weird rationale. Apparently young women want to take a low paid job, and change nappies because they just love children so much.

Yet my son (and other young men) who wants to work with children must be doing it for nefarious reasons. And he doesn't particularly want to change nappies, he just accepts that it is a part of the job that he may have to do depending on the setting.

Choosing to ignore the two links which SPECIFICALLY say women are more likely to commit abuse then?

I can't believe that someone has literally said they kept their child away from their father

Do you think we can tell her she was a Risk to them too?

I'm sorry, reading this thread must have been rough for you.

As you said, if they have a problem with it, just don't do it. Ultimately it will be their child who looses out by having to keep moving setting/schools to get away from 'males', from not having a rounded experience, from avoiding excellent settings just because they have male staff.

If I asked on here, AIBU to say "I dont want an Arabic/certain Asian cultures male treating me in hospital' as statistically they treat women worse, I would be eaten alive on here as racist.
But somehow being sexist is fine!

And to add to this

There were 4 women involved in the Vanessa George case.

One of the links I shared was also to that of a female nursery worker charged for child sex abuse

Whilst not in nursery, I could also find several stories of female teachers sleeping with their male pupils too

Yeah right, that's what I said 🙄🙄🙄

Fool.

That is the logical conclusion to draw from your previous statement.

Wow. Talk about offensive.

I have seen no links which back up your claim that:

evidence shows that, in a care setting, women are more likely to physically, mentally and emotionally abuse their charges

Please supply these links again.

What that my son's father is a paedophile?

Jog on.

There's 3 of you on this thread that will do anything to stop women from having concerns about men around their pre-school children.

I wonder why you are so protective of men who want to work with children, rather than the children themselves ? 🤔

Perhaps you are all historic members of PIE

Welcome to Mumsnet. And well done for trying so hard to write in your second language of Intelligent. You'll get there one day.

A bit less homophobia would be nice.

No one said it never happens.

But its more likely to be a man sexually abusing a pre-school child, or any child in fact, than a woman.

You banging on about the odd case where a woman has abused a child isn't going to change the fact that it's more likely, statistically, in all the gathered evidence over many, many years, to be a MAN.

https://www.jordanssolicitors.co.uk/insights/abuse-and-redress-schemes/child-abuse-and-neglect-in-nurseries

Ah there we go

I wondered how long until the ridiculous accusations

But you claimed you could only find 2 cases. When one of those cases involved 4 women

Which was what I was refuting

Because you were misrepresenting the facts

But then you're only concern is sexual abuse and you don't care that women literally KILL babies in their care

This is a link to a story about 1 woman.

It is not ''evidence (which) shows that, in a care setting, women are more likely to physically, mentally and emotionally abuse their charges''

It done not back up your claim.

Try again

What's an effeminate nance?

You clearly didn't read it

Since it mentions more than one case for a start

You're clearly just trying to skew the debate by changing it into something else.

You said you had evidence (which) shows that, in a care setting, women are more likely to physically, mentally and emotionally abuse their charges.

So where is this evidence?
One, two, 3 dozen news stories does not equate to actual evidence.

Most abuse as a whole is from women according to the safeguarding training I've done. Certainly in my experience of childcare the low level 'can't be bothered' attitude seems far more prevalent in female workers compared with the male ones. I think it's possibly due to the men being more committed to childcare, which they have to be in order to overcome all the prejudice. I would also imagine female mechanics must be pretty committed to their profession to overcome all the crap they get.

It doesn't matter how many cases it discusses, it's still not evidence that backs up your claim that ''in a care setting, women are more likely to physically, mentally and emotionally abuse their charges''.

Your claim is just not true - unless you provide actual evidence.

How many times will this come up as a thread. You dont like it, dont go there.