Stbxh says he can't see ds for a month unless he stays at my house this weekend

[SoonToBePinocchiosExWife]

Stbxh sees ds6 every other weekend at his parents house near to me (because he moved 3 hours away and it's the only practical option.). He says he can't stay there this weekend so could he stay here. If not, then it means ds won't see him for a whole month. Ds would be very upset by this, as it happened once before that he didn't see him for a month. AIBU to be peed off over this?

I agree, document the lot!

Document everything for future use.

He’s angry you didn’t jump to do his bidding so he’s punishing you and hoping to ruin your plans.

Don’t allow him to manipulate you into letting him stay at yours.

A hotel is absolutely fine, kids love it.

He didn’t book the hotel he drove down for the day.

@SoonToBePinocchiosExWife I think he is lying about having booked a room!! how can he possibly say that he cant have his child in a hotel? do not cave in for this quest!

Where’s the nearest premier inn?

why can’t he?
surely he and son can share a big bed?

Sounds like either:
a) he has alternative plans for his evening in the hotel
b) he never booked the hotel and was hoping you’d relent and let him stay so DS isn’t disappointed (and he can make you the bad guy if you say no)

Does he ever take DS to where he currently lives? Why couldn’t he stay at his DMs even if they’re not there - or is it that he can’t be arsed with parenting?

Get it documented, go to court and make sure CMS reflects his lack of fucks about his child. Useless prick.

I expect its because normally at his mum's he (or she!) Puts DS to bed and then he's got his evening to have some drinks, watch TV, whatever. He's thinking he'll give DS back to you for bedtime and go back to the hotel bar for the evening. He doesn't want to sit in the dark in a hotel room with his son.

Keep a diary of all this. He has deliberately got in the way of you having an evening off, and has lost you half a day of work.
What a prick.

He's relying on you not wanting the bairn upset to cave. Assume for now he's going to mess you around. No more cancelling work and have a babysitter on standby when he messes you around. He can wait for you.

Don't cave, he's going to be a dick but that's on him.

Either he's lying about having booked the hotel.

Or he's booked the hotel but wants to keep his evening free - and the room - because he's planning to hook up with someone.

I agree with going to court to get a CAO enforced. Document everything.

Has he just booked the hotel for daytime or something? Has he fallen out with his parents?

Ridiculous, of course he could have a child in the hotel room, absolutely no reason why not. Do not let him stay with you under any circumstances and make sure future arrangements are made in writing.

This. I did this. He didn’t show. DS learnt.

Next time when he collects you say of course you can have a child in a hotel room and I will be out until late, so you won’t be able to drop him back, he has a bag (I assume he doesn’t have keys!!$

Assuming he doesnt have keys to your house you need to txt him after he’s gone out with DS that you’ve had a change of plans and won’t be back tonight and he needs to have him overnight. Then go out and leave him to it !

or the next time I’d let him drive all the way to you and then be out with DS when he gets there so he has a wasted journey.

I would put this straight back to him

That’s a shame, you’ll need to make other arrangements then

Don’t let yourself be the default option